Head First, Fearless
by screamingXpixie
Summary: AU Naomi and Emily both had entirely different upbringings. When they meet, they go through everything together, but eventually they discover that when it comes to love, its out of your hands. You have to be fearless.
1. Happy Birthday

AU

Emily Fitch – 15 years old – Bristol

It's our birthday today. I've always hated birthdays. We always end up having some massive party with all of Katie's cuntish friends and I'm left doing Playstation with James while Katie spends hours sneaking MDMA and behaving like a slag. Not that I care much; it's not like I would willingly spend more than 5 seconds in the company of Katie's friends. I just wish it mattered a little more what I want. I wish Katie wasn't such a bloody bitch!

This year is different though. James is over at Gordon McPhearson's so I'm stuck here sitting next to Katie, who of course is the center of attention, just trying to blend into the furniture. Happy Fucking Birthday to me!

"Ems…. Ems…. Ems!" I'm pulled from my thoughts to find Katie and Dicksplash, fucking Danny Guilermo, Katie's knob of a boyfriend, looking at me like I have 3 heads. I fight the urge to roll my eyes. I so don't care what they want. Katie probably wants to show off the "twin thing". As for Dicksplash, I wish he would just fuck off and die.

I let out a deep sigh "Yes?" I hiss.

"Geez, moody much?" Katie spits, "… Anyway, I just wanted to tell you we're going downstairs… Mum says it's cool for us to have some 'private time'" she air quotes with a grin, "… so come on! Me and you will grab the lounge chair, have some twin time, yeah?"

I was a bit confused by Katie's request (if you could even call it that) for twin time, but I'm not complaining. Besides, Danny is probably being a twat about something, she probably needs me to keep her from losing her shit. I shrug as I take her outstretched hand and she drags me into the basement to our game room. As soon as we sat down in the lounge chair Katie grabbed my arms and put them around her waist. Again, odd behavior, especially around her friends, but whatever, the half a bottle of Vodka I drank before the party was helping me to not care about much. That is why I drank it after all.

I was actually quite enjoying my time with Katie, strange as it was. She was still giving all of her attention to Dicksplash and her slags, but it was really nice just having her close to me on our birthday. I've really missed this.

I WAS enjoying my time with Katie… that is until I noticed Dicksplash shooting daggers at me from his place on the sofa. I realized then that Katie was looking a little tense, so I assumed he must have been doing so for quite some time. What the fuck is his problem?

Another hour passed before I learned exactly what the fuck his problem was.

I watched him lean over to a guy on his left, I didn't really care who he was… as long as I added "-O" to the end of his name, I'm sure he wouldn't give a shit what I called him.

"Too fuckin' right, man!" I heard Danny say, "I love a twin thing as much as the next guy but if Katie don't get her arse on my cock soon I'm fuckin' out!"

Oh Jesus! I didn't even bother covering my eye roll. It all made sense, now. Katie was being cuddly to try and turn on her boyfriend and now he was upset because I got to touch her and he didn't. This is bloody ridiculous!

Danny nodded to his mate and started shifting in his seat. He was getting up. A second later he was stood in front of us with a cheeky smile on his face.

"Hey Ems," he said, all the while smacking his lips on his chewing gum, "don't think you could bugger off for a bit, do ya? I been 'finkin 'bout me an' Katie havin' some 'private time', yeah?" he air quoted with a toothy grin, clearly enjoying the thought of what my mother would think, "One of the lads would be glad to keep you company." He waggled his eyebrows.

Katie jumped in before I had time to reply. "Could you fuck off, babes? We're having twin time!"

I knew fuck all about Danny, but I could tell by the look on his face that he was not happy. The second 'fuck off' had left Katie's lips, the vein in his forehead started to bulge. I looked from him to Katie, and back to him.

He shook his head, grin completely gone from his face. "Actually, girl, I don't fuckin' 'fink I can!" he spat, "This is bullshit, yeah? Bein' a fuckin' tease an' all that! You didn't even want her here in the first place! Said you was tired of her followin' you 'round, didn't ya? Besides, s'my hands that should be all over ya, yeah? Not hers! If she wasn't your fuckin' sister I'd 'fink she was after me pussy!"

My face was suddenly hot, a red hue slowly seeping into my vision. After his pussy!? She's my fucking sister! And I'm not even fucking gay! And this is my fucking house! And it's my fucking birthday! Who the fuck does he think he is!?

I looked over at Katie whose mouth was gaping. Clearly, she wasn't used to seeing Dicksplash behave quite so twattish. I looked back in Danny's direction, expecting him to have fucked off back to Knobville, but he was still there. He didn't look angry anymore, though. His face was contorted in a way that was hard to describe… Amused? Evil? Satisfied? A bit of all three, I suppose. He opened his mouth and the shit poured out.

"You're just a dirty fuckin' lezzer, aren't ya?" He looked me right in the eye.

My vision surged with red, nearly blinding. I blinked to focus. He leaned in closer to me and nodded.

"A fuckin' faggot, that's what you are! An' your own bloody sister can't even stand you neither." He spoke so smoothly, shaking his head, his voice was melodic as if he already knew what their outcome would be.

Before I knew it I was on my feet, having pushed Katie to the side. A final surge of red invaded my vision. My pulse pounded. My head swam. Every conscious thought I had had been ripped from my skull to be replaced with pure rage.

When my mind came back to me, it did so slowly. The first thing I noticed was that my throat felt like it was on fire and I had a massive headache. I focused my eyes and found a room full of people staring; some at me, some at the floor, all of them mouths agape. I followed the stare of those looking at the floor and found Danny's limp body lying there, a trickle of blood flowing down his face. On the floor surrounding him were the remnants of a lamp, the lamp from the side table next to the lounge chair. When my hearing kicked in I could hear footsteps coming down the stairs, my mum's voice along with them, sounding panicked.

I turned in time to see my mum reach the game room. She looked as if she had seen a ghost. She hurried over to Danny and looked him over. I watched silently, my memories slowly coming back to me of what happened when I blacked out, my eyes slowly widening in shock at my actions. Mum called Dad downstairs and asked him to get Danny to a hospital and I watched as Dad dragged him out of the room. Mum asked all the guests to leave and followed them upstairs, returning once they had all gone.

I was vaguely aware that Katie was stood next to and slightly behind me as Mum re-entered the room. She stared at the both of us for several minutes before speaking.

"Do either of you want to tell me what the bloody hell happened down here!?" She seethed, "I know now that letting the two of you have any privacy can only end in catastrophe!"

I stared at her dumbly. What was I supposed to say? Oh you know, I just went mental and nearly killed Katie's boyfriend… no biggie! Thankfully, Katie came to my rescue.

"He was being cruel to her, Mum!" she spoke in a tone that hinted pleading, "I was going to set him right but I didn't have to! Emsy fucking knocked his lights out! It was bloody brilliant, actually! He's been a twat all day, he fucking deserved it!"

My senses went dead again as my head started swimming with thoughts. Why had he acted that way, anyway? I mean Katie was the one pissing him off, why did he come after me? I just didn't understand… BOOM! Out of nowhere it hits me! Rachel! I hadn't known at the time that she was Danny's little sister, or I certainly wouldn't have been dumb enough to-… but I was drunk! And I was high on MDMA… it's not like I meant to… Great! So I snog some random girl at a party while I'm on bloody drugs and my whole life goes tits up! Dicksplash has to be a fucking dicksplash at our party all because I (not responsible for it!) snogged his sister! I had fucking enjoyed it though… she was so bloody sexy, and her lips were smooth and full… and her bum was so… God! I shook my head slowly, clearing the thoughts away. You're not fucking gay, Emily! I inwardly scolded. You're not Gay! You're not Gay! You're not… are you? My mind swam through the past few years: A few of Katie's less slaggy friends that I had been all to happy to be around and frequently tried to impress, a few girls from school that I constantly caught myself staring at… I fell to my knees, feeling the sob rip through my chest without my consent.

"Ems?" I barely hear Katie say as I clenched my fists against my knees. I somehow knew Mum had left. Through tears I could just make out Katie's form stepping closer to me, she knelt down a few feet away, her face shocked and concerned as she stared at me. I looked away, shielding my face with my hair. I couldn't let her see. I could never let any of them see. They would hate me if they found out. I always heard the things Mum said, always saw Katie nodding in agreement. Why did this have to happen to me? Why couldn't I have just been normal? My head pounded as more sobs ripped through my body. I could feel my heart hardening as I started my attempt to protect it from breaking. I could already feel the cracks starting to form. I cried until I had no tears left, feeling my body relax slightly at the end, knowing I was done for now. I sat steadying my breathing for a few minutes before Katie sat up slightly and walked on her knees until she was right in front of me. She tilted my head and looked me in the eyes, face still full of concern.

"Emsy? A-are you alright?" she stuttered out, carefully. Based on my behavior today, I couldn't blame her for being cautious. I shook my head and sniffled, barely holding back another wave of tears. We sat silently for another few moments. Katie seemed to be gathering her thoughts. She sighed.

"Ems are you…" she hesitated, "are you g-.." she let out a deep breath "are you gay?"

Tears flooded my eyes once again and I felt a large hole rip into my heart. I took a moment to try and compose myself before nodding. "Yeah… yeah, I think so, Kay." I croaked out.

I saw a single tear fall down Katie's cheek before she threw her arms around me.

"It's ok, Ems! It's ok!" she soothed as she rubbed my back, I clung to her. "I love you no matter what! I'll always love you!" both of our grips tightened. As we sat there crying together, I felt the weight on my heart lighten a little. She still loved me. My sister still loved me. "Thank you, Kay" I sobbed, "I love you so much!"


	2. Goodbye London, Hello Bristol

**Disclaimer: I do not own skins, but I do own an unhealthy obsession with Naomily.**

**AN: So this one isn't as long as the last chapter, but it can only be as long as is needed. I'm not sure if my edits stuck for the last chapter so I'll say again in this AN that this story is a work in progress based upon actual events in either mine or my girlfriends life. The previous chapter, Emily's, was based on an event from my life. This chapter is based on events from my girlfriend's. I don't think the correlation between her, Naomi- Me, Emily will be consistent, but I guess we'll find out. Enjoy.**

Naomi Campbell – 13 years old – London

_Fucking great! Dad's done drawn his last fucking straw and this time he's been such a twat that Mum's decided we're leaving. So here we go to bloody Bristol! _

I take one last look around the room before gathering my last box and carrying it downstairs and into the moving truck.

"Naomi, darling!," Mum calls from the porch, "I hope you're just about ready, Anthea will be here any moment and we're in a bit of a hurry. We've got to get there before the truck so that we can show them where things go."

"Yeah, Mum," I call back, releasing a sigh and squinting into the sun, "It's all sorted. I just put my last box on the truck. Will Effy be with her?"

Mum smiled at me, picking up on my obvious excitement to see Effy. "Of course, dear," she mused, "do you really think Elizabeth would pass up the opportunity to say goodbye to this dump? I don't know why you two are so fond of this stack of bricks! Then again, I suppose I never will, will I? You're both so bloody cryptic all the time."

Anthea and Mum have been friends since college, but after getting married and all they stopped seeing each other as much. That's how come Effy and I didn't actually meet until we were 5 when she and Anthea came to visit and stayed here with us for a week. Eff and I became best friends instantly and so thankfully, they started coming round much more often. Effy would always come and stay the summer and we would spend the whole time either up in my room smoking spliff and chatting or out cycling around town and getting into trouble. I trust Eff more than I do anyone, now. She's the only person who really knows me.

I smiled at the familiar car coming up the road before turning my attention back to my mother, "Eff's the cryptic one, Mum, I'm just not big on spending my valuable time having conversations with dinosaurs." Mum reacted to my jibe at her age by picking up the closest object she could find and hurling it at my head. Luckily I dodged it in time as the object happened to be a garden gnome. "Jesus, Mum, you trying to kill m-…"

My sentence was cut off by someone, no doubt Effy, tackling me to the ground from behind and nearly planting my face into the grass. I spun around quickly, as quickly as someone caught off guard could spin around, and tackled Effy right back, pinning her to the ground beneath me.

"You're gonna pay for that, Stonem!" I threatened as I lightly smacked her around the face and she exaggerated each touch by throwing her face in the opposite direction and crying out in feigned pain. "That's right, bitch, and don't you forget it!" I pretended to spit on her as I jumped to my feet before reaching down and pulling her up as well. A wide grin spread across her face.

"You twat." She said before wrapping me in a tight hug, causing my own smile to grow even wider.

"Yeah, well, you started it." I laughed. She laughed as well and we pulled out of our hug and beamed at each other.

"Alright you two," Mum called to us, "Effy, come here and give your Auntie Gina a hug and then you girls have five minutes to go say your goodbyes to this hell hole."

After our five permitted minutes, plus another five more, we had walked around the whole house hand in hand, silently reliving our childhood memories and smiling at one another before saying our goodbyes to the porch and climbing into the car. It was an uneventful ride back to Bristol in which Mum and Anthea spent the whole ride raving about how me were bastards and Effy and I punctuated occasionally with eye rolls and amused smirks.

After about three hours of unpacking and organizing I was just about settled into Effy's old room. (Effy had already moved her things into Tony's old room down the hall as Tony was now staying with his dad at their new flat. Mum and Anthea, to my understanding, were to share a room.) It wasn't like my old room at all, but I figure that within a few months it can acquire that same Naomi Campbell style. I kicked off my shoes, changed into shorts and a baggy t-shirt and headed down the hall, spliff in hand, to Effy's room.

"Hey Eff," I said as I tapped the door.

"Come in." she said, and I slipped inside, locking the door behind me. "You know, you don't have to knock, you've seen me naked before!"

Effy wasn't naked, but she was walking around in just her knickers and bra. "I know," putting a discarded towel by the crack of the door as I spoke, "but you might've been wanking or something."

Effy chuckled and threw a t-shirt at my face. I feigned annoyance. "Jesus, what is this? Try to injure Naomi day? Anyway…" I said, holding up my prize, "I've got spliff, so you'd better be nice to me or I'm not sharing."

We sat on the bed, grabbing a cup from the nightstand to ash in, and sparked up the spliff. We sat quietly, smoking, until it was burned out and I placed the roach on Effy's nightstand for her to do with as she pleased, I figured she would probably put it into a bowl later or something. I was taken by surprise when I leaned back towards my place and was met with Effy's lips on mine. As soon as the shock wore off, I pulled away, wiping my lips.

"Eff! What are you doing!?" I asked in surprise.

She shrugged. "I dunno," she said, "I'm high, I'm bored, I'm horny, I figured why not?"

"You're gay?" I asked, completely dumbfounded.

Effy laughed. "Of course not, you twat!" she slapped my arm, "And you're not either, I just figured we've got no one else around, we might as well take advantage of each other."

I couldn't help but laugh. "So you're saying that since we're high and horny and the only people around, than we should just fuck each other, just because we can?"

She looked me in the eye, smirking, "That's what I'm saying, Campbell. You up for it?"

I sat silently, staring at my hands as I thought over her proposition. I was horny, but Effy was my friend and I didn't things to be weird between us. Plus I had never slept with someone before, let alone a girl, and had no idea what I was doing. But it would be an interesting experience, and Effy's my best friend, so it's not like she would judge me or anything. And I was horny… I let out a deep breath.

"Alright, Stonem, I'll play. But this stays between us, yeah?"

* * *

Two hours later and I'm lying in bed, thinking about what just happened. I just had sex with my best friend. I just had sex with my best friend. I just… ok, yeah. It's sinking in now. What the fuck was I thinking? Oh yeah, I wasn't, I was high and horny! I shook my head. Oh well, what's done is done I suppose. But this doesn't mean I'm gay, does it? I mean, I did enjoy it. Effy's tits are awesome! … But that still doesn't make me gay, right? I mean, I've never looked at any other girls like that… Well, that's not entirely true. Ugh! Shut up, Brain!

I let out another sigh and got up to look out the window. On the way there I spotted a book sticking out from under the bed. The cover told me it was Effy's from the previous year. I flipped on my bedside lamp and started to flip through the pages. I chuckled at the awkward students with braces and pimples and awkward smiles until something caught my eye. Two photos, side by side, of twin girls. The one on the left had a bow in her hair and a shy smile on her face. She was beautiful. She appeared to have dark eyes and hair but it was difficult to tell from the black and white picture. I flipped my light off again and layed back on my bed. As I tried on different colors in my mental image of the picture, I wondered which would be the true color of her hair. The image stuck in my mind as I drifted off to sleep.

**AN: It's 5 am now and I'm going to bed, but don't worry about a wait with me, when I get started I can't stop. There will be more chapters tomorrow. Until then, review please, and let me know what you think so far. :)**


	3. Noises Down the Hall

Naomi Campbell – 16 years old – Bristol

The last few years have passed pretty uneventfully. I had a boyfriend for a few months somewhere in there, he was a decent shag and he kept me busy, which is about all I wanted him for anyway. Eff went through about six, herself, each one more twattish than the last. She wouldn't listen to me when I told her I didn't like them. "It's none of your business, Campbell." She would say to me. I learned to just keep quiet about it. They never stuck around long anyway.

I don't really know what's going on between me and Eff. We still hang out just as much as ever, but she doesn't really talk to me anymore. Not since that night three years ago. It's happened a few more times since then, and Eff says it doesn't matter, that we're just using each other and we're both cool with it so its ok. I'm not sure that's right, though. Not with the way she's been acting lately.

Her last boyfriend was this really religious bloke. He convinced Effy to go along with him to Chapel every week. Fucking Bruno was his name. I still marvel at the stupidity of the way he introduced himself. "I'm Bruno, and what do you know?" Tosser. Anyways, ever since him Effs been a bit off, talking to Anthea about sins and shit. I even heard her say one night while I was listening from the stairs that she was afraid I might be going to Hell. I didn't catch much but I think I heard her say something about being gay. Great, I thought, it was her bloody idea and now she's telling everyone I'm gay! Whatever, I don't care what anyone thinks of me… just as long as Eff doesn't start being bitchy to me, we'll be alright.

Things straightened out pretty well though, after Bruno fucked off back to Jesus-ville and out of our lives. Effy was no longer up herself and we were back to our nightly routine of smoking spliff and laughing at our mothers' embarrassing habits.

One night we decided to hang out in my room instead (Effy said it was because she liked to look at my drawings, "some of them are sort of trippy" she had said.), and just as I lay down on the bed after finishing off the spliff, we heard creaking and muffled laughter from the other room. Mum and Anthea's room. It was 2am and they were usually asleep at this time. I sat back up and looked at Effy, she was staring back, her expression confused. We sat silently for a moment, listening. My eyes widened in horror when I heard a barely suppressed moan through the wall, Effy's eyes mirrored my own.

We both shot off the bed like it had suddenly become scalding and went to stand outside their bedroom door, being careful all the while not to make a sound. We stood silently there for several minutes, staring between each other and the door. I watched Effy's jaw drop slowly closer to the floor as she stood, shocked by what she was hearing. Mine, I knew, must be doing the same. What we were hearing was in no way expected! This couldn't really be happening, could it?

After several long moments, I finally shook enough of the shock from my body to be able to take the steps down the hall to Effy's room. I would have gone back to mine, but I did not want to hear any more of _that! _A few seconds later I heard the door click behind me and a small thud, signaling that Effy had followed and was leaning against the closed door. When I turned to look at her, I was slightly taken aback by her expression. She wasn't shocked, like I was. Her eyes had pooled tears and her cheeks were red. The corners of her mouth were scrunched up and pulled down. She was angry. I furrowed my brow and spoke.

"Eff?" she shot daggers at me, I took a step back, "You alright?"

She looked away a moment, took a deep breath, and then looked back at me, her eyes boring into me even more than before. I stepped back again.

"Am I alright!?" she practically screamed, "No, Naomi, I'm not bloody alright! My dad and my brother live in a shitty flat on the other side of town. I haven't seen Tony in three months! I can't ever spend any time in my living room because of your mother's cunting hippy meetings! Bruno broke up with me because I wouldn't stop talking to you. And now I'm apparently the only person in my house that isn't a fucking carpet muncher!"

I shook my head, stunned. Where had all that come from? I knew Mum's political meetings in the living room had been bothering Effy, hell they annoyed the shit out of me too! And I knew she missed Tony. But, Bruno? She told me she hated him. "He was a wanker, anyway. I only kept him around because he was a good shag." She had said. And, what!? She was the only person here who wasn't a what!? I distinctly remember several times in which she had fucking enjoyed 'carpet'! And need I remind her again that it was _her _idea!?

"Effy!" I began, ready to sort her good and proper, but she held up a hand.

She took a deep breath before speaking. "Don't Naomi, ok? I'm sorry, I know it was my idea. I just… fucking hell, she lied to me!" she spat out, plopping herself onto the bed and placing her face in her hands.

I furrowed my brow again. Well, that was unexpected. "What?"

She hugged her knees to her chest and looked up at me. "Mum," she said, the poison in her voice was now replaced with fatigue, "a few months ago I passed by the kitchen and I could have sworn I saw Gina kissing her. She told me I was being ridiculous and asked if I was on drugs. I kept trying to bring it up but she started snapping at me whenever I did, telling me to bugger off and stop behaving like a child."

I sat next to her on the bed and stared at my hands. "So this has been going on for a while, then?" I asked.

"Looks like it." Effy breathed. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a pack of fags. She lit two and placed one of them between my fingers. I took a long drag before replying.

"Why didn't they tell us?" I asked Effy, looking her in the eyes.

She shrugged. "Hence the anger." she said, "I told her I thought you might be gay once. Bruno was being a twat, telling me you were going to Hell and I didn't know what to do. I told her I liked Bruno but that I didn't think I could be with someone who couldn't accept my best friend… Anyway, when I spoke to her, I told her I didn't care if you were gay, so I don't know why she thinks I would care about her and Gina."

I sat silently for a moment, wondering which part of that to address. I had been wanting to talk to Effy about that conversation she had with Anthea, but that wasn't exactly the issue here. I decided to stay on track.

"Listen Eff," I said, "I don't like that they kept it from us either, but I'm sure they had a good reason. Maybe we should just leave it. If it's not just the same thing we were doing, maybe they'll tell us eventually." I didn't see how it could be the same thing we were doing if Effy had caught them kissing in the kitchen. Kisses are an act of affection, not lust. But I wanted to make Effy feel better, so I plastered my best smile on my face and took her hand.

She let out a deep sigh. "I suppose you're right." She said, "I guess it's none of my business anyhow. Alright, then, come on." She removed her jeans and bra and got into bed, she held up the duvet for me to slide in next to her. "You can stay in here tonight, I don't think you want to go back down the hall anytime soon." I smiled at her appreciatively before removing my own extra clothes and flipping off the light. I climbed in next to her.

"G'night, Nai." She said as she turned over and cuddled up with Pato, the funny giraffe.

I stared at the ceiling a moment before saying what was on my mind. "Eff?" I asked.

"Mm?" She replied, clearly already shutting herself down.

I turned to face her, propping myself up on my elbow. "Neither of us have slept with any girls besides each other, and that didn't mean anything." I began.

"Mhm," she said, telling me she was listening.

"And you're not gay. So… what makes you think I am?" I asked, really wanting to know.

Effy chuckled. "I don't know what I am, Naomi." She said, "but that doesn't matter. As for you, I thought you might be gay because I often catch you staring at that picture of Emily in my old yearbook."

Shit! I panicked. She'd caught me! How was I going to get out of this one? Suddenly it didn't matter as another question struck me.

"Wait," I said, "How do you know which one I was staring at? There are two of them."

Effy chuckled loudly this time and reached over into the drawer of her nightstand. She drew out a few pieces of paper that I recognized as some of my drawings. She handed them to me. I had drawn these a week after I had first seen the picture. I blushed as I realized the correlation. They were drawings of bows: red ones, blue ones, yellow ones, striped, polka dotted, checked, you name it. I had taken to scribbling these just about everywhere. I handed them back to her, looking sheepish.

As Effy replaced them in the drawer she spoke again. "There you have it, Campbell. If that isn't a crush I don't know what is." She smirked, "I must correct you on one thing, though, there are definitely not two of them! They look similar, sure, but Katie Fitch is definitely one of a kind. I can't speak for Em, though, don't really know much about her. She's always been pretty quiet."

Effy may not be able to speak for Emily, but I could. I may not know her, but if just a black and white photo of her could inspire me the way it did, she had to be something special. I smiled contentedly and turned to my other side.

"Night, Eff." I said.

"Night." She replied, a hint of amusement in her voice.

I drifted off to sleep once again with a black and white photo burned into my mind. I thought of what it would be like to get to know Emily. I wondered why she was quiet. I wanted to know everything there was to know about Emily Fitch.


	4. Roundview

Emily Fitch – 16 years old – Bristol

Here goes. Today is the first day at Roundview College. So far it's pretty much standing up to the brochure. It looks like a proper dump and that Doug guy is a real character. I scan my eyes around the bleachers we've been queued up on while I barely turn an ear to the woman standing in front of us telling us which form we'll be in. I had been staring blankly at a spot on the floor when a booming laughter pulled me out of my trance. I shook my head and looked forward at the woman again.

"Naomi Campbell?" she said, looking puzzled.

Jesus! I thought, wondering who the poor bitch was whose parents had been so careless. I looked around to see a blonde girl with her hand in the air. As her head slowly turned and I caught the grimace on her face; just barely though, because as soon as her eyes met mine, I lost all logical thought.

"Wow." I breathed out, not realizing I had said it out loud. Katie shuffled in her seat next to mine and I vaguely noticed she was following my gaze. Naomi gave me a small smile and my pulse picked up speed. I was shaken from my trance for the second time today by Katie's hand waving in front of my face.

"Ems!" she said, "Hello!? Snap out of it, lezzer bitch! We've gotta go to class." I rolled my eyes at my sister before standing up. I knew Katie didn't mean it to be cruel; she had been really cool about it, actually. She had kept schtum to Mum and she even tried to set me up with one of her friends once. I declined of course, as she was a ditsy cow, but it was sweet on Katie anyway. I chanced one last glance to Naomi, but she was already gone.

I followed Katie through the corridors and into our first lecture, Politics. I found a seat in the corner and waited for everyone to arrive. My eyes practically popped out of my head when I saw Naomi again, entering the room arm in arm with Effy, whom Katie and I had met in Primary. They were chatting animatedly about 'some twat' that was fucking off in the corridor. I learned who they were talking about just a second later when Cook entered the room. I grinned and rolled my eyes simultaneously. James Cook is the first boy I ever spoke to other than Dad and James (the other James, of course, my brother).

Katie and I were out at the park a week after our tenth birthday when Cook had approached me carrying what appeared to be a frozen sausage. He had a cheeky grin spread wide across his face.

"If this was my cock," he had said, holding out the sausage, "how much would you pay to eat it?"

I had scrunched up my nose in disgust and he had responded by throwing his head back and howling with laughter before turning on his heels and striding away. Since then the cheeky bastard had popped up randomly all over town, almost every time I left the house. It didn't take long for us to become friends. He may be a wanker but he has a soft side and I love him. He's my wanker.

"Emilio, Man!" He shouted as he launched himself at me and wrapped me in a tight hug, "How the fuck are ya!?"

I grinned up at him as I returned the hug. "Hi, Cook." I said simply. Before we had time to catch up a chubby bearded man entered the room. I assumed him to be our teacher. I was proven right a moment later when he spoke.

"Alright you lot," he began, "sit the fuck down and let's get started. According to this," he held up a paper book, "We have to go around the room, say our names and a unique fact about ourselves. I'll start. My name's Keiran, and I fucking hate teaching… You." He finished, pointing at Katie.

Here we go, I thought. We had done this a million times before and each time it was the same. Katie stood up.

"I'm Katie," she said, "I've never not had a boyfriend, since I was seven."

I rolled my eyes at Katie's double negative. "Congratulations." Keiran said, disinterestedly, "You." He pointed to me.

"I'm Emily," I said, repeating the usual routine, "I've never had a boyfriend."

"Shit happens," Keiran replied, with possibly even less interest before hailing another student. Effy introduced herself, followed by Cook and his best friend J.J. and Freddie. Keiran then pointed to Naomi, who was seated in the desk next to mine and right behind Effy. She stood and took a short breath.

"I'm Naomi," she said, her voice was almost musical, "I hate injustice. I moved here from London three years ago and I live with my best friend, Effy." She touched Effy's shoulder before sitting back down. The next few minutes passed quietly as Keiran started a dvd and everyone divided into their own whispered conversations. I tried not to stare, I really did, but I couldn't help it. She had such a pretty smile. I watched her chat happily to Effy for several minutes before I saw Effy pull a bottle of perfume from her bag.

I watched curiously as she handed it to Naomi. I wouldn't have thought anything of it if they both didn't look like they were up to something. Naomi pulled a lighter from her pocket and my eyes widened. Sure enough, a moment later she had flicked the lighter and was spraying the perfume through it, sending large flames dancing through the air. Cook howled with laughter which called Keirans attention to our direction. He simply grinned in response.

"Right," he said, "As much I'd love to allow you to enjoy your pyromania, uh… Naomi, was it?" She nodded. "…I'll have to ask you to put that away, lord knows fruit-bat here couldn't handle a catastrophe his first day." He gestured to J.J. as he spoke. Both J.J. and Naomi looked sheepish, but Naomi did as she was told and the class continued uneventfully.

During our lunch hour, Effy approached Katie and I with Naomi closely in tow looking nervous. Katie spotted Effy and quickly stood and walked away. They've hated each other for years… I think Effy stole her boyfriend or something. Whatever.

"Hi Emily," she said, looking bored. "Naomi here," she pointed over her shoulder, "wanted me to check and make sure she hadn't startled you with her pyro display earlier. I told her you probably didn't care but she was being a right git about it, so here I am."

I leaned over Effy's shoulder and spoke straight to Naomi. "No worries, it was rather amusing, actually," I said, grinning, wondering where my courage in the face of this angel was coming from, "And I don't bite you know, you can come closer." I could have sworn I saw her cheeks turn pink as she stepped forward.

"Hi." She said, awkwardly.

"Hello," I said, smile growing wider by the second, "perhaps I should be the one being so careful, you have already proven to be a bit of a danger, after all… setting fires in classrooms."

Her blush deepened; yep, definitely blushing. "Um… well… no. Honestly, I just wanted to see what Keiran would do. He didn't seem to care about anything so Effy and I made a wager of it. I said he would just make a joke about it and go back to picking at his nails; and Eff thought he would suddenly turn into a serious teacher and send me to Harriet. Turns out I was right." She smiled at Effy before turning her attention back to me.

"Congratulations," I said, "So no danger, good to know." I was beginning to worry what would happen to the both of us if her cheeks got any redder, or my smile got any wider. I continued. "So if you've lived here for three years, how come we've never met? You live with Effy so we should have attended the same school."

She nodded as if she had been waiting for the question to come up. "My old school in London placed me in a special program. They claimed I was 'gifted'. Mum was so proud." She placed her hands over her heart and pretended to sniffle. I assumed this was an impression of her mother and giggled. "…so when I got here they said I was way ahead of everything. The school offered for me to skip ahead but I wanted to stay with my age group. So they told me I could sit the exams and take summer courses to keep myself on track. Other than that they said I didn't have to attend. So I've been spending the past three years at protests with my mum and working part time stocking Tesco's."

I shook my head when I realized I had been staring at her lips as she spoke. It was my turn to blush. "Pretty and smart," It had slipped from my mouth before I could stop it. I scolded myself immediately. Naomi bit her lip and I melted. God, she's sexy! I scolded myself even more. Oh fuck, what am I doing!? I've only just met her, I don't even know if she's gay, and I'm already developing the biggest crush of my life!

Before I had time to apologize for my shameless flirting, the bell rang, signaling the next class. Katie was stood in the door way waving me over. "Come on, you dozy cow!" she yelled, "We've got to go!"

I turned back to Naomi and Effy and smiled. "Sorry," I said, "I've gotta go. I'll see you around?"

"Oh I'm sure you will," said Effy as she stared at Naomi with an amused grin. Naomi just blushed again and nodded sheepishly. I awarded them each a small smile, turned on my heels, and strode away. I blinked rapidly as I walked to try and clear the fuzziness in my head. What was this girl doing to me?

* * *

Naomi Campbell – 16 years old

Wow! That yearbook photo was nothing, absolutely nothing, compared to the real thing! Her hair was the most amazing shade of red, from the moment I saw it I felt like I was drowning in it. But her hair was easy to handle when compared to her eyes. Those deep brown pools made it impossible to form any coherent thought. I had to stare at her lips when I spoke to her in order for my brain to function. Of course, not that that was much better, as I found it very difficult to function properly when watching those as well. I have no idea how I'm going to get through the next two years with her around. I can't look at her for five seconds without my head swimming. What is this girl doing to me?

**AN: Hello everyone, I hope you're enjoying the story so far. I'm sure you're all happy that our girls have met, now! I know I am. Anyways, thanks for following. Please Review. :) See you next time. **


	5. The Fitch House

**AN: Hey guys! Sorry about the daylong delay. My girl was off work yesterday and well, she's just too sweet to ignore. So I took a break to spend time with her. We lied in bed for like four hours watching skins 3 though, so I guess I really wasn't that far away. ;) Ok, so... to address the reviews. About what Effy's problem is... I'm not sure how to go about addressing that one, but we'll get there eventually. You'll just have to wait and see where it goes. Also, I was asked in one of them if Naomi was going to be a twat at some point. I won****'t give away much, but what I will say is that there will be trouble between Naomily somewhere along the line. But who knows... maybe Emily will be the one who's a twat. *grins* But no worries. I promise a happy ending for all. :) Ok. Here it is, chapter 5. Hope you enjoy. See you next time. **

Naomi Campbell – 16 years old

The past few weeks have been amazing. Thanks to one Emily Fitch, Bristol is no longer the worst place ever! (Even if it is difficult to breathe when she's around) We have Politics and History together and ever since that first day we've sat together. She's easy to talk to and we've learned a lot about each other.

I've learned that she and Katie shared a room her whole life, up until about three months ago when Katie demanded she have her own space. They have a younger brother named James who, apparently, is a hopeless perv Her dad owns a local gym called Rob Fitch Fitness and her mum works at a beauty salon doing bikini waxes. I laughed when I learned their family motto, "Don't get fit, get Fitch". It was even more amusing when she told me how they were punished, growing up. Their dad would make them do pull ups on a bar hung in a doorway. He called it the naughty bar. Poor kids.

Their grandmother, "Mama Fitch" they call her, lives just around the corner from their house and Emily says she spends a lot of time there because she needs to get away from her mum and Mama Fitch is apparently the raddest gran ever. I don't like that Emily and her mum have problems. I hope things get better for her. Every time she talks about her mum she looks so broken. She says she can't tell her mum anything, that her mum would disown her.

"What could be so bad that your mum would disown you?" I had asked.

She smiled weakly, "Maybe one day I'll tell you." She replied. And I knew that was all I would get from her right now.

* * *

On my ride home this afternoon I couldn't stop thinking about Emily. She was so great to be around and college just wasn't enough. I wanted to spend more time with her. When I arrived home I pulled out my coursework and set to getting it done. It was hard to concentrate but I finally managed to finish it and lay back on my bed and thought of Emily some more. I wonder how she would react if I just showed up at her house. I knew where it was because I went cycling one day and passed by Katie snogging some bloke in the driveway. I thought about it a few more moments before making up my mind. I slipped on my trainers and a jacket and made my way through the front door and down the street.

About five minutes later I was stood outside the Fitch house. I stared at the door a moment, let out a deep sigh, and pressed my finger to the bell. The thirty seconds it took for someone to answer the door were probably the most nerve wracking thirty seconds of my life.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Katie said, sounding much ruder than I hope she meant to be.

"I… uh… hi!" I stuttered out, doing my best to plaster a smile over my shocked expression, "I came to see Emily, is she home?"

Katie stared at me for a moment like I had three heads before shrugging and walking back inside, leaving the door wide open. "Ems! Door!" I heard her shout a moment later, followed by a door slamming and music blaring throughout the house.

"Naomi!" Emily practically shouted as she rounded the corner and entered my line of vision. She had a grin a mile wide and I beamed at her. "How do you know where I live?"

"I'm not stalking you, I promise!" I chuckled, "I saw Katie outside when I was cycling one day, so that's how I knew. Anyways, I was bored at home so I thought it'd be nice to come see my newest friend."

Her cheeks turned slightly pink and she stepped aside, gesturing into the house. "Come on then," she said, "if you've come to hang then there's no sense in spending all evening on the front step, is there?"

I smiled shyly and stepped inside. The first thing I saw was a couch on the opposite wall with a small, sandy haired boy sprawled across it, snoring loudly. "James?" I said, giggling at the sight. Emily rolled her eyes as a response.

"You should be happy he's asleep," she said seriously, "half the things that come out of his mouth should be forbidden and capitally punishable." I chuckled again.

"Well I suppose I consider myself lucky, then." I said, and began scanning my eyes around the rest of the room. There was a television in front of me and alongside it was a large shelf full of DVDs. All of the decorations were somehow jungle related. There were ceramic elephants and cheetahs, on the back of the couch was draped a large cheetah print throw and there were exotic plants hanging from the ceiling. On top of the TV stand was a large, rocky fountain that added a rather relaxing soundtrack to the Fitch's living room. Ultimately, though, it was pretty tacky. Emily seemed to pick up on my distaste.

"Mum let Katie decorate it." She said, and gestured to the fountain, "I insisted on that, though. It's the only thing that makes this room worth being in. As you can see, I'm not the only person who finds it relaxing." I chuckled again as she picked up a nearby pillow and threw it at James' head. He didn't stir an inch.

"Come on then." She said, and led the way down a narrow hallway, closer to the sounds of Katie's blaring music. "Don't worry; it won't be so loud once we're in my room."

Once in Emily's room, I couldn't contain the smile that spread across my face. Just like in my own room, her art was plastered all over the walls. But they were very different from my own. Where I had taken to creating landscapes and cartoon-like figures of people in various positions, Emily's drawings were all of animals. The one that stood out most was an acrylic painting of two wolves stood facing one another in a marvelously green forest. It was beautiful. When I snapped out of my trance, Emily was staring at me shyly.

"They're amazing." I told her, honestly, and frowned when she scoffed at me disbelievingly. "Really!" I pointed at the painting I had been staring at, "Especially the wolves, they're beautiful." She smiled shyly and sat down on the bed.

"Well, I think I'm a bit rubbish… but thanks." She said, staring at her hands.

I shook my head and plopped down next to her. "You're not." I said simply before leaning back and rummaging in my pocket. A second later I pulled out a metal case and slid back to sit cross-legged on the bed. I opened the case, pulled out my prize, and placed the case down in front of me. Emily followed my example and sat in front of me, mirroring my position. I held up my prize.

"Spliff?" I asked, grinning from ear to ear. Again, she mirrored me, but then quickly jumped up off the bed.

"Just a sec." she said, and I watched her curiously. She picked up a dirty towel off the floor and rolled it up, she stuffed it in front of the crack in the door. She then walked over to the window and opened it a crack; she peeked her head out the window and back in. Finally, she stepped up and stood on the bed, reaching above her head to an air vent; she slid it closed and then sat back down in one swift and graceful motion.

She grinned at me, "Carry on." She said. I cocked an eyebrow at her to which she only smiled wider. I shrugged, brought the spliff to my lips, and lit it. I took two long drags and passed it over to Emily.

"Paranoid, much?" I asked as she inhaled deeply. She shook her head in reply, waiting until she had completed her exhale before speaking.

"Mum would have a cow," she explained, "she's a bitch enough as it is without me giving her a reason to be."

I frowned at her, immediately feeling guilty for causing the conversation. Even if I did have no way of knowing, I still felt bad. She always looked so hurt when she talked about her mum. Even if it was something little like this. In that moment, I swore to myself that one day I would get her to tell me about her mum, and I would do all I could to help. But for now, I would change the subject.

"So tell me, Em," I said, plastering on the best smile that I could, "what else don't I know about you?" I placed a finger over my lips and hummed, like I was pondering something. "I won't torture you with the completely unimportant favorite color question… how about… ah! Music! Got any favorites, there?"

The mood had successfully changed. She was smiling. I smiled back, proudly and awaited an answer. She bit her lip in her adorable way and stared at the ceiling, thinking.

"Chicago." She said, pointedly, and I can't deny that I was slightly taken aback.

"Really!?" I asked.

"What, you don't like them?" she asked, looking a bit injured. I corrected my mistake immediately.

"No, no, I do!" I said and shrugged sheepishly, "I guess I just didn't peg you as an 80's fan. So what's your favorite single, then? …by Chicago, of course."

She pondered again a moment before answering, "Hard to Say I'm Sorry." She said.

I smiled. "Good one," I said, "any particular reason?"

She shrugged. "Probably," she said, and smiled, "I just don't know what it is." We laughed together. "So, how about you? Which Chicago single is your favorite?"

"Easy," I said, "You're the Inspiration"

She snorted loudly.

"Oi!" I shouted, poking her in the ribs.

She giggled hysterically for a moment and I waited for her to catch her breath. Ticklish then, I grinned and made a mental note.

"No, it's just…" she took one last deep breath to compose herself, "It's just. God, we're a couple of soppy twats, aren't we?"

I thought for a moment and realized she was right. We had both picked a painfully soppy love song. The blush that crept across my face was unavoidable. That's just great, isn't it? The moment you realize you're a hopeless romantic is in the face of the most beautiful girl on the planet!

We talked for hours about nothing and everything. It wasn't until my eyes started to flutter closed that I realized how late it was getting.

"Oh, bollocks!" I said, "I've gotta go!"

Emily turned her attention to the digital alarm clock on her night stand. "Shit!" she said, "When did that happen?"

I grinned broadly at her before getting to my feet, "Dunno." I said, and shrugged.

She shuffled herself up as well and she walked me to the door.

"Thanks for coming over, Nai," she said, smiling up at me, "I had a lot of fun."

"Yeah," I said, suddenly feeling really nervous, "Me too." I smiled.

"Well… see you." She said, she looked nervous too and she was hoping from foot to foot.

"Yeah… see you." I said and prepared to turn toward the door. But before I knew it, Emily had her arms wrapped around my neck, pulling me into a firm hug. Once the shock wore off, I hugged back, wrapping my own arms around her waist and gripping tightly. Her hair smelled amazing, and she felt so good in my arms. I held the embrace much longer than I should have before finally letting go and stepping out onto the step.

"Bye." I said, hoping the dark would hide the blush in my cheeks.

"Bye." She replied. And she closed the door between us.

I let out a deep sigh I didn't even know I was holding and started down the driveway. I pulled out my fags and lit one, hoping the simple act of smoking would help to clear my head of all the things running through it. Just as I reached the end of the driveway, though, I was called back.

"Naomi, wait!" Emily called after me, running to meet me in the driveway. I stopped and turned on my heels.

"Sorry," Emily said, "I just wanted to ask you if you wanted to do something again. Katie is going out of town with Mum this weekend for some seminar and Dad is in London until Tuesday; he's going to try and open a new gym there. So James and I are staying at Mama Fitch's until they get back. She keeps telling me I should bring friends round and I thought, maybe you could? She's got a huge house so you can stay in your own room and everything. I know you're used to having your own space and all."

My smile grew wide and I had to try very hard not to let my excitement show. "Yeah!" I said, a bit too enthusiastically, "That would be great."

She beamed. "Sorted," she said. She hugged me tightly once more before standing up on her tiptoes and kissing me on the cheek. My skin burned where her lips had touched and my heart skipped a beat. "See you then." She said, and skipped back into the house, leaving me alone with my thoughts once again. I was struck dumb, staring at the door Emily had just vanished behind for several long minutes. When I looked down my cigarette had burned down to the filter and was dangling dead in my hand. I reached in my pocket and lit another. I walked silently home, and collapsed in bed. I drifted off to sleep within minutes. I dreamt of deep brown eyes, bright red hair, and a husky voice.


	6. The Sunset

Emily Fitch – 16 years old

The last bell of the day rang throughout the corridors and I ripped out of the classroom door to find Naomi. I wouldn't have to do this, of course, if I hadn't been too thick to remember to get her number. She's agreed to accompany me to Mama Fitch's for the weekend, so I have to find her so that we can walk over together. I'm stood by her usual afternoon smoking spot when I see her approaching. She's locked arm in arm with Effy as they stroll towards me and I feel a strange prickle of jealousy rising up my throat. I swallow it back down and smile at the two of them.

"Hi, Eff," I wave, dismissively, before turning my attentions to my blonde bombshell. "Hey, Nai," I grin, "So, we're due at Mama Fitch's in about two hours. Do you have your stuff or do we need to make a stop by your house?"

Effy scans her eyes over the two of us like we're speaking another language. "Sorry, what?" She says, looking straight at Naomi.

"Oh shit," Naomi hits her forehead with her palm, "Sorry, Eff. I forgot to tell you didn't I? Ems asked me to spend the weekend with her at her grans."

Effy looked upset for a moment, but quickly regained her composure. "Cool." She said, simply before turning gracefully and walking away.

I stared after her for a moment, puzzled, but turned my attention back to Naomi in a second. "She alright?" I asked.

Naomi nodded as she bit the inside of her lip. "Yeah," she answered, "She's just been having some problems with her mum, I think. She doesn't like being in the house when I'm gone. I feel awful I forgot to warn her."

I nodded. I can completely understand what it's like not wanting to be alone with your mother. "Do you want to do this another time?" I asked, hoping the answer would be no.

She shook her head so hard I thought it might fall off. "Of course not!" she said, "She'll be alright. We're gonna need to run by and get my things, I'll just leave her some extra spliff to help her get through it."

I grinned widely and nodded again. "Sorted, then!" I straightened my bag on my shoulder and held out my arm, gesturing toward the sidewalk. "Lead the way, Miss Campbell."

She scrunched up her nose at me and followed that with a heart stopping grin before turning on her heels. She began walking toward a bike rack and I stopped short when I saw her lean down to unlock one of the chains.

"Shit." I said, "I didn't know you had your bike. I don't want you to have to wheel that all the way home. I can call Mama Fitch to pick us up, if you want. I'm sure she wouldn't mind."

Naomi had placed her bike chain into her bag and was now straightening it over her shoulders. She grinned at me again. "Don't be silly, Fitch. I'm not wheeling anything. You're getting a backy." She pointed to a set of bmx pegs sticking out from her back wheel. My eyes widened and her grin broadened. She gestured to my bag. "Now slip on that other shoulder strap and hop on. We've only got two hours and I'm feeling a bit peckish. I'd like a spot to eat before we head to your grans."

I took a deep breath as I pondered whether or not I should protest. I decided she probably wouldn't take no for an answer and shrugged in defeat. I did as instructed and sorted out my shoulder straps. Naomi had already swung her leg over her bike and was waiting patiently for me to climb on. She held it steady as I stepped onto the pegs, all the while keeping a tight grip on Naomi's shoulders.

"You all set?" She asked, looking over her shoulder. I nodded, trying not to let my anxiety show. She placed a hand over mine for a moment and then placed it back on the handlebars. "Don't worry," she said, "I'll take care of you." She then pushed off the ground, propelling us forward, and began pedaling.

My grip tightened on her shoulders and I heard her giggle through the wind in my ears. The ride to Naomi's house was stressful, to say the least, and I was thankful when we came to a stop outside a red door. "Here we are." She said, watching me with amusement as I stepped off with shaky legs.

I tried my best to scowl at her. "You're not going to make me do that on the way to Mama Fitch's are you?" I asked. She chuckled in response.

"Nah." She said, "We'll walk. I wouldn't want you to lose your afternoon snack, now would I?" She smirked at me as she opened the front door.

"Mum!? Eff!? Anthea!?" she shouted as we made our way up the stairs. "Guess they're not home, yet." She said when no one answered, and then mumbled something under her breath. I'm not sure but I'm pretty sure it was 'As long as they're not fucking again.' I quickly brushed it aside, though, deciding that I didn't want to know.

"You have a lovely house." I said, absentmindedly, as my eyes scanned around.

"Yeah, well, technically it's Anthea's," she said, "Mum and I just live here. But it's enough like home, I suppose."

I nodded, understandingly. I had only known Naomi a couple of months but I already knew one thing for sure. And that was that Naomi liked her space.

A moment later, Naomi had stepped into a room and waved her hand behind her head, gesturing for me to join her. I creeped in slowly behind her and my eyes were met, instantly, with Naomi's artwork. It cluttered every centimeter of her walls. I scanned over them all in awe, until my eyes fell on one particular painting. I held back the tears that were prickling behind my eyes. I wasn't sure why the painting was affecting me so much; all I knew for sure is that it was beautiful.

The painting was as big as your average poster and was hung right in the center of the wall opposite the bed. It was of a beach at sunset. There was a hut in the corner of the picture and it, as well as the sand and palm trees, was completely black. All the color in the picture came from the sunset. There were so many colors blended into it I couldn't begin to name them all, but it was dominantly orange. The way the colors blended told me that the work had been done in watercolor.

As I stared, I felt a lonely tear fall down my cheek and I wiped it away, swiftly, hoping that Naomi hadn't noticed. When I turned to check I realized that she had been watching me. I felt instantly concerned when I saw her expression. She looked sad. I opened my mouth to ask if she was ok, but she had already begun to explain.

"It's a small beach in the Bahamas, mostly only used by locals," she explained, "My dad took me on holiday there when I was eleven. We stayed for a week and he would take for a walk down the beach every night at sunset. Then when we went inside, he would make supper while I sat at the table and watched and he would tell me stories while he cooked. He would tuck me in at night and would sing me a song with his guitar before kissing my head and leaving me to sleep."

She paused for a long moment, never looking up from where her face had fallen, staring at her hands in her lap. I saw tears fall through the air and land on her fingers and a fresh set of tears welled up in my own eyes as a result.

"That's the last good memory I have of him." She continued, "A few days after we got back from holiday I came in from school to find him and mum screaming at each other. I don't remember what they were fighting about, but they fought all the time after that. I saw him hit Mum once, a week before we moved here, actually. They had been shouting at each other for nearly two years and I just couldn't take it anymore. So I went to intervene and just as I stepped into the room he slapped her in the face, hard. I wouldn't talk to him when he tried to apologize. You can't explain away something like that. I'll never forgive him. But that painting," she looked up at me as she pointed to it, "that's who my dad was. I don't know what happened to him when we got back from that holiday, but he wasn't the same person."

She let the rest of her tears pour out freely and then wiped her eyes, chuckling at herself.

"Sorry." She said, simply.

I shook my head at her as I walked over and knelt in front of her. I wrapped my arms around her and rubbed her back.

"Don't be ridiculous." I said, "Everyone is entitled to having a few problems. Lord knows I've got a few of my own."

She chuckled and squeezed me tightly. "Thanks, Em." She said, "You're amazing, you know?"

I beamed at her, seizing my opportunity to lighten to mood. "Well, I try." I said, playfully, and felt quite proud of myself when my plan worked and she chuckled.

"Alright," she said, taking a deep breath and shifting away from me and off the bed, "Just let me get a few things in my knapsack and then I can fix us a spot of grub before we go."

I snorted as my stomach grumbled, loudly. "Sounds good," I chuckled, "apparently I'm famished!"

Once Naomi had sorted out her overnight bag and left a skillfully rolled joint on Effy's pillow, we went downstairs and into the kitchen. Naomi made us each a turkey and cheese sandwich with lettuce and mayo and we ate quietly and happily. Once we had tucked in, Naomi scooped up her bag and we were out the door again with only 15 minutes to spare.

Luckily Mama Fitch's house was only a 10 minute walk from Naomi's and we arrived just in time to catch Mama Fitch pulling into the driveway with James in the passenger seat. I beamed proudly at them before turning to Naomi and nearly bursting with laughter at her reaction to my grandmother. This weekend was going to be fun.

**AN: Alright so, this chapter was supposed to be about spending the weekend with Mama Fitch, but... what can I say? I got carried away. Sorry. :/ It's ok, though, because I think it would be far more fun to see Mama Fitch from Naomi's POV. So, next stop, Mama Fitch's house. Hope you all enjoyed this chapter and I hope you like Mama Fitch in chapter 7. See you next time. :)**


	7. Mama Fitch's: Part One

**AN: Hello, friends. :) So it's time to meet Mama Fitch. She doesn't have such a big role right now but I promise we'll be seeing more of her later. Anyways, I think you'll love her. I had a different plan for this chapter, but I got carried away again. Sometimes the stories just write themselves. :) So I've now made it into a two part chapter and I can promise you that part two will definitely be one to look forward to. So, anyways, here's part one. I've got about three hours til my girl gets home, hopefully that will be enough time to write part two and get it on here. If not, I promise I won't make you wait too long. Alright, presenting Mama Fitch's house. Hope you enjoy. See you next time. :)**

Naomi Campbell – 16 years old

We were stood outside a large white house with a yard the size of a football pitch (and no, not American football, she's not the bloody queen) when a car came screeching past us and into the driveway. We didn't need to wait for them to even be in sight to notice them as there was a loud techno beat pumping out of it that could probably be heard from my house.

When the car came to a complete stop in front of us and the noise ceased I turned my head, slowly, to look at Emily. The second she met my gaze she snorted loudly and doubled over. After the minute it took her to compose herself she straightened back up and beamed at me.

"Told you she wasn't your typical gran." She said, and shrugged as if the sort of thing happened every day. But then, I suppose, for her, it did. "Come on then," she grabbed my hand and dragged me toward the car, "time to meet her."

We were just steps away when the infamous Mama Fitch closed the door to her automobile and turned to face us. She had a kind face and I instantly felt comfortable in her presence, which is nothing like what I was expecting. I was quickly ripped from my comfort zone, however, when I was pulled into a bone crushing hug by the older woman. When she released me, I fought hard to collect myself and plastered my best 'this-isn't-awkward-at-all' smile on my face. I must not have done very well.

"Oh, come now," said Mama Fitch, "Don't you worry your pretty little head. We're all about having fun here at the Fitch Manor, aren't we, darlings?" she looked to her grandchildren for confirmation. Emily smiled widely and James, I had just noticed, was in his own world (a world that apparently, existed somewhere in the vicinity of my tits). Emily spotted his gawking and clipped him round the ear.

"You're drooling, perv." She said, eyeing him with disgust. He shook his head roughly to pull from his trance and rubbed his ear. He scowled at Emily and then looked to his grandmother as if asking for assistance. Mama Fitch just shook her head at him.

"Don't look at me, James." She said, holding up her hands, "you deserved that one." She beamed around at the three of us before straightening her bag on her shoulder, turning on her heels, and heading up towards the house. "Come on then." She called after us, and we all followed.

We stepped in the front door and were met with, by far, the most incredible house I had ever seen. The ceiling was high and from it hung a magnificent chandelier. Beneath our feet was a black marble floor and the walls were filled with paintings that must have cost a fortune. I could see part of the kitchen straight ahead and to the right there was a room with a piano. I smiled at the thought of letting Emily hear me play and turned my attention back to the people stood around me.

"Right, then." Said Mama Fitch, looking directly at me, "I'm sure Emily's already told you that I'm not the most conventional of grandmothers but let me just clear up exactly what that means. You two are sixteen and as far as I'm concerned you can do whatever you bloody well like, the only thing I ask is that you keep me posted. I don't like surprises. And while you are here, moderation on alcohol and spliff, please. In my house you can have plenty of fun without needing to be off your tits. The refrigerator is full and you're welcome to anything. Emily," she turned to face her, "Don't forget to give me a ring in James is in your hair and I'll find something to entertain him. It wouldn't harm you to spend some time together but after him perving on your friend, here; I wouldn't expect that of you this time round."

Emily smirked at her little brother and bent down to hug him. "You know I love your wormy ass." She said, and then kissed him on the cheek. I smiled at the show of affection and wondered, briefly, what my life would have been like if I had had a little brother. She ruffled his hair and turned to her grandmother. She hugged her and kissed her cheek as well. "Right, well, I know you two should have a film to get to, so we'll be out of your hair. Which room am I to show Naomi to?"

Mama Fitch answered with the name of someone I could only assume was a family member before they said their goodnights and Emily and I were left standing alone in the foyer. Emily waved for me to follow her and headed up the stairs. I tried not to look around too much on the way as I didn't want to waste time gawking at magnificent artwork and interior design. It wasn't too hard, actually, as I was much more interested in watching the way Emily's hips swung tu and fro as she walked ahead of me.

Emily stopped and opened a door and I followed her through it. "So, you'll be sleeping here." She smiled at me and stood to the side so that I could pass her and place down my things. I placed my bag on the floor next to the bed and scanned my eyes around the room. There was a large flat screen television on the dresser, the bed was king sized and had a starry canopy draped from its four posts, a full length mirror stood in the far left corner, and most impressive was that this room had its own lou. I ran past Emily, into the room, and flipped on the light.

"Jesus!" I shouted, and Emily chuckled from where she was now standing in the doorway. The tub was big enough to fit three people and it had jets!

"Pleased, then?" she asked, and I nodded in response.

"Mama Fitch really knows how to make a guest feel welcome!" I said. She beamed at me.

"Glad you like it!" she said, "But you'll have to take advantage of your luxuries later. Don't forget you're here to hang out with me. I can't have you ignoring me to wank off in my gran's ridiculously awesome tub."

Little did Emily know that wanking in that tub couldn't exactly be considered ignoring her.

"Wouldn't dream of it." I smiled at her, "So, what do you have planned for me first, Ms. Fitch?"

She grinned and left the bathroom, stopping only when she reached the bedroom door. She placed her hand on the doorknob and turned to face me.

"Put on something comfortable." she said, "We'll be up late. There's lots to do round here but tonight I'm feeling pretty chilled out so I was thinking we could just hang out back and chat. But first, I saw you eyeing that piano! Something you wish to tell me, Campbell?"

I grinned widely. "Oh, Emsy, you don't think I would keep any secrets from you, do you? Of course I was going to show you. Just let me change into something loose like I've been told and then I'd be happy to play something for you."

She scowled at my comment about her giving me orders but then smiled and left, closing the door behind her. I quickly changed into a pair of grey sweatpants and a baggy white t-shirt with a pig on the front of it. It was the most ridiculous piece of clothing I owned but it was comfortable, so I wore it to bum around in. I ran a brush through my hair and put it into a messy bun on the back of my head. I put on a pair of socks to keep my feet warm and stepped out of the room.

Emily was stood, leaning against the wall, directly across from the door. She began giggling manically when she saw me.

"What in the hell is that?" she pointed to my shirt. I pretended to be offended.

"I'll have you know this shirt is very comfortable!" I said, sticking my nose in the air snobbily.

She grinned. "It's cute." She said and her eyes glazed over a bit when she said it.

I felt my knees go weak and was thankful that my hand was still on the doorknob. I prayed to every god that the blush that was burning my cheeks wasn't visible in the dim light of the hallway. I took a deep breath and recaptured my balance.

"Right," I said, "Time to see if my music can make you as emotional as my art."

I practically ran past Emily and down the stairs toward the piano. One, because I always got excited in the face of a high quality instrument; and two, because I don't think I could've handled another second of Emily looking at me like that without melting into a puddle on the floor.

I sat at the piano and lifted the lid. This was definitely the most expensive piano I would ever have the opportunity to play and I wondered briefly where Mama Fitch got all her money. I didn't wonder long though as I didn't really care. Being Emily's friend gave me the opportunity to hang out here and that was good enough for me!

I listened closely for Emily coming down the stairs. She had gentle footsteps and I could only barely make them out. As soon as I heard the sound change from the muffled brush of carpet to the light slap of bare skin against marble, I began to play.

I could've played something famous, just to impress Emily, but she had already become so valuable to me, and she was worth more than that. I felt like she could see me more clearly than anyone I'd ever known, and because of that, I didn't want to hide any part of me. So I played the one song I had ever come up with on my own. I had never written it down because I didn't need to, I would remember it forever.

I knew it was risky the moment I hit the first note and I felt the emotion start pour out of me like it always did, but I kept playing. I had told myself that I wanted Emily to know everything about me, and I wasn't going to go back on that now, so I let go and let the music take me over. When I finished I breathed deeply and slowly let the real world come back to me. I felt the same impenetrable calm that I felt after every time I played my song as I turned to face Emily.

If I thought the look in her eyes had hit me hard before, it was nothing compared to this. She was staring so hard at me I thought her eyes might burn right through me. I vaguely noticed the tear streaks on her face and the wet ring that had formed around the collar of her shirt. When I let myself really look at her eyes, I was taken aback by what I found there. Staring back at me from those deep pools of brown was nothing but pure, unadulterated admiration.

My head swam as I looked back at her, the longer I let my eyes meet her own, the fuzzier my mind became. I forced myself to look away as I realized I had stopped breathing and took several deep breaths to return myself to normal. When I allowed myself to look back at Emily, I was relieved to find that her eyes had softened into something my own could meet without being life threatening. I gulped and bit my lip.

"Say something," was the only thing I could come up with to say.

Emily smiled, staring at a place on the floor. She was thinking about something. After a very long moment, she looked back up at me, biting her own lip. She let out a low chuckle as she said,

"Alright, this has to be a dream. Is there anything about you that isn't perfect?"

I almost frowned. What was so good about me? I'm far from perfect; I'm just Naomi. But I smiled instead as my pulse picked up speed. I may not be perfect, but the fact that Emily thought I was made my heart do backflips. I wondered how much longer I would be able to keep my feelings from bubbling up. Emily was doing things to me that I had never experienced before, and I think she likes me back, but how can I be sure? Emily Fitch, you'll be the death of me.


	8. Mama Fitch's: Part Two

**AN: Here we are folks, part two. *grins* Enjoy! :)**

Naomi Campbell – 16 years old

I was smiling goofily at Emily for several minutes and when she started giggling at me my cheeks turned pink, which only seemed to spur her on more. She held out a hand to me.

"Come on then, Wonder Woman," she said, "time to show you one of my talents."

I grabbed her hand and allowed her to pull me up from my seat on the piano stool. She led me into the kitchen, grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge, handed one to me and continued through the kitchen and out a door leading to the back yard. She sat me down on a bench swing that sat on a stone patio, facing toward the yard. There was a trampoline with a large net on one end of the yard and on the other there was a large, in ground swimming pool with lights under the water that illuminated most of the yard.

Emily walked away from me and over toward the pool. She disappeared into a small shed that was next to it. I saw a light flick on through its small window. The lights from the pool flicked off, followed by the lights on the patio behind me. After a moment, I watched Emily emerge from the shed carrying two chains, a small box, and a portable radio. She flicked the light off inside the shed and the yard was plunged into complete darkness.

A moment later she appeared in front of me and placed down her load on the patio. She fiddled with the radio a moment, her face illuminated in the darkness by the lit screen of a tiny iPod she had plugged into it. She placed the iPod down on top of the radio and turned to her small box. I watched curiously as she rummaged inside it. She took out two white things that, to me, would look like marshmallows if they weren't square. She attached one of these marshmallow things to the end of each of her chains and covered them with some sort of fluid from her box, all the while being careful not to let the fluid touch her hands.

She then stood up and started stretching out her arms and legs. She jumped up and down a few times and then picked up her chains. Each chain had a small loop at the end, which she looped around her fingers. She scanned her eyes on the ground around her and pursed her lips as if she had lost something. I took the opportunity to have a fag while she searched for whatever she was missing. As I flicked my lighter and held it to the tip of my cigarette, Emily chuckled.

"You have impeccable timing, Naomi!" She said, grinning broadly, "That's just what I was looking for. May I?"

I held up my lighter to confirm what she had meant and she nodded. I handed it over to her and she smirked at me. I briefly wondered what she was up to, but it didn't take long to get my answer as she flicked on the lighter and held each of her marshmallow things in the flame, one by one. My eyes widened as tennis ball sized fireballs emerged from the ends of the chains that hung from Emily's hands.

She grinned broadly again as she placed both chains in one hand for a moment and bent down to hit play on her iPod. The first beats of the techno song started to pump through the speakers of the radio and Emily stepped away from me, into the yard. She replaced her chains to their proper position in both hands and held them up to the side of her face so that I could see her wicked grin. She stared at me a long moment and I still wondered what she was going to do. Seconds later all the air left my lungs.

Emily was wrapped in a constantly moving swirl of light. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I watched in awe as she twisted and turned her arms around her body, the flames from her chains spinning right along with them. She made shapes and patterns that glowed brightly around her. I sat slack jawed as she began doing flips and twirling her body around, all the while keeping the flames swirling around her. When the song came to a stop, she slowed her spinning until the two flaming orbs came to rest at her sides. As another song started to play, Emily walked towards me. She looked like she was bubbling with energy.

"It's an amazing feeling!" she stated, matter-of-factly. I nodded.

"That was incredible!" I said, "I can only imagine what it would feel like to be in the middle of all of that." She stared at me a moment with pursed lips and then nodded.

"Do you trust me?" she asked. I looked up at her curiously. What did she mean? She repeated her question once more and I nodded.

"Of course I trust you." I said. She stared into my eyes for a moment as if looking for confirmation there and nodded. She placed both chains into one hand again and grabbed my hand with the other, pulling me up. She led me onto the grass and removed her hand from mine, placing it on my shoulder.

"Stay there." She said, "Don't move a muscle." I obeyed and watched her as she stepped back and started spinning her flames to the music once more. Slowly, she stepped closer to me and as she moved I could feel the heat coming from the ends of her chains getting warmer with every step. The flames were now only inches from my body, but I stood, stiff as a board. I wanted to show Emily that I trusted her.

Suddenly, Emily's arms swung out wide and she took one vast step, closing the space between us. Her arms were still moving on either side of my face. I tilted my head back just a fraction and Emily's flames were dancing their way around us, enveloping us both in their glow. The feeling truly was magnificent. It felt like we were wrapped in a ball of energy; the energy of the flame circling around us and our own energies blended in the centre. It felt like gravity had ceased to exist and it was just me and Emily, floating around in our own beautiful, glowing bubble.

When the music slowed, once again, so did Emily. Her chains stopped spinning and she stepped back and blew out the flames. Our bubble burst and I came down from my high, catching my breath.

"So?" Emily asked, grinning at me over her shoulder as she bent down to turn off the music.

A breathy "Wow" was all I could manage. She chuckled.

"See?" she smirked at me, "You're not the only one with incredible talents" She grinned proudly at herself and I giggled in response.

"Definitely incredible." I agreed. Emily winked at me before scooping up her things and heading back to the shed to put them away. Within a moment, all of the lights had come back on and Emily was reappearing from behind the door. She waved a hand at me and began walking toward the trampoline. A second later we were both climbing onto it.

Once on, I laid back at stared at the sky. The sky here was open and clear, I wished my house was like this. There are too many trees around and you can hardly even see the stars.

"So when did you learn to do that?" I asked Emily as she lied down next to me.

"I've been doing it with light sticks since I was ten," she said, "One of the regulars at Dad's gym did it and I asked him to show me how. I had never even thought about doing it with fire until the first day of college, actually. You know, when you set of that little flame thrower in class? You said that you thought fire was pretty and it made me wonder if I could do my light dances with fire. I went online and found this website all about fire-dancing. So I did some reading and then decided to give it a shot. I'm hooked now, obviously."

I smiled brightly to myself. She had started using fire because I had said it was pretty. I wondered if I would ever tell her how much inspiration she had been to my art and music.

"So, Fitch," I questioned, "got any more surprises up your sleeve?"

She smiled. "Whatever you want to know, you need only ask." She sat up on her elbow and looked me in the eye. Her smile dropped just a tiny bit. "I'll tell you anything." She said.

That last bit had meaning behind it, I could tell. She wanted me to know something. But she would only tell me if I asked. I stared back into her eyes. The same adoration I had seen earlier was back, but it wasn't alone. There were other emotions there this time: anxiousness, questioning, and… desire? Was I right in thinking that Emily might like me back? Should I just ask her? What if she's, like, homophobic or something? Not that I would call myself gay… I don't know what I am, really. I do know for sure, though, that I like Emily, a lot. That much I will never doubt.

I took a deep breath and let it out to prepare myself. I'd never know if I didn't ask, would I? Here goes everything.

"Em?" I asked, cautiously. She furrowed her brow at me.

"Yeah?" she asked, never removing her eyes from my own.

"Have you ever, like… liked another girl? Like… romantically?" I stammered out and held my breath, hoping with all my heart that she didn't think I was a freak for asking. She continued to stare into my eyes and let out a deep breath before she looked down at her hands. She twisted her fingers around themselves, nervously.

"Yeah." She said, in an almost whisper. I released the breath I had been holding but when I tried breathing in again the air felt thick and I could only take shallow breaths. I noticed my pulse was starting to climb. I was so thankful that Emily hadn't seen me as a freak, but now there was no turning back. Now I had started the conversation, I had to tell her how I feel. There was no way out now… but maybe I could put it off another few minutes?

"Have you ever kissed a girl?" I asked. Mainly just to postpone the inevitable, but also because I did really want to know. Her eyes met mine again and she looked relieved. Had she been expecting me to react badly?

"Yeah." She said, again, with more confidence this time. "What about you?" she added.

"To both questions?" I asked. She nodded in response. I nodded as well. "Effy and I have slept together before." Emily's eyes widened. "Not like that, though. We would be high and horny and it would just kind of happen. She's beautiful and everything, but I just don't feel that way about her, you know?"

I looked in Emily's eyes and she appeared to understand. She nodded to confirm it. I continued. "I have had feelings for another girl, though… just one." I said, staring into those deep brown orbs. Emily stared back for a long time before saying anything.

"And what about now?" she asked, "Do you like anyone now?" I gulped. Here it was. The question I could no longer hide from. I was now the one fiddling with my hands and hiding my eyes.

"Yeah." I echoed Emily's earlier response at the same volume. My lips started to twitch up and when I looked back at Emily I noticed hers doing the same.

"Anyone I know?" she asked. Her lips twitched up slightly more and I had the feeling she already knew what I wanted to tell her. A full smile broke onto my face and I nodded.

"Someone you know rather well, actually." I joked. Her smile broke as well but disappeared a moment later and she looked at me seriously.

"I like you too." She said. I looked down at my hands again to hide my blush before looking back up at her. I nodded and stared into her eyes once again. We shared the gaze for several long minutes before Emily threw her head back and let out a deep sigh. I continued to stare at her, confused.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Emily shifted her body so that she was lying on her stomach, still facing me. She looked up at me a moment and then hung her head between her shoulders. She was quiet for several long minutes before speaking, still not looking up at me.

"I… I want to…" she let out a deep sigh again and shook her head, "I want to kiss you." She said, finally. She still didn't look up at me. I reached over and stroked the hair from her face. She looked up and I tucked it behind her ear. I stared at her a long moment.

"I wouldn't mind." I said, simply. She blushed, but didn't look away. I smiled at her and it broke the spell. She shuffled her body again so that she was sitting cross-legged. She looked away from me again.

"I'm scared." She said, still looking away, after another long silence. I sat myself up and mirrored her position.

"Em?" I asked, getting her to look at me, "What are you scared of?"

She didn't answer, just looked away again. I sat, silently watching her for a long time. I wanted to kiss her, too. But she was scared. What was she scared of? I couldn't let her be afraid of this. This was good. I could feel it. But I wasn't sure what I could do. My brain was too fuzzy. I needed to clear my head if I was going to figure this out. I crawled over to Emily, squeezed her hand and kissed the top of her head.

"I'm gonna step off and have a fag, ok?" I said. She nodded and I did as I said I would. Just as I was putting out my cigarette, I looked up to see Emily approaching. She was rubbing her arms and her jaw was clenched tight.

"It's cold." She said, "Would you mind if we went to bed now?"

I shook my head to let her know it was fine and I took her hand and led her inside. When we got upstairs, I didn't know which room was hers, so I just walked her along to mine and we stood outside the doorway.

"Goodnight." I said, a bit disappointed that we hadn't kissed. But she was scared, and I didn't want to pressure her. She stared at me for a long time.

"Goodnight." She said. She sounded defeated. I looked in her eyes and could tell she still wanted to kiss me, but she was frozen on the spot. Every muscle in her body was tense. I went to step away but she grabbed my hand. There was only one way to do this, then.

I leaned down, closed my eyes, and pressed my lips against hers. Electricity shot through my whole body, instantly. Emily's hands gravitated to my hips and she balled her fists around the ends of my t-shirt, pulling me into her further. Her tongue shot through two sets of lips and she began to massage it against my own. My knees had gone weak and had it not been for Emily holding me up, I would have collapsed in a heap on the floor. After several minutes we reluctantly broke apart for air.

Emily released a breathy "Goodnight" and left me standing there. I quickly leaned against the door to keep my balance. When I felt I could properly stand, I entered my room and walked over to the bed. I plopped down, hard, and stared at the ceiling. I relived that kiss for several hours before drifting off to sleep. Once asleep I continued to relive it. I had a feeling I would relive that kiss for the rest of my life.


	9. Not Good Enough

**AN: Hey guys! Sorry about the delay. This one was hard for me to write and I had to prepare myself for it. I can only apologize for this chapter. :/ I promise next time will be happier. See you then. Please don't hate me.**

Emily Fitch – 16 years old

_Ok, Emily, breathe. You're supposed to breathe, remember? It's sort of vital. _I took a deep breath and steadied myself as I stepped slowly down the hall towards my room. Wow. Just wow! I think this might actually be the best night of my life. I hear the shuffling of feet not far away and look up to find James lurking in the doorway of the bathroom. He looks like he just won the lottery. Great, he saw! How the fuck am I supposed to get him to keep his mouth shut?

"What the hell are you doing up?" I ask him, already dreading the possibility of what might happen if he lets this slip in front of Mum.

"I needed a wee," he shrugged, "how long have you been into fanny?" He had a wicked grin on his face.

"I…" Oh fuck! What the hell am I supposed to do? James couldn't keep a secret to save his life. This night just went from best to worst in 0.2 seconds! "James… you've got to keep schtum about this, alright? Mum can't know! Ever!"

His face changed immediately from amused to offended. "Me? Tell Mum? She'd probably have you locked up. And then I'd never get to see a show like that again! Not a chance! Besides, I'm no snitch."

I scrunched my nose up at him. "Trust me, you'll never get a show like that again. You wouldn't have even seen that if I had known you were there." I rolled my eyes, amused as he frowned at me. "Hopeless perv." I said and ruffled his hair. I knelt down so that I was eye level with him. "I mean it though, James. You can't tell Mum, ok?"

He looked thoughtful for a moment and nodded energetically. "Yeah, alright." He said. I gave him a hug, kissed his forehead, and sent him back to bed. I breathed deeply again as I closed my bedroom door. I know James said he wouldn't tell, and I know he would never do that to me on purpose, he's the best little brother ever. But, still the fear is creeping in the back of my mind that he'll let it slip. James doesn't have a censor. Whatever he's thinking always just flies out of his mouth without a second thought. I know this is going to end badly.

I try to clear my mind as I lie down and try to sleep. By the time I finally doze two hours later, a dull pain has set into my head from all the worry. I try to steel myself against it, be ready for what I know is coming. But all I can feel is fear. The same fear I felt about kissing Naomi in the first place. I'm not allowed this. My mother doesn't approve of this. She won't let me have it. She's going to take it from me, like I always knew she would.

I allow myself an escape from building dread as I sleep, hoping that I can keep it at bay for my last day with Naomi at Mama Fitch's. But I'm not so lucky.

I'm pulled from sleep the next morning by Naomi's voice in the hallway. She sounds distressed and concerned.

"But I don't understand!" she's saying to someone, I can hear that her breath is uneven; the stress of whatever is happening has brought her to tears. I jump from the bed, quickly to see what's wrong. I stop, though, and listen from behind the door when I hear Mama Fitch's voice reply.

"I know sweetheart," she says, "I don't understand either, but you've got to go. Emily will be fine. You can't be here when she arrives. You've got to go." When who arrives? Naomi lets out another distressed cry and in it I find my answer. Once again, my world crumbles around me.

"But it's only Emily's mother! I don't understand! Why won't you tell me; what's going on?" The concern in her voice is evident. She doesn't want to go. She knows this has something to do with me and she doesn't want to leave me alone. I want to barge through the door and hug her. I want to thank her for caring about me. I want to tell her that I'll be fine. I want to kiss away her worry and bury my own fear along with it, but I can't. I can't move. I can't breathe. This is it. She knows and she's coming. It's all over. I just found her and now she's going to be taken from me.

There is silence in the hall for a long moment before Naomi releases a defeated sigh. "Can I at least tell her I'm going? I can't let her think I've left her."

Mama Fitch's voice is tired when she replies, "I'm sorry dear, but it's best if you go now. Emily will understand. I'll tell her everything. But you've got to go now. You don't want to be caught in the middle of this."

"I don't care!" Naomi replies, stubbornly.

"I know you don't," Mama Fitch says, her voice softer than before, "But Emily does. This is going to be hard enough for her without you being involved. I know you don't understand right now. I'm sure Emily will tell you later, but right now you've got to go."

Mama Fitch was right. I could handle abuse from my mother, but I don't know what I would do if she attacked Naomi. That would just be too much for me.

That seemed to do the trick for Naomi as well, and I listened as she walked down the stairs. I felt an emptiness flood my body as I heard the front door close. I opened the door to find Mama Fitch standing in the hall with her thumb and forefinger clamping the bridge of her nose. She looked up at me. Her shoulders were slumped and her eyes were drowsy.

I imagined that my appearance mirrored hers. We were both awaiting the storm of Jenna Fitch, and we were both powerless against it. Sure, Mum would be civil in front of Mama Fitch, but if I knew my mother, she would take me home and attack me there. She would probably even leave the rest of the family at Mama Fitch's so no one could come to my aid.

"You heard all that then?" Mama Fitch asked me. I weakly nodded in reply. She walked over, handed me a clean towel, and kissed my forehead. "Get yourself cleaned up then. She'll be arriving soon." I nodded again and stepped past her. I walked past the main bathroom and into the bedroom that Naomi had been using to use the shower there instead. I don't know why, really. But somehow just knowing that she had been there made me feel safer, somehow.

I finished with my shower, dressed, and went downstairs to meet my fate. I wanted to run, but what would be the point? I always knew this would happen one day. If it wasn't today it would be later. I might as well take it now. I walked into the kitchen to find my mother sitting at the kitchen table with her back to me. She turned when she heard me and if looks could kill, I wouldn't just have died. I would be dust.

Her lips moved slightly as she went to speak but she was cut off by Mama Fitch.

"There is no fighting in this house, Jenna!" She hissed at my mother.

I had heard that tone before, just once. We had our birthday party at Mama Fitch's one year, a pool party, and Mum had walked outside just to find Katie snogging some guy with tattoos, a Mohawk, and a nose ring. Mum had rushed over to them, pulled him away from her and pushed him in the pool. She then proceeded to kick everyone out before turning on Katie. She didn't say a word, just reached her hand out to slap her. Mama Fitch had caught her on the backswing though, and that was the first time I heard it. "I dare you." She had said. And that's exactly what she meant now. 'I dare you to hurt my grandchild.'

Mum recoiled when she heard it, she knew what it meant. But she wasn't giving up so easily. Just like I knew she wouldn't.

"Of course not," she said, her voice dripping with defiance. She turned to face me again, "In the car, please, Emily. You and I are going for a ride." Tears began welling up in my eyes and I forced them back down.

"Mum, please, she hasn't d-, " Katie began from the doorway, but Mum cut her off. She had just arrived. I wondered, briefly where she had come from, and where Dad and James were.

"I suggest you keep schtum, young lady!" Mum scolded her, "If you hadn't kept secrets about what happened on your birthday last year, this wouldn't even be happening. I can't believe you're even defending her after what she did to that nice boy you were with."

Katie and I both stood, staring disbelievingly, her at my mother, me at Katie. I couldn't look at my mother, I couldn't see her look at me the way I knew she would.

"Danny was a twat, Mum! And he deserved what he got!" Katie spat at Mum, "How could you even say that after what he did to Ems? And how can you speak to her that way? She's done nothing wrong!" I looked down at the ground and held back more tears. I loved Katie, and Mama Fitch, and Naomi all for wanting to help me, but it didn't matter. Nothing they could say would change her mind.

"That's quite enough!" Mum spat with finality, "This is none of your business! Now Emily, get in the car!"

Katie looked helplessly at me as I passed her on my way out the door. I heard one last "Mum, please!" from her as Mum followed, but there was no reply. Mum walked right past her and slammed the front door behind her as we exited. We rode silently in the car for a long time before I noticed that I didn't recognize where we were.

"Where are we going?" I asked, not able to keep the concern from my voice.

"You'll find out when we get there." She said, her voice too calm for my liking, "Now, is there something you would like to tell me?"

"No," I scoffed, "You already know, anyway, so why would I tell you? You think I spent the last three years looking forward to this?"

"Three years?" Mum practically shouted at me. It had exactly the effect I thought it would. I knew it would only make things worse, but what good would it do to hid it now? Mum was taking deep breathes from the seat next to me. Good, I thought, maybe she'll pass out and I can go find Naomi and we'll run off somewhere. I rolled my eyes at myself. Yeah right, like I could be so lucky.

"Where are we going?" I repeated, hoping Mum's new vulnerability would earn me an answer. She let out a deep sigh.

"We're going to see a lovely minister just outside London who says he can help you. He has a program we can enrol you in that will help you realize what can happen to you if you continue with this… abomination and he can help you cha-."

"You're taking me to an ex-gay camp?" I shouted back at her. No, no, that's it. This has gone too far. I started fiddling with the door handle. I'm not staying in this car one more second. I don't care if I get run over. I don't care if it kills me. I'd rather die than this. Mum stops the car when she notices what I'm doing and I get out and storm away in the other direction. I can't stop the sob that rips through my throat and the tears that stream from my eyes.

Why can't I have just been fucking normal? Why did this have to happen to me? Three years of hiding. Three years of hoping Rachel wouldn't tell anyone. Three years of dreading this exact moment, knowing it would be the worst thing to ever happen to me. But nothing, nothing can prepare you for what it feels like to have your own mother look at you in disgust. Nothing can prepare you for what it feels like to know that you'll never be her little girl again. That she hates what you are. That she wants to fix you; that you're not good enough.

I'm so tired. I just want it all to stop. I fall to the ground in defeat. I don't care what happens. Take me to the camp. Try to fix me. Kill me if you want, I don't care. I don't want to fight anymore.

I hear footsteps approaching and I tense my body involuntarily. I guess I'd better get used to that. It's the only thing I'll ever be able to do to protect myself from now on.

"Emily, this is ridiculous, get back in the car." Mum scolded me. I just sat there, sobbing, defeated. I didn't get up. I just sat there. That's what I'll always do, I thought. Sit here. I won't fight anymore. I won't try. I'll just sit here and wait for something to happen.

"Alright! Alright! You win." Mum said, "We'll go home. Just get in the car."

I looked up at her disbelievingly. Why was she giving in so easily? I looked into her eyes for proof that she was telling the truth. What I saw there sent a fresh stream of pain through my chest. She didn't love me anymore. She was disgusted by me. But I also could see that she wasn't lying.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because you're my daughter, Emily." She said, "And I can't send you away. It was silly of me to believe that I could. But I'm sorry, Emily, I can't accept this. I just can't. It's wrong. You know that. It's just wrong."

I couldn't hold it in anymore.

"What's so wrong about it, Mum?" I shouted at her, "You think I wanted this? You think I asked for it? You think I wouldn't give anything to be normal; to be like Kate. Well I'm not normal and there's nothing I can do about it. I've tried! It won't go away! I'm sorry! I'm fucking sorry, ok?"

"I'm sorry too." Mum said coldly and my heart broke a little more.

"But you're my Mum! You're supposed to love me no matter what! I'm not supposed to be afraid to tell you things! I'm not supposed to hate myself because of you!" I looked up at her this time, letting all of my anger flood into my eyes as I did. Her own eyes widened. She looked away from me.

"I do love you, Emily," she said quietly, "but I will never accept this."

The word 'never' turned my blood to ice. I stared disbelievingly at the ground. Does she even hear herself? How can you love someone and not accept them? Does she think I can just change it? I just told her I couldn't! I don't understand.

"I'll be waiting in the car." She said, and turned and walked away.

A few moments later I got into the back seat of the car. I didn't want to, but it was cold and I knew I had to go back eventually. I didn't stop crying. I couldn't make it stop hurting. I couldn't make myself understand.

We didn't speak on the way home. When we got back to Mama Fitch's I ran from the car before Mum could say anything to me. I tore up the stairs, into my room and locked the door behind me.

A few moments later there was a knock on my door. "Mum says it's time to go." Katie said through the door.

"I'm not coming." I said, just loud enough for her to hear. It was quiet for several minutes before she spoke again.

"I love you, Ems," is all she said before I heard her walk away and down the stairs.

A few moments later I heard her and Mum shouting at one another. I couldn't make out what they were saying. Eventually the noise stopped and the house was quiet again. I lied down and let the quiet wash over me. I fell asleep having cried all the tears my body would allow, my only relief was in knowing that this day was finally over.


	10. Try To Fix You

**AN: Hello! First, I'd like to do a quick shout out. So, Hello to all of my followers, old and new. Thanks for liking my story. Also, I'd like to make a special shout out to marsupial1974 for being so awesome and giving me regular reviews. I love hearing your feedback and thank you so much for being so dedicated to the story. As well as my new reviewer, FancyMeetingLouHere, welcome to the house of fun! **

**Ok, now. This chapter is still a bit gloomy but as long as Emily is smiling again we're all happy, right? Happy times returning here and I promise they will stick around... for a while. Anyways, sorry again for ripping your heart out in the last chapter but... here's a band-aid. Enjoy. See you next time! **

Naomi Campbell – 16 years old

"Jesus Christ, Naomi!" Effy scolded me, "Your fucking moping is doing my head in. Just go see her!"

Everyone in the house has been walking around the house as if it's a mine field the past few days, just waiting for me to pop up and explode on them. I can't say I blame them. To say I've been on edge is an understatement. I'm just so worried about Emily. It's been three days and I haven't heard from her. What if Jenna sent her away? What if she thinks I left her and now she won't speak to me? What if she… No, Emily wouldn't hurt herself. She wouldn't do that. I just wish I knew something.

I had woken up that morning at Mama Fitch's house and gone downstairs to see if Emily was awake. I had only just walked in the kitchen when I heard James say "And I was going to see if Emily was still awake but then I saw her kissing Naomi so…" He had stopped mid-sentence and all I could hear was muffled screaming through the phone he was talking on. After that all hell broke loose. Mama Fitch had taken the phone from James and was screaming into it and James had collapsed on the floor, crying. He kept repeating "I didn't mean to," to himself as he wrung his hands in his lap.

I stood, slack-jawed in the doorway, staring at them, until Mama Fitch hung up the phone and approached me. "You've got to go before Jenna gets here," Was all she said to me before shoving me back up the stairs. I glanced at James as I left and he was staring at me. He whispered a barely audible "I'm sorry," to me before I was ripped from his sight.

So was this why Emily always looked so broken when she talked about her mother? Is this why she was afraid to kiss me? My heart broke for her as I realized what Emily hadn't told me. How could people be so cruel? How could a mother make her daughter feel that way? I wanted to be there for Emily. I didn't want her to go through this on her own. But I knew Mama Fitch was right when she told me Emily wouldn't want me there. I knew it would hurt her even more if her mum was cruel to me too. So I left. And now I just wish she would call me.

"How can I do that, Eff?" I almost whined, "Her mother would call the police if she saw me within a hundred feet of her house! And what if Emily doesn't want me there?"

"You're an idiot, Naomi!" Effy said and I stared at her in disbelief.

"What?" Who the fuck does she think she is?

Effy sighed deeply and plopped herself down next to me on the sofa.

"I'm sorry," she said, and I softened a bit, "but not for calling you an idiot. You're still an idiot." I glared at her. She smiled softly, "I'm sorry for the way I treated you the past couple of months."

I stared at her, brow furrowed. Ok, Effy had once again succeeded in saying the last thing I expected.

"She used to watch you, you know? Remember when Gina let you stay that summer when we were eleven?" I was still confused, but I nodded, anyway. "We went to the water park one afternoon and the Fitch's were there as well. She couldn't keep her eyes off you. It was like you were magnetic to her. And when I saw you staring at her picture in my yearbook, I knew as soon as you met I would lose you. That you wouldn't be mine anymore. I knew she wouldn't remember you; you look nothing like you did back then. The only thing that never changed is your eyes. And she never got close enough to see them. But I knew that wouldn't matter, because you're still you, aren't you?"

I was stunned. I had been having so much fun that day that I didn't even notice that I was being watched. But now that Effy had mentioned it, I do remember seeing the twins that day. It never occurred to me when I saw them in the yearbook that they were the same twins. But wait, what had Effy said? That she would lose me? Hold on.

"Effy, lose me? What are you talking about?" I asked.

She just shook her head. "I've been a twat." She said, "I was selfish. But I'm ready to share you now, ok? And I can't take any more of this moody shit, so go to Emily's gran's. I'm sure she'll at least tell you what happened. And who knows? Maybe Emily will still be there."

It did make sense. Emily hadn't been to school and if she hadn't been sent away she was probably still at Mama Fitch's, just wanting to be away from her mother. I nodded to myself before running to my room to grab my jumper. On the way out the door, I stopped just outside the living room.

"I love you, Eff." I told my best friend. She smiled at me.

"I know." She said and I smiled widely, knowing it meant we were ok. Then, I was out the door and at Mama Fitch's house before I had time to notice where I was going.

I took a deep breath and pressed the doorbell, praying to every god I could think of that Emily was inside, and that she was ok. Seconds later I was greeted by Mama Fitch.

"Naomi, dear! Thank goodness. You need to get her out of that room! She's only come out to use the loo and she's barely eaten the food I've given her. She won't speak to anyone, not even Katie. There's nothing more I can do for her. I'm concerned, Naomi. She needs you."

I don't think I've ever moved so fast in my life. Emily needs me, that's all I needed to hear. I ran up the stairs and didn't stop until I reached the top. I still didn't know which room was Emily's so I stood silently for a moment and listened. I heard ragged breathing from behind one of the doors and ran to it. I tapped on the door.

"I'm told you I'm not coming out." Emily said weakly. Her voice sounded wrong, more broken than I had ever heard it. She didn't even sound like Emily. I breathed deeply to stop the tears that welled up in my eyes.

"Well then maybe you could let me in." I said. The ragged breathing stopped. A few seconds later there was a shuffling inside and she opened the door a crack.

"Naomi?" she said as she opened the door.

"Oh my god, Emily!" She was wearing the same clothes she had worn the night I was here. They were stretched out and the material around the collar of her shirt was darkened from the amount of crying she had done that had fallen onto it. Her hair was matted and dirty and she had dark circles under her eyes that extended down to her cheekbones. Her eyes are red and looked empty. It was like she was looking right through me, like I wasn't even there.

Tears welled up in my eyes the moment I saw her. I pushed through the cracked door and into the room, closing the door behind me. Emily looked down at herself and her body tensed. She hid her face with her hair as she sat on the bed and pulled her knees into her chest, hiding as much of herself as she could from my view. I walked slowly towards her, all the while trying to figure out what I could possibly do to make her ok. How was I supposed to fix whatever damage Jenna had done?

"Em?" I said, cautiously. I feel like a complete tit! What the hell am I doing? She looks like she's given up, altogether. How can I help her? What did that cunt do to her? "Em, what happened?"

Emily's breath grew more ragged at the question and she burrowed herself even more into herself. It made me feel even more helpless. I still don't know what Jenna did to her, but whatever it was is what made Emily this way. If I thought it would help, I would head over to the Fitch's house right now and kill the fucking cow! But I know it wouldn't. So I sit, hoping that just being here will be of some help to Emily, hoping that if I sit here long enough, she'll talk to me.

After a long time, she finally does.

"I can't do this, Naomi." She says, her voice is lifeless and broken.

"Can't do what?" I ask, trying to make my voice comforting. She inhales a deep, shaky breath and releases it.

"I can't fight her. I can't pretend it's not killing me. I can't keep being me when I know she hates me." She closes her eyes and breathes deeply again, several times, before continuing. I know she wants to cry, but I don't think there are any tears left in her. "She was going to send me away… to fix me. She thinks I'm wrong, broken. She says I know that it's wrong, that she taught me that it's wrong, that she can't accept it." Emily's voice grew more strained with every word. The more her voice strained, the more my heart broke.

I closed the space between us and held her as close as I possibly could. A loud sob broke through her and I squeezed tighter. For the second time, today, I prayed to gods that I, otherwise, never thought twice about. I prayed that she would be ok; I prayed that the tears she had found meant that she was coming back to me.

I held Emily for a long time, just letting her cry. I stroked her hair now and then, just to show her that I was really here. When her breathing steadied out a bit, I held her shoulders and gently moved her away from me, just enough so that I could see her face. She was reluctant, but allowed me to do so.

"Em, look at me." I said, softly, and waited for her eyes to meet mine before I continued, "Em, you are the most amazing person I have ever met. There are so many things about you that are wonderful. You see the world in the most beautiful way. The world would be so much better if there were more people like you. You are incredible, and there is absolutely nothing. You hear me? Nothing is wrong with you. You can't let her make you feel this way, ok? You are beautiful! She's the one who's wrong, not you. You have so much love inside of you, Emily. How could it possibly be wrong to share that love with another person? She's wrong, ok?"

She was staring at me, her face stony. I could see every emotion in her eyes. She wanted, desperately, to believe what I was saying, but she couldn't. Her mother had been teaching her that she had come out wrong since before Emily even knew who she was. How was I supposed to fix what Jenna spent sixteen years slowly chipping away at?

"Four days ago, when I was on my way home after Mama Fitch had asked me to leave, I was thinking about what just happened and I realized why you never told me about your mother. Then, for the past three days, I've been thinking about God. That's not something I usually do, but I was trying to figure out why Jenna would treat you that way. I remembered you telling me a while ago how she had taught you that it was a sin; that the gays would burn in hell. So I've been thinking about it; and I just can't seem to wrap my head around the whole thing. I know that I don't have any control over my feelings for you. They're just there and there's nothing I can do about them. So if God is up there, and he made us, and he doesn't think that two people should love each other, then why did he make them love each other? No one decides to fall in love, it just happens. How could God ever have a problem with that?"

Emily looked thoughtful. She had been listening carefully as I spoke and she had stopped crying. She smiled weakly and my heart soared. I would give my life right now if it was the only thing that would keep her smiling.

"I never thought I'd see the day when Naomi Campbell pondered the concept of God," she joked, "but you're right." She said, more seriously. Her glimmer of a smile fell again, "The only problem is, Mum doesn't believe that. She still thinks I'm wrong."

Emily hung her head again. No! No! I'm not letting her bury herself again. Jenna is not going to do this to her! I placed my hand below her chin and lifted her eyes to meet mine.

"She's wrong, ok? And one day she'll figure that out. But until then, you don't need her, ok? You don't need anyone who makes you feel this way. She'll come round one day. I can only imagine how horrible this is for you, but you _can_ do this. And you've got me to help you. And you've got the rest of your family as well. And I don't know about them, but I'll smack down anyone else who ever tries to steal the light from your eyes again."

Emily was looking at me the way she had before, now, and I felt like I could fly. She's going to be ok. She's coming back to me. Her smile this time is stronger than before, and my heart soars even higher at the sight of it. She lunges forward and pulls me into a firm hug, she holds for a few moments and then pulls back and kisses my lips. This kiss isn't laced with desire like our first. This kiss is tender; this kiss is telling me something. She pulls back and looks into my eyes. I blink my eyes several times to bring her into focus. She's fully smiling now and I'm still praising every god in the world that she's here and she's ok.

"I love you, Naomi." Emily says to me and I wrap my arms around her again. I know exactly what she means. Neither of us know where this is going, yet. It's too early to know what will happen between us. But what I do know is that whether we are friends or something more, in just these few months, Emily has become everything to me. I don't care what we are in the long run, as long as I have her. I squeeze her tightly before pulling back to look at her.

"I love you too."


	11. Back to School

**AN: Hi guys! So, I'm sure we're all glad the crap with Jenna is over; and now Emily can start healing, as well as becoming more and more star struck by Naomi. :) So let's enjoy the happy time until Emily has to face Jenna again. :/ *sighs* Chapter 11, everybody! Enjoy! See you next time!**

Emily Fitch – 16 years old

"Em," Ok, so the voice matches my dream, but that pressure on my shoulder doesn't… "Em, wake up. We've got college. You've missed two days already, come on." What? College? Oh! Now I get it, not a dream. I shifted myself around in bed and was amazed when I didn't need to use every ounce of energy I had to do it. I was even more amazed when my eyes opened, effortlessly and I was met with Naomi's face hovering over me. She had an adoring smile on her face. The memories of the past three days drifted easily to the back of my mind at the sight of that smile. I would love to wake up this way every morning, I thought as I returned her smile.

"Morning." I said, cheerfully.

How does she make it all go away so easily? The past three days were practically forgotten as I remembered how she had stayed with me last night. How she had sat on the bed beside me, rubbing my back or stroking my hair. She sat with me for hours and let me cry listened to me talk about Mum and the things she had taught us about how it was wrong to be gay; and about when I was thirteen and I kissed Rachel at that party; and how ever since, I had known, for sure, that I was gay; and how I've spent the last three years just hoping she would never find out; and how my feelings for her had scared the shit out of me because I knew I couldn't fight them and that eventually I wouldn't be able to hide them, I hadn't realized, though, how little time I would have before they were out in the open.

The whole time, as Naomi listened to me talk, she never stopped touching me; she never let me forget she was there with me. When I would pause in my story, Naomi would take that time to say wonderful things to me. She would tell me that I was beautiful, and she would always be here for me, and she would never let anyone hurt me this way again. Naomi had been nothing short of wonderful, but just when I thought she had been perfect, she outdid herself.

When my eyes grew weary and I couldn't talk anymore, Naomi kicked off her shoes and lied down next to me. She put her arm around my waist and pulled me into her, cuddling us up as close as we could get. She kissed my hair and then leaned in to speak in my ear. I'll never forget what she said. "Emily Fitch, you are nothing short of incredible. For years, you've been told that what you are is wrong. You've been keeping a secret about yourself, which is something no one should ever have to do. Yet somehow, all this time, you've managed to keep your eyes bright. You've managed to keep going. For three years, you kept yourself going; and even now, you're still trying, even though it's harder than ever. You are one of the strongest people I have ever met. You are what's good in the world. And I will fight anyone who tries to change you. Just as importantly, I'll fight anyone who tries to take you away from me. Because I know you've only been in my life a few short months, but now that you are, life without you just wouldn't be worth it."

Naomi slept with me all night, still never moving her arm from me. And now, this morning, I don't think I've ever felt so good in all my life. I slept better than ever. And more importantly, she's still here, smiling at me.

"Good morning, beautiful," she says to me, "You'd better hurry. Mama Fitch says she has breakfast on the table and if you don't come get it in the next ten minutes she's feeding it to the stray cat that lives under the front porch."

I roll my eyes and chuckle. "Alright, Alright, I'm up!" I say as I scoop myself out of the bed. I don't want to go to college today. I know I'll run into Katie and she'll want me to come home. I'm not ready to go home yet. "Nai?" I turn around to face her.

"Hmm?" she asks, looking up from straightening the duvet from where I had just gotten up.

"Do we have to go to college today? I'm not ready to face Katie yet. I know she'll ask me to come home." I say with a pleading look in my eyes. It would be so lovely to spend the day with Naomi, just us.

Her eyes hold sympathy when she nods at me. She walks over and hugs me tightly. "Sorry, Ems," she says into my hair, "we've got to go. We have a history exam and Harriet announced yesterday that 'any work missed during an absence will officially be counted as incomplete.'" She pulled back and air quoted the last part, "She says it's because no one gives a fuck and never shows up on exam days because they know they can just take them later. So sorry, Ems, but I can't let your Mum negatively affect your education as well."

I frowned. "Still, we always do a review the day before and I've missed it, I'll probably fail, anyway."

She smiled at me, "Oh Ems, you don't think I'd let that happen, do you? My copy of the review is on the table waiting for you. I had Mum drop by my things this morning on her way to Mr Nelson's cattle farm. All her friends are meeting her over there and they're going to spend the day yelling at anyone who drives by about animal cruelty."

I chuckled. "You're amazing. And I really can't wait to meet your Mum."

"That reminds me, actually," her voice jumped two octaves and she shuffled her feet excitedly, "You're going to meet her! Tomorrow is my birthday and after college we're going to my house to celebrate. Effy told me I have to bring you even though all of Mum's hippy friends will be there."

"I'm sure they're lovely," I said, and kissed her nose, "now if you don't mind, I need to get ready and go have my breakfast before it goes to Mr Mittens."

"I'll be downstairs." She said with a smile, and then kissed my forehead and left the room.

Naomi and Mama Fitch chatted cheerfully over a cup of tea as I ate my breakfast and crammed for my History exam. When I finished we said our farewells to Mama Fitch and walked, hand in hand, towards Roundview. When we were a block away, Naomi stopped abruptly.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

She looked sheepish, "Well, it's just…" she held up our joined hands, "Katie, you know? I know she doesn't care but her friends are pricks and what if something gets back to your Mum, I don't want you to have to deal with any more crap."

I nodded, fully understanding what she meant. I couldn't help but notice, though, that she looked disappointed. I closed the space between us and wrapped my arms around her neck, pulling her down and kissing her firmly on the lips. Just as with the last two, I felt a surge of electricity fill my body the second our lips touched. When I pulled away, I took a deep breath to steady myself before speaking.

"I can't let you go, Naomi. It would make everything so much easier if I just pretended this never happened, but I wouldn't be happy. I couldn't be. So I know I'm gonna have to face up to Mum eventually, but I'm not ready yet. I just need some time to deal with everything before I face her again." I said, hoping she would understand what I meant. I want to be with Naomi, but I'm just not ready for everyone to know. I can't handle any more abuse from Mum right now; I need to figure out how to not let her hurt me.

She flashed me a sweet smile and kissed the top of my head. "I know, Em, it's ok," she said, "As long as you're in my life, I don't need anything else."

I don't know what I did to deserve her. She's just so bloody perfect!

I released a deep sigh as I pulled out of the embrace, straightening my bag on my shoulder. "Well I guess I'd better find my sister, I haven't spoken to her in days and she's probably shitting herself."

"I know the feeling." Naomi said with a playful smirk.

I know she didn't mean for it to, but I felt a twinge of guilt. "Sorry." I said honestly, and leaned in to kiss her cheek. "I'll miss you. See you in Politics." I meant it too, Politics was only our second class of the day, but any time away from Naomi was beginning to feel like forever.

I knew she was watching me as I walked away and for the first time in my life it didn't bother me that I was being perved at. In fact, I swayed my hips that little bit extra, I wanted her to look. I wanted to look good for her.

I found Katie standing by the lockers and made my way over. As I got closer I was shocked to find who she was standing with.

"I thought you two hated each other?" I said, staring at them as if they had both suddenly sprouted extra arms and were using them to braid each other's hair.

"Life's too short." Effy said simply.

Well that was cliché, I thought.

"Yeah," Katie agreed, "plus we've found some common ground. You and Campbell have both been ditching us to make kissy face."

There was a hint of accusation in her voice and it stung a little. Effy must have noticed it too because she closed her locker and walked away, muttering a short "See you," as she went.

My eyes followed her a few steps before turning back to Katie who was now standing cross-armed with her lips pursed.

"Nice to finally see you, Bitch." She said, telling me she was angry and that she missed me all in the same sentence. Katie is good at that, saying everything she needs to with hardly any words at all.

"I'm sorry I haven't spoken to you, Katie. I just didn't know what to say. I knew you would want me to come back home and work things out with Mum and I just can't yet, ok?" I might as well tell her before she has a chance to ask, right?

She stared at me for a moment before speaking again.

"Actually, Ems, I wasn't." she said, "I do miss you but if it was me, I wouldn't want to come home either. I totally get it. But you do have to talk to her eventually, yeah? I know she's a bloody bitch but she's still our Mum."

"I know," I said, "I just don't know how. I can't make her be ok with it, but I can't be ok with her hating it. It hurts, you know?"

My voice starts shaking and I hold back tears that threated to rise. I huff in frustration, biting my lip and fighting hard not to cry. I look at Katie who is staring back at me with concern, she leans forward to hug me but I back away. I know if she does I'll lose my resolve; and I'm tired of crying. I can't let her hurt me anymore; it's the only way I'll ever be able to face her.

Katie nods and grabs my hand instead. "I know." She says. And with the help of Katie's grip on my hand, I manage to simmer myself. She gives my hand one final squeeze and lets go.

"I miss you, Ems" she says, softly. I look into her eyes to find that they look weary. Most of the things people say about twins are completely ridiculous. We can't communicate telepathically; we don't have the same dreams; and if Katie stepped on a nail, I wouldn't feel it. But it's always been this way, emotionally. If one of us is hurting, the other feels it too. It's always felt good, having that kind of connection with someone. But for the first time in my life, I wish we didn't. I wish Katie didn't have to feel this with me.

"I miss you too, Katie." I said, and it was the truth. This is the first time I've spoken to her since that night and I haven't gotten a chance to talk to her about it all. Naomi has made me feel so much better, but I'll always need Katie. Not the way I used to, but I need her to be my sister. I need her to be Katie. Life would kind of suck without her.

"So can hang out tomorrow, please?" she asked, "I'll come over to Mama Fitch's and we can go swimming."

I frowned. I did want to spend time with Katie, but there was no chance of me missing out on Naomi's birthday tomorrow. I shook my head.

"I do miss you, Kates, but it can't be tomorrow," I said, "We'll do it the day after, ok? Tomorrow is Nai's birthday."

She smirked at me and I knew she was considering taking the piss out of my nickname for Naomi. But her smirk grew into a smile and she leaned in to kiss my cheek.

"Fine, lezzer," she said, playfully, "but I'm holding you to that, yeah? Don't think I won't pry you from her lips if I have to."

I rolled my eyes, but smiled and leaned in to return her affection.

"You know I'd have to kill you." I said, joining in the banter.

The bell rang and we both turned to walk away, leaving our conversation hanging in the air.

"See you later, sis. Love you." Katie yelled over her shoulder as she hurried off in the opposite direction as me.

"Love you too!" I yelled back as I turned the corner.

I smiled to myself as I entered the classroom and took my seat, happy, once again, that the infection known as homophobia hadn't come between me and my sister. I took a glance at the clock as I dug in my bag for my notebook and a pen. Only 52 more minutes until I see Naomi again, I mentally noted. I spent the rest of the class thinking about her smile and doodling her name in my notebook. When the bell rang I ran from the room like a bat out of hell. I didn't even care that I hadn't heard a word of the lecture.


	12. Best Present Ever

**AN: Hey guys! Ok, so it's Naomi's birthday... lets see if she gets any good presents *wink* I hope you guys enjoy seeing Emily and Naomi get... closer. *winks again* Lol, no seriously, though. The girls relationship is growing and in this chapter, they start to get a bit more intimate. No full on sex though, yet. Sorry. But it will happen when they're ready. Don't worry. lol. Alright, well, hope you enjoy. See you next time.**

Naomi Campbell – 17 years old

The final bell rings and I get up from my seat with a smile on my face. Thanks to Effy being sure to tell all of 'the gang' that today was my birthday, I had to suffer through a day full of people screaming my name down the hallway and slapping my arse 'for good luck' when I let them get too close. Effy and Emily, both, had found it all rather hilarious, of course. I was just glad the day was over. I rounded the corner on my way to the exit and was met with Cook, Freddie, and JJ walking in the opposite direction. A wide smile spread across Cook's face.

"Naomikins!" he bellowed, walking towards me with his arms spread wide, "so are we celebrating or what?" Cook was a tit, but as long as he sported his childish grin it was impossible to ever really be annoyed with him.

"Sorry, Cook," I said, smiling at him, "but it's sort of a family thing, just Mum, Anthea, Effy, and Mum's hippy crowd, and Emily of course."

Cook put his hand over his heart, still smiling brightly. "Oi! That hurts, Blondie! I thought we was all family!"

Cook and the rest of the gang were great. They were a good group of mates, but as for right now, I just couldn't be bothered. I didn't have time to worry about making friends; I had more important things on my mind. Like, for instance, the red head I just spotted through the window, sitting on the college green, waiting for me.

"Sorry, Cook, got to go." I said as I started to walk towards Emily. I didn't even bother looking back at Cook and the others. Emily always did that to me, as soon as I saw her, it was like no one else existed. Everything was Emily. Cook bellowed something behind me as I walked away, but I didn't hear him, only muffled sounds that I vaguely recognized as his voice.

I reached Emily and plopped down next to her on the grass. I had a small, sweet smile on my face, a smile I had reserved just for Emily.

"Hey, gorgeous." She said as she turned to face me. I felt my face heat up slightly.

"Hey, yourself," I replied, "You ready to meet my weirdo's?" Emily knew I was referring to my Mum's hippy friends. They had been around ever since we moved here and most of them were really cool; I spent a lot of time talking to them. So they had sort of become my weirdo's too, not just Mum's.

Emily giggled and my eyes fluttered shut at the sound. God, I love that sound. "Ready as I can be, I suppose." She said cheerfully, shrugging.

"Alright then," I said as I got to my feet, I held out a hand to help Emily, "up you get." She took my hand and I pulled her up. Our bodies crashed lightly together as she reached her feet and I felt an increasingly familiar surge of electricity. I blushed, slightly, as we both straightened our clothes.

It only took us about fifteen minutes to walk from the college to my house. Walking with Emily was quickly becoming one of my favourite things. She grabbed my hand and laced our fingers as soon as we were out of sight of the college. I loved the way her hand felt in mine. I wished I could hold it all the time, not only when no one was looking.

We reached my house and I stopped us in front of the driveway and turned to face Emily. She looked nervous. It was so cute! I opened my mouth to ask if she was ok, but she blurted out an answer before the question even came.

"What if your Mum doesn't like me? I mean, she knows you like me, right? Like… like like me. What if she thinks…"

"Em!" I stopped her before she could go any further. "Firstly, My Mum isn't like Jenna. She's ok with whatever I do; she just wants me to be happy. And secondly, she's going to love you; how could she not?"

Emily looked at me disbelievingly and I felt a stab of pain in my chest, again, as I thought of what this will be like for her, meeting my Mum. She's not perfect, but she and Jenna have two completely different views of what being a mother is. Jenna tries to mould her kids; make them into glimmering trophies for her to show off. Mum, however, handed the reins over to me as soon as I could form coherent thoughts. "I'm not some narcissistic twat! You do what you want, darling! And I'll be here to smash anyone who gets in your way!" she had said to me. And as it turns out, I am a lot like my mum. And though she would never admit it, I think she loves it.

"Look Em," I said to her, "Mum's about as open minded as they come. You don't have anything to worry about." She still didn't look like she believed me; and I didn't want her to be nervous. I curled up my lips and placed my finger over them as I tried to think of a way to show her. Suddenly an idea struck me. I ran up to the garage door where I knew there were cans of spray paint lined up against it. I grabbed the colours I needed and ran back down and past Emily, into the street.

I started with a giant arrow, in pink, pointing directly at my house. I heard Emily gasp and looked up at her to see her staring at me, wide eyed. I just chuckled and went back to my 'art work'. Next, I painted an enormous rainbow with clouds at the ends. Emily was watching me curiously now. Finally, in big white letters, arching around the rainbow, I painted the words 'THIS HOME IS HOMO FRIENDLY'. Emily gasped much more audibly this time and when I looked up at her she looked horrified.

"Naomi! What if someone vandalises your house? Not to mention," she pointed at the street, "that is vandalism, you could get arrested!"

I chuckled at her again, she is so adorable. "Don't be silly, Em. They don't care if you paint on the street. It pisses down mostly, so it'll be gone in a week. And as for your concern about someone vandalising my house, don't be. That the police do care about, and sometimes it's worth a little trouble to make a statement. Now come on," I grabbed Emily's arm and led her up the driveway towards the house, "Let's see what Mum thinks of it." As I opened the front door Emily looked horrified again.

"Mum!" I shouted, "Come here for a minute. Emily and I want to show you something." Emily glared at me as if to say 'how dare you drag me into this', but I just smiled at her and placed a tiny kiss on her cheek. I think this is probably the most brilliant idea I've ever had.

Mum arrived in the doorway and I stood aside to let her out onto the porch, gesturing down to the street. Her face lit up with delight and she clapped her hands together, beaming proudly.

"Absolutely wonderful, girls!" She said as she turned to us and kissed us both on the head, "I was just saying we should fly a flag or something to show our support, but I like this much better!"

I smiled brightly at Emily who stared back at me with her jaw on the floor. I picked it back up for her when I said.

"Mum, this is Emily." Emily's face straightened right back up. She smiled politely and offered her hand to my mother to shake. Mum beamed down at her a moment before pushing right past Emily's arm and wrapping her in a hug. I just stood back and watched, smiling. By the look on Emily's face, I could tell this was something she wasn't used to.

Mum pulled away from Emily and held her shoulders. "So you're the one who's turned my Naomi into a love sick puppy, then?" Emily and I both blushed fiercely but Mum didn't seem to notice, she just continued on. "Well, it's so wonderful to finally meet you! I've heard your name so many times; I was beginning to wonder when this magnificent being I'd heard so much about would show itself!"

Please, just kill me now. "Mum!" I scolded, through my teeth, but she just smiled down at me, amusedly.

"Oh, don't be silly, Naomi! It's nothing to be ashamed of." She said and then turned around and entered the house. "Come on then," she said as she went, "we've got a celebration to tend to!"

We followed her inside and into the dining room where we found Anthea, Effy, and about twenty-odd hippies sitting on the floor in a circle. The table, I assumed, had been moved into the back yard. Inside the circle sat a large selection of odd foods, most of which I had tried and were delicious, but some of which tasted like cardboard or the smell of old shoes. Along with the food was about twenty bottles of assorted types of alcohol: Red wines, white wines, vodka, spiced rum, etc. There was also small box that I knew to contain spliff and various smoking devices; a large hookah with three hoses that was already burning, the hoses being passed around, somehow managing to stay untangled; and a large tub of water with a stack of cups stood next to it and a ladle floating around in it.

I smiled widely as I looked over at Emily. She stared back at me, still with that disbelieving look on her face. I grabbed her hand and led her over to an empty space in the circle, plopping us down between Effy and a guy with dreadlocks, wearing board shorts and a faded black t-shirt with the sleeves cut off. I knew him, I had talked to him lots of times; he was a pretty cool guy. But I never took the time to learn their names; I just remembered them by appearance, which wasn't hard as most of them hardly ever changed their clothes. They were kind of a nomadic people; they never stuck around very long so I didn't really see the point in learning their names.

I liked having them around because you didn't have to try around them. They were all so accepting. You could say things that had the potential to make you sound like a complete idiot, or you could say nothing at all; they didn't care. They were content just to have company.

For several hours we all just sat and enjoyed our spread. Emily and I spent the entire time inching closer to one another and about two spliffs, a bottle of Merlot, and a tray of organic wheat crackers later, Emily was quite literally in my lap. I don't really know when or how she got there, but I'm not complaining. At least, I wasn't complaining, until she started moving around.

Emily was really good at being subtle. Every few minutes she would find an excuse to rub up against me, moving herself, each time, further between my legs until her arse was pressed up against me. Once there, she kept shifting her weight, looking like she was just getting comfortable. I thought she might be doing it by accident, not realizing what she was doing to me, but then she slid her hand behind her back and began tracing patterns over my centre. My jeans were just tight enough that I could feel every touch. Soon, my stomach was clenched and every inch of my body was on fire. Jesus! Why is she doing this to me? I fought hard to keep my breathing slow and steady, but it was becoming increasingly difficult.

Before I knew what I was doing, my hand had wrapped around Emily's waist and I was pulling her into me, trying to satisfy the craving in my abdomen that was becoming painful. Emily's breath caught when I pulled her in and I looked around nervously, hoping no one had noticed. I was glad Effy had gone outside for some air, she notices everything.

"Em," I whispered breathily into her ear, "Em, you've gotta stop. This is starting to get painful."

Emily turned her head to look me in the eyes. Her pupils were dilated to the point that there was only a small sliver of brown left to be seen. She stared at me for a moment with a wicked grin before leaning in towards my ear. I thought she was going to whisper something back, but instead she continued slightly further and placed her lips around my neck. She ran her tongue lightly along it and I felt my body shiver. I closed my eyes and silently prayed again, that no one noticed. After a few seconds Emily removed her lips from my neck and breathed in my ear.

"Can we have some alone time?" she asked. I nodded lightly as a reply, still trying to keep my growing desire under control. Emily grabbed my hand and dragged me up. She led us out of the dining room and stopped at the foot of the stairs, allowing me to go ahead. I led us up the stairs and into my room. Emily closed and locked the door behind us and she was in control again. She led me over to the bed and we both sat down.

She stared into my eyes for a long moment before leaning in and kissing me softly. After a few seconds the kiss grew in intensity and Emily's tongue grazed my bottom lip, requesting entry. I obliged and soon all coherent thought was lost as our mouths meshed together. I wasn't sure where mine ended and hers began. Soon, my hands began to wander and one of them came to rest on Emily's lower back, lifting her shirt slightly so that it came into contact with bare skin, while the other found the back of Emily's neck. Emily released a low groan as my fingers tangled in her hair.

The sound acted as a motivation to coax me further and without hesitation I pushed my body forward, easing Emily slowly backwards until she was lying on the bed with my body pressed against hers, pinning her down. The temperature in the room had now risen several degrees just from the heat radiating between us.

I pulled my lips away for a moment, to catch my breath, and was met with Emily's eyes burning into my own. We both breathed heavily as we stared at one another. Emily's cheeks were flushed with red and I was sure that mine looked the same. I was mesmerized by her. She was magnificent, the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

Emily wrapped both her arms around my neck and pulled me down, crashing our lips together once more. As a response, I shifted my body slightly and wedged my thigh between her legs to meet her centre. A low moan escaped from her throat again and once again, the sound was like a trigger and I pressed myself hard against her. Her hands left my neck and gripped tightly onto my hips, pulling me into her.

At this point my head was swimming in red. All I could see was Emily: her eyes, her hair, her lips, and whatever skin wasn't covered in clothing. I pulled my lips from hers once more and began placing kisses along her neck. She tilted her head back to allow me more room to do so. Emily's leg that was trapped between my own shifted up and pressed, hard, into my crotch.

A low groan escaped, again, but from me this time. I began shifting my hips up and down and Emily did the same. A whole new jolt of electricity surged through my body as Emily and I grinded our bodies together. I used one hand to hold myself up while the other gripped tightly to Emily's waist. The throbbing at my centre continued to grow along with the wetness. My underwear had now been soaked through and a heavy flow of liquid continued to be released. If her body language was any sign, I would say yes, but still I wondered if Emily was as wet as I was.

"God, Emily!" I said, breathlessly, still grinding against her, "I think these knickers are done for." I chuckled.

Emily chuckled too and her cheeks darkened slightly as she said. "About that, you don't happen to have an extra set you could loan me, do you?"

I giggled and kissed her lips. "As a matter of fact, I do. They're new, you can keep them."

She smiled by way of thanks before reaching her hand up and grabbing me round the neck, pulling me into her again. We continued our rhythm and before long my hand had found its way up Emily's shirt and cupped over her bra. I squeezed gently and Emily moaned appreciatively. Before today I had thought Emily's laugh was the best thing I had ever heard, but that sound was much, much better!

The throbbing between my legs grew again and in response I started to grind even harder into Emily. She reacted quickly and began to do the same, pulling my hips further into her. Soon sounds were escaping us both and I hung my head close to hers, breathing heavily in her ear. I watched Emily's face as I grinded into her and I knew she was close. So I increased my pressure once again. Emily pushed her thigh up further again and I felt a powerful jolt surge through my body. I picked up speed.

It seemed like only seconds passed before my body temperature spiked one last time and I came crashing over the edge, my centre throbbing violently. Emily let out a high squeal as she did the same. Ok… new favourite sound. I wondered, vaguely, how many times she would reset the scale.

I shifted my body slightly and came to rest half on my bed, half on Emily. I rested my head on her shoulder and wrapped an arm around her waist. I tangled one leg between hers and cuddled into her as far as I could.

"That was…Wow." Emily said, "If that's what it feels like with clothes on then I can only imagine!" Wait… I'm her first? I looked curiously at her.

"You mean you've never…" I asked.

"No, I've never!" she giggled, "Have you? I mean, other than Effy."

I shook my head. "No." I answered, "But I do know what you mean, with Eff it was never like that!"

Emily smiled, smugly, at me and I giggled.

"Well someone's proud of herself." I said, playfully.

Emily smiled at me again and placed a light kiss on my forehead. I kissed her tenderly on the lips and returned to my position in her arms. We lay there, silently, for a while and I drew patterns on the exposed skin between her t-shirt and jeans. I noticed Emily's breathing had changed and looked up at her to find her sound asleep. I smiled to myself and kissed her forehead before lying back down and getting comfortable. Before long, sleep found me as well and I drifted off feeling happier than I had ever felt in my entire life.


	13. Twin Time

**AN: Ok guys. Firstly, I would like to say I'm sorry for the delay. Secondly, I would like to say that this chapter isn't at all what I hoped it would be. I had a bit of a difficult time. Explanation for both: I'm super sick. I just got the energy back up to be able to write but my brain is still kind of shit, so this was a tiny bit of a struggle.** **I hope it's not too terrible. **

**Also, I don't remember your username, but the person who asked if I was British... No, I'm not. I can only wish. I do have some British friends, though. And I watch a lot of British TV... so it helps. :) **

**Alright, so. Here's some Emily/Katie time. Hope you enjoy. See you next time. :)**

Emily Fitch – 16 years old

I'm woken up by a loud banging coming from not far away. When I open my eyes and am suddenly reminded of where I am. A wide grin spreads across my face as I turn over to see Naomi. Her hair is sticking out in several directions and her nose is scrunched up in annoyance as she squirms around, the banging slowly pulling her out of her sleep. Oh right, the banging! I reluctantly pull my gaze from Naomi's face and get up from the bed. My annoyance peaks as I make my way towards the door and the noise.

"Alright! Fuck! I'm coming!" I shout. I feel instantly guilty when I hear a loud thud behind me and spin around to find Naomi sprawled across the floor looking shocked and confused. I bolt to her side immediately.

"Oh god! I'm sorry; I didn't think! Are you ok?" I ask as I brush her hair from her face and hold her cheeks, forcing her to look at me. I'm a bit shocked myself when I find her gorgeous smile beaming back at me.

"I am now." She says, grinning widely, "Although I'd appreciate it if you keep the shouting to a minimum when I'm asleep; hitting the floor isn't the best way to wake up."

Without thinking, I just start peppering kisses all over her face. "I… promise… I'll… never… shout… again." I say between kisses. I feel immediately flustered when I realize how forward I'm being and I pull away.

It's so easy just being with Naomi. I never think about anything. I want to do something and I just do it; I want to say something and I just say it. But I've got to stop. Mum could still take her away from me in a second. I can't let myself fall for her when she can still be taken from me. I can't let myself love her when I know I can lose her. I'm just not ready yet.

I'm flooded with guilt again when I chance a look into Naomi's eyes. She looks disappointed and hurt.

It's a welcome distraction when I hear Katie's voice shouting from the hallway. Katie? How does she know where Naomi lives? I head over to the door and jerk it open, forgetting to check my appearance.

"Katie, how did you…" I start.

"Fucking Hell!" Katie interrupts, "Did you sleep at all last night? You look like microwaved shit!"

I look down at myself and see that I'm still wearing yesterday's clothes, which are now bunched up and wrinkled. The memories of last night flood into my brain again and a wide smile spreads across my face. Who am I kidding? How am I supposed to control my feelings for Naomi when I can't even control my thoughts? What have I gotten myself into?

I let out a deep sigh and turn my attention back to my sister. "How exactly did you know where to find me?" I ask, the memory of my promise to spend the day with my sister suddenly reappearing.

"Effy." She says, simply.

Effy, huh? I still think it's weird that those two are suddenly mates. I shrug, but make a mental note to grill Katie about it later. There's a long, very awkward silence before Katie speaks again.

"So," she says, clapping her hands together and grinning broadly, "Twin day begins in…" She pulls out her phone and hits a button to illuminate the screen, checking the time. "forty-five minutes. So make your kissy face and get ready. Dad's waiting outside; he's going to drop us off at Mama Fitch's. We're going swimming."

"Why the time frame if we're just going to Mama Fitch's?" I ask.

"Pizza" she answers, simply, and turns to leave the room. Ok, yeah. She and Effy have definitely been have definitely been hanging out. I turn to face Naomi and find her smirking at me.

"Looks like Eff is rubbing off on her." She says. I'm thankful to see that she's smiling and not still upset about my brush off.

"Exactly what I was thinking," I smile at her. She finally stands up from the floor and closes the space between us, wrapping her arms around me. I squeeze her back as tightly as I can and breathe deeply, letting her scent wash over me. My head goes fuzzy. Jesus, how am I going to do this? I release the hug and take another deep breath, this time to clear my head.

A twin day is just what I need. I need to talk to my sister. I need someone to help me figure this shit out.

Since I don't have any clothes to change into and we're going to Mama Fitch's (where I'm currently staying) anyway, I only take about five minutes in the bathroom to brush my hair and wash my face. The rest of my forty minutes are spent clinging to Naomi and kissing her until we're both breathless. I know I shouldn't. I know it's not helping me figure things out, but I have no control with Naomi. My pause button always seems to be disabled when she's around.

I hear Katie screaming for me to "Hurry the fuck up, Bitch" from downstairs and I drag myself from Naomi's lips and rush down the stairs without saying goodbye. I'm only halfway down the stairs when I have to fight the urge to turn and run back up them. I feel as if Naomi sucked out my soul with that last kiss and I won't get it back until she touches me again. But I squash it down and continue down the stairs, knowing full well how much of a bitch I am. An image of Naomi's hurt face flickers behind my eyes and I feel like kicking myself. _She doesn't deserve this, Emily! Get your shit together!_

Katie flashes me a weird look when I reach the bottom of the stairs and I know it means she can tell something's up. I shake my head at her.

"I so need this!" I say to her, communicating my cry for help more with my eyes than I ever possibly could with words. And my sister, yet again, manages to be a saint. She throws her arm around my shoulder and kisses my cheek.

"Good to know you still need me, Emsy!" she says with a wide grin, and drags me out towards the car. "Dad wanted to talk to you, by the way. That's why he offered to drive us, even though it's a short walk." She adds on the way. Just before we reach the car I'm stopped in my tracks when something large and firm slams into me.

"I'm so glad you're alright, Emsy! I thought you'd never come out of that room!" I hear Dad's muffled voice booming through his chest as I'm squeezed against him. He releases me and I catch my breath.

"Good to see you too, Dad." I say as I look up at him. He looks exhausted, which I can only imagine is a result of spending days trying to reason with Mum. I still wonder how they ended up together: Dad with his unconditional love and infectious joy and Mum with her need to control everything and her irrational behaviour when she can't. I know they love each other, and somehow they make it work; but I still wonder how he puts up with her.

I hear a relatively loud sniffling noise and it pulls my attention away from Dad. My eyes follow the sound to find James sitting in the back seat with the window rolled down. Tears are streaming down his cheeks and his bloodshot eyes are boring into me. His voice cracks as he speaks.

"I didn't mean to, Emily! I'm sorry!" he wails. My heart breaks and tears flood my own eyes. I launch myself forward and wrench open the door, flinging my arms around my younger brother. I squeeze him tightly for a long moment before pulling back and holding his shoulders, looking him in the eye.

"Hey. Listen to me." I say, making sure I have his attention before I continue, "What happened wasn't your fault. That was a huge secret to keep; I shouldn't have asked it of you. Besides, Mum would have found out sooner or later, anyway."

"But I told! I wasn't supposed to…" James started to protest, but I held up a hand to stop him.

"It doesn't matter, okay? I couldn't hide it forever. This problem is mine and Mum's, alright? It's nothing for you to be concerned over."

James nods sheepishly and I ruffle his hair as I step back out of the car. Dad motions for us all to get in and I hop in front while Katie joins James in the back. After a quick stop at Gordon McPhearson's to drop off James, we're outside Mama Fitch's.

"Go on inside, Katiekins." Dad says as he switches off the car, "I want to speak to Emily for a moment."

Katie obliges without protest and Dad and I are left alone. I sigh audibly as I pray to every god I can think of that he's not about to ask me to come home. My shoulders drop with relief when he speaks.

"Don't worry, love. I know you're not ready to come home yet." He says, "I just wanted you to know that I want you to be happy. And if this Naomi lass is a nice girl and she treats you right, then she's ok by me."

I can't stop the tears that stream down my face as happiness and anger flood through me simultaneously: Happiness because Dad, Katie, and James are all so wonderful. I feel so lucky to have them. And anger at myself because even though they are so wonderful and supportive, I still let Mum get to me. I still let it hurt me that she doesn't support me, even though I have all this support already.

I know it's stupid but it's always been this way. I've watched TV shows where the mother and daughter have this incredible bond. They talk about things and can tell each other anything without fear of judgement. The mother is a protector and a best friend wrapped into one. Those shows always make me cry. I thought maybe that didn't exist in real life, until I went to Naomi's house. Both Gina and Anthea are like the mothers in those shows. That's all I've ever wanted.

I take a deep breath and start gathering my thoughts about what Katie and I have to talk about. I say my goodbyes to Dad with a long hug and an "I love you." And make my way into the house. Katie is already in a lounge chair around the pool by the time I finish changing.

"Don't waste any time do you?" I grin at her as I make my way towards the pool. I drop the robe I'm wearing onto the back of a chair as I walk by and dive straight into the water. The pool is heated and the warmth of the water rushes over me. I resurface and wipe the hair from my face as I look up at Katie.

"Could say the same to you." She says, smirking at me.

"Well, like I said, I need this." I say. I swim over to the shallow end of the pool and lean my arms back on the edge of the pool, kicking my legs lightly in the water as Katie enters the pool slowly from the ladder. She mimics my position a couple of feet away and lets out a deep sigh.

"Alright then," she says, "I'm all ears. What's up?"

There is a long silence as I try to gather my thoughts. How exactly am I supposed to explain this to someone else? I can barely make sense of it myself.

"I..." I let out a deep sigh, "I think I love her, Katie." Katie laughs loudly. Not exactly the response I was expecting…

"Well that much is obvious!" she says, amusedly, there is a short pause before she continues, "and this is a problem, because?"

There's another long silence as I try to work out how to explain myself to Katie. Because… because it's fucking terrifying! That's why!

"Because, I've never loved someone before; because it's scary enough being different without having any control of my feelings; because Mum will never let me be with her!"

These long silences are starting to get a bit uncomfortable. I wait for Katie to respond. Finally she does.

"Look, Em. You are who you are, ok? There's nothing anyone can do about it. You can't, Mum can't, no one can, so get used to it! The sooner you do, the sooner you can be happy, and the sooner Mum can start to. She's gonna have to, you know, whether she likes it or not. So be with Naomi. Be happy. And stop worrying about Mum. I know you want her to be all supportive and shit but she is who she is. She can't change you and you can't change her. So you're both going to have to get used to it." She's lecturing me now.

She's right. She's absolutely right. Mum wants to change me and I hate it. I never realized I wanted to do the same to her. Instantly, I feel guilty. Katie must sense this as within seconds she's got her arms wrapped around my neck.

"Just give it time, yeah?" she says into my hair and I nod as a response.

I don't know how she did it, but somehow Katie's managed to make me feel better about everything. Somehow, she's fed me the courage I need to give this a shot. With a little peace of mind now I just want to think about something else for a while, so I change the subject.

"So what's going on with Effy?" I ask, "You two are like BFFs all of a sudden. You've hated each other for years…"

Katie shrugs. "She's very protective of Naomi." She says, "She just came up to me randomly at my locker one day asking about you. Said she wanted to make sure you weren't some slag who would break her best friend's heart. I slapped her for calling you a slag and she invited me for a coffee." Katie chuckles through her words.

I chuckle as well. "Interesting way to make friends." I say.

"Yeah well," she says, "we keep each other company. Our other halves have been a bit preoccupied lately." She teases.

I grin at her. "Well I'm glad you're getting along anyway. I don't think I could handle my girlfriend's best friend and my sister hating each other."

I'm not even shocked when I say it. I'm not sure at which point in the conversation I made up my mind, but there's no denying how sure I am now. I'm going to stop fighting it. The next time I see Naomi, I'm making it official. I'm going to be with her. Katie's right. If I keep being afraid, I'll never get anywhere.

An ear splitting grin spreads across Katie's face. "About time!" she says as she climbs up the latter and out of the pool. She wrings out her hair and wraps her robe around herself. "I'm feeling peckish, let's get that pizza."

I follow her example and let her lead us into the house. We spend the next few hours eating pizza and playing Wii until we pass out on the couch. I'm woken the next morning by the smell of coffee. I open my eyes to see Katie holding a cup in front of my face.

"Good morning, glory! Coffee?" she says.

"Thanks" I say and I take the cup.

"Drink up," she says, "you've got somewhere to be." She winks at me.

I finish my coffee, shower, and dress. I make my way back downstairs with a mission in mind and find Katie waiting for me at the front door. She holds out her arms to me and I fall into them.

"Go get her." She says.

I hug my sister for a long moment before letting go and heading out the door. I reach the end of the driveway and turn around to find Katie watching me from the door. I wave back at her before turning back on my heels. A deep sigh escapes my chest.

"Here goes." I say to myself and start down the street, headed back to Naomi.


	14. If It Makes You Happy

**AN: Hey guys! Miss me? Ok, so you all know that in the last chapter Emily was on her way to Naomi's to let her know how she feels. Let's see how that goes, shall we?**

Naomi Campbell – 17 years old

"Naomiiiii!" Mum yells for me from somewhere downstairs. It sounds like she's in the kitchen. I drop my pencil on top of my sketchbook I had been drawing in and lift myself off the bed. I had been lying on my bed in only my knickers and a t-shirt so I pull on a pair of pyjama pants from the floor and head downstairs.

"Yeah, Mum?" I call from the bottom step and wait for her voice to tell me where she called me from.

"In here, dear." She calls from the kitchen. Thought so.

I enter the kitchen to see her standing at the counter chopping vegetables. There's chicken sizzling away in a skillet on the stovetop along with a large pan of water boiling away. I sigh. She must want help with dinner. Not that I would mind, usually, I just don't like to be disturbed when I'm in art mode.

"Hey, Mum. What's up?" I say as I pad into the kitchen and place a kiss on her cheek. She reaches and moves over a pile of carrots and a knife onto another cutting board.

"Do you mind, dear? Anthea suggested we have a little Karaoke party tonight, so I decided to make an early dinner. I could use an extra hand."

"Well," I sigh out, "I suppose if we're doing Karaoke I won't be able to finish my drawing anyway, so sure."

There's no college tomorrow, so even though I'm very into my current project; I can always finish it later. So I slide in next to Mum and chop through some carrots, squash, and potatoes and drop them all into the pot of boiling water. I then set the table at Mum's request. I'm about to go back up to my room and put a few more touches on my drawing when Mum stops me with a "Just a moment, dear." I turn just in time to catch her car keys being thrown at me. I look up quizzically and she grins.

"Can't have a party without something sweet, can we? Nip down to the bakery really quickly and grab us something lush, maybe a coconut gateau!"

My face breaks into a wide grin and I can't get out the door fast enough. Coconut cake is my favourite! I slip back upstairs and put on some jeans and my Converse. Well I can't very well go out in public in my pyjamas can I? I jet back downstairs and out through the door. Or at least that was the plan, but as soon as I step through the door I run smack into something… no, someone.

"Emilly?" I stare down at her, wondering why she is standing on my front porch. I hadn't expected to see her until college. She was supposed to be having twin time. I snap out of my trance and extend a hand to help her up.

"Sorry." I say sheepishly, realizing that regardless of why she's here, I did just knock her on her ass.

"S'ok." She says as she brushes herself off, "I'm to blame. It's not like you were expecting to hit a human wall on your way through your front door."

I chuckle. "I suppose not, but still." I say as I reach out and help her straighten herself up, moving her hair out of her face. "So two questions: One, are you ok? And two, what are you doing here? I thought you were hanging out with Katie?"

Now it's Emily's turn to look sheepish apparently. Well, a bit more than sheepish… Embarrassed? Nervous? Either way it's fucking adorable.

"Yeah well you see… I sort of… well, I missed you." A blush breaks into her cheeks and she can't seem to meet my eyes. "So, Katie cut me loose to come see you. Oh and yes, I'm fine."

I can't help the smile that breaks onto my face. She blew off Katie because she missed me? I know how important Katie is to her, and she would rather be with me. Ok yeah, so my head is swelling to ridiculous proportions right now. I snap myself out of it when I realize that I've been grinning like a loon for several moments and Emily is staring at me like I've grown a second head.

"Great!" I say, failing miserably at trying to contain my excitement. "Come on then" I motion for her to join me as I make my way to the car. "Mum's making dinner and she's sent me to buy a gateau for dessert."

Emily's smile immediately grows wider. "Ooo! What kind?" She asks. We both open our doors and get into the car before I answer.

"Coconut!" I say, excitedly as I start the car and we pull out of the drive.

"Hmm." Emily says, "I've never had coconut cake before. Is it any good?"

I try hard to contain myself and not be one of those people who acts like a nutter when you are virgin to their favourite thing. You know, they usually stop whatever they're doing and get right in your face screaming something like: "You've never had Lobster? Oh my god! You've never lived!" I fail miserably, however, and come out saying.

"Oh my god! It's glorious! Bloody orgasmic! I would not even be remotely shocked if you started moaning and convulsing at the table!" Jesus, did I really just say that? Just fucking shoot me now! Much to my relief Emily doesn't look at me like I'm barmy but just bursts into giggles.

"Wow. That good, huh?" she says after she's done laughing at my display of crazy. I park the car and we both get out. I smile at her over the roof of the car.

"I'm telling you, Em," I say, "It's better than sex!" I doubt that's true at all, though. Mine and Emily's grope fest last week was by far the best thing ever. I could only imagine what sex with her would be like. I'm sure even fucking ecstasy wouldn't compare.

My cheeks start to burn and I break eye contact. Jesus, Campbell, pull it together! Fucking spaz! I chance a sideways glance at Emily and feel a little better. She's blushing and staring at her feet too. So maybe I'm not that much of a spaz.

We pick out a cake with toasted coconut flakes all over it and a whipped cream filling and head back to mine. When we open the door there are voices coming from the kitchen telling me that dinner is ready and everyone is getting their drinks. Effy steps into view and stops.

"Oh, Hi Emily! When did you get here?" she asks, her Effy smirk on her face.

"Just as Naomi was leaving," Emily says, "So I rode along to the bakery."

Effy cocks her head to the side a little, her smirk still playing on her features. "Cool." She says, and stares for another second before turning on her heels and yelling loudly, "Gina! We need another setting! We have company!"

I look over to Emily, "Hope you're hungry." I say, knowing that even if she wasn't Mum would make her eat.

She grins at me. "I'm always hungry." She says.

I laugh as I remember eating lunch with her at college. She's like a bottomless pit. I have no idea how she eats so much and looks the way she does. We make our way into the dining room and I immediately walk over to the table and pick up the two remaining empty cups.

"What are you drinking, Em?" I ask. She says she'll have ice water and so I go into the kitchen and get our drinks, deciding that I'll have ice water as well. As I'm standing at the sink Effy comes up behind me and speaks directly into my ear.

"Bad move bringing her on Karaoke night, Nai." She says. I turn off the tap and face her, holding a cup in each hand.

"Why?" I ask. What could possibly go wrong on karaoke night? Emily already knows how we all behave when drunk, so it's not like they're going to embarrass me.

Effy is smirking again. She shrugs at me and puts on an innocent face. "Well, because her voice is incredible. It even makes me melt. You've already fallen pretty hard. I know you, Naomi. With a voice like hers, you'd be her fucking slave."

Effy turns and glides away, knowing what kind of information she's just provided. I swallow hard. Emily can sing? I already abandon all coherent thought when she's around and now she sings too? Jesus, I'll probably end up drooling!

I try not to think about it and head back into the dining room. Karaoke isn't until after dessert. Maybe I can try to prepare myself. Maybe if I already know she has a good voice then maybe I can keep myself from going catatonic.

See, when I was ten I had this puppy dog crush on one of Mum's hippie friends. He was just really charming and every time he was around I would turn into a fucking zombie! I would just sit and stare at him all glossy eyed whenever he entered a room. One day we went out to a sports bar on a karaoke night and he sang "Bad Moon Rising" by C.C.R. His voice was amazing. And as soon as he got off stage I went from zombie to leech. I kept following him around and begging him to sing. I told him I would do anything. I was probably a bit frightening, especially when he tried to get away from me and I clawed at him like I was a lion at meal time and he was a zebra trying to save itself. It was definitely the most embarrassing thing I've ever done.

I'm not a socially awkward ten year old anymore and this thing with Emily isn't a pubescent stalker crush, so I'm not concerned about behaving that way again. But I do know that I've never lost my love of a beautiful voice; and I already can't control my actions around Emily. So I'm still afraid of what I might do.

I spend all of dinner trying to stay calm and figure out how I'm going to act cool if Emily decides to sing. So when Mum brings out the cake I'm glad for the distraction. I've got coconut cake in front of me and until it's gone, nothing else matters! Well, usually nothing else matters, but today one thing does. I want to know what Emily thinks of my favourite dessert.

Mum cuts and hands out the cake while Anthea fills cups with milk and then they sit back down. The rest of the table quietly starts eating their cake, but I wait as I stare intently at Emily, waiting for her to take a bite. I smile lightly as I watch her. My earlier comment must have stuck with her because she's practically bursting with excitement. She cuts into her cake with her fork and places the bite in her mouth, before she even pulls her fork from her mouth she reacts.

"Oh my god!" She moans loudly with her mouth full, rolling her eyes closed. Wow! Ok, that was sexy! My cheeks are burning again and I try to distract myself from Emily, who has no idea what she does to me. I look at Effy, who is smirking knowingly at me. I scowl at her and shift my attention to both Mum and Anthea who both look like deer in headlights, staring at Emily. It successfully distracts me and I burst into giggles.

"I told you!" I say to Emily, though I'm still look at Mum and Anthea. I take a bite of my own cake and savour the taste. God, this shit is good! I look back at Emily who has now composed herself and is looking and Mum and Anthea like a child who's just been scolded.

"Sorry." She chuckles nervously, "I've never had it before and it's really good!"

Mum smiles at her and nods, being used to my reactions to tasty foods, but Anthea just stares on as if Emily's face was rearranging and she just couldn't look away. I chuckle again and lean over, bumping shoulders with Emily to lighten her nerves.

"So who's ready for karaoke!?" Mum shouts and claps her hands together, just as soon as we've all finished our cake. I look nervously over at Emily and find her with an ear splitting grin. Shit!

"I love karaoke!" she shouts gleefully. It's ok, I tell myself. Maybe Effy was exaggerating. And even if she wasn't, maybe you'll act normal!

Everyone except Effy skips joyfully into the living room where Mum has already set up the karaoke machine. I tell Mum that I just want to watch this time, knowing that my voice isn't all that great and not wanting to embarrass myself in front of Emily. I settle down into an arm chair as Effy enters the room juggling two bottles of wine, a bottle of spiced run and a six pack of hard cider. She sets it all down on the table and pops open a cider, handing it to me. I smile happily and tag a swig, loving that my best friend knows what I want without having to ask.

Mum grabs a bottle of wine and takes several large gulps before handing the bottle to Anthea who does the same. Effy obliges Emily's request for a cider and pops open two more, handing one to Emily before settling next to her on the sofa with her own. Mum and Anthea sing an off key duet of "You're So Vain" while I watch Effy and Emily flip through our collection of karaoke discs trying to pick a song. Effy follows up their performance with a pretty good rendition of Amy Winehouse's "Back To Black" while Emily keeps trying to make a selection. I smile to myself as I watch her and try to figure out how she manages to make everything she does look so cute.

Emily's expression of concentration suddenly changes and her face breaks into a wide grin as she pulls out a disc from its sleeve. She sits the disc in her lap as she waits for Effy to finish and when she does we all applaud. It really was rather good. Effy bows dramatically heads back to the sofa, passing Emily as she makes her way to the machine, twirling the disc on her finger.

Emily is still smiling when she puts the cd into the machine and presses the buttons to select the right track. The screen flashes on and the song title scrolls across the screen: "If It Makes You Happy" by Sheryl Crowe. I smile when I see it. I love this song! I've sang it myself a few times when I was in a particularly good mood. At this point, I'm so eager to hear how Emily sings the song that I forget I'm supposed to have an extra hold on myself. And as soon as Emily starts singing I'm smiling like an idiot, my eyes glued to her.

Effy is probably smirking at me, I think absently, but I can't tear my eyes away from Emily to find out. Her voice really is spectacular! The more energetic chorus starts and just as the music picks up, so does Emily

. She bounces on her feet a couple of times and swings her arms above her head as she sings "If it makes you happy" leaning back a little as she holds out the last note a little longer. I actually feel my eyes gloss over. She drops her arms a bit and lifts her shoulders slightly along with "it can't be that bad". My smile grows a bit wider. She repeats her motions again for the next line and then turns to face me as she sings the last. "Then why the hell are you so sad". Her whole face is glowing and I can tell she loves what she's doing. She winks at me on the last word and I notice that my heart is beating rather heavily as it picks up a few more paces.

I continue to watch in awe as she goes through the rest of the song and on the last line when the music slows my feet move on their own accord and I'm crossing the room towards Emily. The music stops just as I reach her and I wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her tightly into me. Without a single thought of what I'm doing I crash my lips into hers. This should be a private moment but in my current state I don't even care that we're in the middle of the room with everyone watching. She kisses me back and I grip onto her even tighter. After several feverish moments we break apart and I grab her face. I meet her eyes and the overpowering feeling I had moments ago intensifies.

"I love you." It slips out of my mouth without my permission but as soon as I say it, I know it's true. I've known for a while that I could be but in this moment there is not a single doubt. I am unconditionally and irrevocably in love with Emily Fitch.

**AN: *squeals* Hmm, not what Emily had planned, but I guess that works! Lol. Hope you liked it! See you next time!**


	15. Surprises

**AN: Hey guys! I hope my updates are frequent enough for you. I pretty much have a heart attack when I see an update for one of the stories I'm following in my inbox, so I try not to make you wait too long. Anyways, Finally someone commented on Effy. I was wondering how long it would take! So in this chapter I'm mixing it up a bit and letting Effy have the stage for just a little bit. I was gonna put it off for a bit, but this seemed like just as good a time as any. Hope you like the twist. :) **

**Also. Yes, I know. The last bit from chapter 14 was very Twilight-ish but to be entirely honest, That line from Twilight is just plain beautiful and I couldn't have said it better if I tried. *shrugs***

Emily Fitch – 16 years old

Did I just hear that right? Pinch me! Someone fucking pinch me! I must be dreaming. I shake my head several times and remind myself to breathe. I'm pretty sure I'm asleep… or dead. Dead seems more like it, even my dreams are never this good. I reach up and feel my face. Ok, still solid. I take a few deep breaths. Ok, I can still do that. I check my pulse, knowing it has to have stopped. But sure enough, I put my fingers to my pulse point and it's still beating (rather quickly I might add). Ok so I'm alive, maybe it is just a really good dream. I pinch myself as hard as I can and wince. Ok, I'm awake… So this is real. No, not possible. Way too good to be real.

I snap myself out of my reverie and realize that Naomi is still staring at me and she looks concerned. Oh fuck! I've been a total mong for the past… how long have I been standing here? I guess I'd better say something.

"What?" Oh for fucks sake, Emily! What? You fucking heard her! You know damn well what she said. You're such a bloody spaz!

Naomi's feet seem to have just become very interesting to her. She mumbles something I can't quite make out as she wrings her hands in front of her.

"What?" I repeat again, this time because I really didn't hear her. A not so subtle groan is heard from behind me.

"Oh, for fuck's sake! She said she loves you!" Effy states exasperatedly. I turn and stare at her dumbly as she gets up from her seat and crosses the room. I watch her grab an arm of both her and Naomi's mother and drag them from the room. They follow after her but their eyes don't leave the middle of the room where Naomi and I are standing, their mouths hanging agape. My gaze follows them until they are out of sight and I turn back to Naomi to find that her intense stare is back.

I gulp audibly as she gazes at me, suddenly feeling very self-conscious. Oh right, breathe, Emily. Her eyes leave mine for only a second as she finds my hands and as she laces our fingers I'm hit with deep blues again. This is the first time I've seen Naomi like this. Sure, she's stared at me before and it always ended in our lips meeting but this gaze was different. Usually it was like her eyes were asking for what she wanted, but now she looked so sure. Like she would take what she wanted regardless of my opinion. It was almost frightening, but more than anything it was fucking sexy. She cleared her throat.

"Emily, you are amazing. I've never met anyone like you." There are tears shining in her eyes and she takes a few broken breaths, "This is scaring the shit out of me to be honest. I completely lost it just then. I got up and kissed you right in front of everyone and then it just fell out of my mouth and I was barely even aware it was happening. But I knew it was true. I said it and there wasn't even a question that I meant it. I love you, Emily!"

The tears were running down her cheeks now and I vaguely realized my cheeks were streaked with them too. Oh god, this is unreal. I came over here to tell Naomi how I feel and before I get a chance she tells me first. So why was I clamming up? Say it back, you mong! That's why you came here in the first place!

"I-I… I" I cleared my throat and tried again but nothing came out but air. Jesus, Emily, you can't even bloody speak! I wanted so badly to say it but it just wouldn't come out. My frustration with myself was building, and so since I couldn't speak I did the next best thing and launched myself at her, hoping that I could say it without having to speak.

When our lips met it was unlike anything I had ever experienced. I poured my entire soul into the kiss, wanting Naomi to swallow it whole. It was hers. A moan escaped her lips and it only urged me on. My hands gripped tightly to the back of her neck and I drank her in, wanting to take just as much as I gave. The kiss continued to intensify and I felt myself losing control. Quickly I jumped back to reality.

"Nai…" I said breathlessly as I pulled away. I looked into her eyes and felt my stomach tighten. Jesus! Her eyes were dark and more intense than I'd ever seen them. I struggled to continue as I caught my breath. "Sorry… I just… we're in your living room…" I finally got out. She tore her eyes from me and looked around as if she had forgotten where we were, which really, she probably had.

"Fuck" she said, sounding frustrated. She pulled away from me and sat up. I hadn't even realized we had ended up on the floor. I sat up myself and leaned back against the sofa, letting my head fall back on the cushion. I sat like this until my breathing evened out and I raised my head again to find Naomi sitting in the same chair she had been in earlier, curled up in a foetal position with her head against her knees. Immediately I was concerned.

"Hey, you ok?" I said cautiously. Her head shot up and she looked at me. Her face reddened.

"Yeah," she said, "Just um… restraining myself." She mumbled the last bit. It was my turn to blush.

"Sorry about that," I said sheepishly, "I couldn't seem to talk so I just sort of-"

"It's ok, Em." She interrupted, "Maybe we should take a walk."

I nodded as a response. It was windy so it would help me 'cool off,' something that Naomi obviously needed as well, probably more than I did. And I knew we had a lot to talk about. The walk would give us both time to clear our heads. Naomi silently got up and walked to the front door. She slipped on her shoes and picked up her jumper. I followed her example and we stepped out into the cold.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Effy Stonem – 17 years old

I left Mum and Gina in the study and told them to stay there before leaving through the back door. I figured it didn't matter that I had nowhere to go, I could just walk around and have a good think about everything. And if I got bored, I could always go see Katie. She was no Naomi, but she was ok company. I had to hang out with someone, didn't I?

See, I'd never really seen the point in getting to know anyone around here. I always had Naomi, so I didn't really see the point. I saw her often enough even though we lived apart, and we were on the phone practically every second that we weren't together apart from school and coursework. Mum even got me my own mobile at like 10 years old just so I wouldn't tie up the line. It was always me and Naomi, full on all the time.

I thought it would be the best thing ever when Naomi moved here; and for about a week, it was. That was until she discovered bloody Emily. I always figured that if Naomi spent enough time in Bristol that they would find each other. Neither of them even noticed the other staring at them at the beach when we were kids. I had noticed, though. And I knew then the same thing that is beyond obvious now. Emily meant nothing but trouble for me.

Ok, so maybe I'm being a bit childish. But I haven't actually expressed any of this to Naomi. So it's not like I'm being actively selfish. I'm still keeping it to myself. Well, myself and Katie. Naomi took her best friend away too, so she gets it.

I'm trying to get over it, really. This is so out of character for me. I usually at least act like I don't give a fuck, even if I do. But I'm finding this one to be a bit of a challenge. I mean, Naomi is mine! She's always been mine. And before you jump to conclusions, yes Naomi and I have had sex, but no, I'm not in love with her. I mean sure I'm a bit possessive and the idea of losing her is making me mental… Ok, so I might love her more than I should.

But to be honest I don't know. It's not as if my parents are very good role models of what love is supposed to be like.

I flick the fag I had been puffing to the ground and begin mumbling to myself as I tick off my fingers, trying to figure out my feelings.

"Here's what I know. I could deny it but I'm jealous of Emily, plain and simple." I tick off a finger. "I love Naomi, even if I'm not sure exactly how." Another finger. "Naomi loves Emily, not only has she said it but it's obvious the way she looks at her." Another. "Emily loves her too. She looks at Naomi the same way Naomi looks at her."

I pull out another fag as I think about the way they look at each other. I reach up to light it as I think how much I want someone to look at me that way. I close my eyes as I imagine it and the image I see makes my eyes pop back open. My cigarette falls to ground along with my jaw. Where the fuck did that come from? I shake my head as I realize that I don't need to think about Naomi anymore, my subconscious had made my feelings very clear. So I wasn't in love with _Naomi_, then. Now I just had to figure out my feelings about someone else.

"Katie?" I questioned myself, staring blankly ahead of me as I tried to wrap my head around itself.

**AN: So Keffy's been part of the plan from the very beginning. I wasn't originally a Keffy fan, but some of the stories I've read have made me love it (especially 99 problems, fucking brilliant, that is!) and when I needed someone for Effy I just couldn't resist putting her with Katie. **

**Sorry about this chapter being so short... It's sort of a filler. Ok, well not sort of, it is! And before you ask, Keffy will be getting a little bit more spotlight, but the story is still about Naomily. Eventually everything will blend together. ;) Hope you enjoyed. See you next time! **


	16. Look at me, I'm a Wanker

**AN: Hey guys! Sorry for the gap, I got a bit distracted! Alright, so it took me a while to decide where to go next and I figured that we needed a little bit more from Effy right now. So here we go! Also, I'm starting to lose track of time... So I stopped caring how old everyone is now. When it's important, I'll let you know, but as of right now all that matters is they're teenagers.**

Effy Stonem

I woke up two hours ago, but I still haven't gotten out of bed. I'm hungry and my bladder feels like it's going to burst; but I just can't bring myself to move. There's just too much going on in my head. All I've been able to think about since my little walk was Katie. If I'm honest, she occupied much of my thoughts before then; but now she's just completely overtaken my mind.

I giggle to myself as I remember how we officially met. I've known who she is for years, and I've always found her intriguing. She's just so fiery. Over the past few years I've been watching her more and more because she's just so bloody fascinating. But until the new development that is "Naomily" I just never really found a reason to talk to her. But when I did she became even more fascinating than she had been before.

"Hey! Fitch! I wanna talk to you!" I had shouted at her as I ran to catch up. This bitch is making me run. I don't run.

The last bell of the day had rung several minutes before and the corridor was pretty much empty as everyone had flown to the exits like bats out of Hell. I finally caught up to her at her locker slammed it shut. Yeah, rude, I know. But I was trying to look intimidating at this particular moment in time, so I felt it was justified. Her eyes turned to meet mine and we glared at each other.

The fact that Katie Fitch was fascinating didn't make me forget the history between us. Years ago, I had a one night stand with some bloke who had broken her heart a week beforehand and Katie went completely barmy. The bloke hadn't given a fuck about her; and I hadn't given a fuck about him. Yet Katie still managed to take it all personally and told everyone that I "Stole her boyfriend". It was inaccurate in every possible sense; but for weeks her friends followed me around calling me a slag. I don't care what anyone thinks, it was just bloody irritating. You try having people whisper "slag" in your ear while reading your favourite novel and see how long you can be patient!

"What the fuck!?" Katie shouted at me, "You'd better have a good explanation for that, Cum Bucket, or you'll have to have my stiletto surgically removed from your arse!"

My eyebrows shot up. Not at the threat but at the insult. Cum Bucket? For Christ's sakes, Katie, there are more graceful ways of calling someone a slut. I pushed away the thought, however, and got straight to the point.

"I'm here on behalf of Naomi," I began before she interrupted me again.

"Naomi?" she said, her brow furrowed. But suddenly her eyebrows shot up as she jumped to the wrong conclusion. "You stay the fuck away from Naomi! She makes Emily happy and if I find out you came between them I will personally—"

I pushed her against the locker in an effort to stun her into silence and was stunned myself when I found that it turned me on a bit. Again, I shook away my thoughts and pulled my threatening persona back into place. I glared down at a now silent and wide eyed Katie.

"I'm being mature about this, Katie. Don't think I'm not very upset that Emily has put some distance between me and my best friend."

I had no intention of pausing, but the sadness that flashed into Katie's eyes at my words pulled me into a screeching halt. I hadn't thought about the fact that Naomi had done the same with her and Emily. They had been attached at the hip since I can remember. I'm sure Katie has been feeling just as lonely as I have. Feeling a sudden sympathy for her, I released my grip and took a step back. She didn't need to be pushed around in addition to her recent abandonment. But I was still had something to say, so I began again, my tone a bit lighter than before.

"But, I see how happy she makes her, so I'm dealing with it. I know Naomi would rip my throat out if I threatened Emily, so my only option is to have you relay the message. So, here it is. Naomi means the world to me. And I won't let anyone hurt her, so if I find out that Emily is just some slag who—"

For the second time during this conversation, words were interrupted by violence as Katie slapped me sharply across the face. I simply stared wide eyed at her as she began ranting at me.

"How dare you call Emily that! Who the fuck do you think you are? Let me tell _you_ something! Emily is a better person than you will ever be and she deals with a lot of shit already for being who she is so if anything does go wrong with her and Naomi you will not go anywhere near her! And if you do you'll have to deal with me, yeah?"

Katie probably would have kept yelling at me until someone overheard and stepped in but the smile that had spread over my face at the way she talked about Emily had made her speech slowly lose its venom until she stopped altogether and just stared at me in confusion.

"What?" she spat when her voice found her again.

It was clear to me that in spite of our past differences that Katie and I were now kindred spirits. Listening to her talk about Emily taught me that she cares about her just as much as I care about Naomi. And now that Naomi and Emily had found each other, the two of us were left with all this love for them while they shared their love with someone else. The irony of the situation is what caused the smile to break out over my face. I actually had something in common with Katie Fitch, a very big something in fact. At this moment in time, the two of us understood each other better than anyone else could.

I shook my head and chuckled to myself as I realized what was happening. The universe had thrown us together and the only logical way to handle it would be to become the most unlikely of friends. Our worlds had shattered around us and we needed each other. I looked Katie straight in the eye and flashed an amused grin.

"Wanna get a coffee?" I asked.

I watched her expression change rapidly from surprise, to disgust, to confusion, realization, acceptance, and then amusement all in a matter of seconds and I had to bite back a laugh at the sight. She shook her head and chuckled just as I did, all the while staring at the floor. I watched as she took in our situation, my amused grin never leaving my face. Finally she let out a deep sigh and looked up at me.

"Alright then," she shrugged, "but you're buying."

I flashed my best grin at her and for the first time she smiled back at me. For the first time I saw how pretty she was. Now that we were reluctant friends, I made a mental note to try and make her smile more often. It looked good on her.

It didn't take long for the reluctance to disappear after that. At first we only rang each other to meet up when we were feeling down about not having our other halves around. Then one day Katie rang me because she was pissed at her mum and so we started to talk when we were upset about anything. Then I invited her over for a spliff just because I was bored and from that point on we stopped being each other's personal therapists and started to hang out for real. I found that I actually liked having Katie around. Even more shocking is when I found myself hoping she liked my company as well.

It only took a couple of weeks for us to become just like normal best friends. At this point Katie knows almost as much about me as Naomi does, and I think I might know even more about her than Emily. We spend just as much time together as they do as well. We've even started using pet names for each other and exchanging kisses on the cheek before one of us leaves.

To be honest, I don't even know how my feeling snuck up on me. They should have been painfully obvious from the very beginning. I had always been so entranced by watching Katie before we spoke and then there I was smiling at someone I was supposed to hate. I mean if there was a contest for Roundview's most oblivious student, I would win first place!

The only problem now was what the hell was I going to do about it? I mean, this was Katie I'm-not-the-gay-twin Fitch. I mean sure she was cool with Emily, but you should see the way she reacts when some poor lass gets them confused and starts flirting with her. I mean fur flies, and not always figuratively! One time she actually ripped off a girl's fur coat and threw it off a bridge into traffic. When I asked her why all she said was "She pissed me off! And it looked like shit on her anyway! I would have kept it for myself, but it was too big." All I could do was laugh.

But see, this is my problem. If this is how she reacts when girls hit on her, how the hell am I going to have a chance? I mean I'm sure I could just bury it and settle for being her friend but if I'm honest with myself, I could only handle that for so long. No, eventually I'll have to tell her and just hope she doesn't hate me for it.

I let out a deep sigh and stare up at my ceiling, having every intention of lying here for days as I wallow in the depths of my fucked up situation. But my sulking is disturbed when my phone buzzes from its place propped atop my belly. I pick it up to see who it is and find Katie's face and name illuminating the screen. I press the green button and hold it up to my ear.

"Hey Kay." I say, failing in my attempt to sound unaffected by her call when really I burst with happiness every time I see her face on my phone.

"Hey babes!" she replies cheerfully, "What are you doing today?"

Oh you know, starving myself, pining, obsessing, drowning.

"Nothing. Probably just stay in and get some revision done." I said, trying to sound bored, though I was really hoping she wanted to come over and hang.

"Change of plans," she said, "You're coming out tonight. I've got a new boy toy I want you to meet. He's well lush! We're going to Cook's uncle's pub. The whole gang together for once! It'll be wicked cool. I'll be round to pick you up at six. Laters, babes."

She hung up before I had a chance to protest, and I knew I didn't have a decent excuse to get out of it. So, I dragged myself out of bed and headed down the hall toward the shower. As I got ready I tried to prepare myself for the torture to come. If I know Katie, she'll spend the entire night groping and snogging this bloke in front of everyone, something that I'm really not looking forward to seeing.

I was all ready to go with a few minutes to spare so I decided to stand on the front step and smoke a fag as I waited for Katie to arrive. I figured Katie would probably drive up in a borrowed car from her mother or Mama Fitch with Emily and Naomi in the back seat. What I didn't expect was to see the large SUV that pulled up with tires too big for it and music blaring so loud I could have heard it in the next county. Everything about the car screamed "Look at me, I'm a wanker." Emily and Naomi were nowhere to be seen. Great! So I have to deal with Katie and "Look at me, I'm a wanker." on my own then?

I walked up to the car and glared into the driver's side window. I waited with boiling blood for LAMIAW to pull his vile lips off of my Katie. When he finally did they both grinned at me.

"Effy, this is Matt." She placed a hand on his chest as she introduced him.

I managed to turn my scowl into a tight lipped smile.

"Nice to meet you." I said through gritted teeth. This fucker has got to go.

**AN: Ok! So soon we get our first chapter with the whole gang! It should be a party. :)**


	17. Train Wreck

**AN: Hi guys! :) Firstly, so so so sorry for the gap in the update. It's been just over three weeks. But I just started a new job, so at least I have a valid excuse. :) In addition to that though, I was having a bit of a block. I knew where the story was going, but couldn't seem to figure out how to get it there. I finally got it worked out though. Resulting in this chapter :) So lets see what happened last time... Effy realized she had feelings for Katie. I believe someone asked if we would get to hear Katie's side of the Keffy story-line. The answer is yes. But it may possibly be a while... sorry :/ But who knows, maybe not. We'll see where the story takes us. So... not a positive chapter, and soon the typical teen emotional roller-coaster will be starting. Hope everyone's strapped in. (Horrible pun, horrible, horrible. I should be shot...) Anyways. Enjoy! See you next time! :)**

Emily Fitch

I sat on the bench at the neighbourhood park. This park had become one of my favourite places. If you walked in the right direction, it was mid-way between my house and Naomi's. We had spent nearly every day here since the first time she showed up at my house. But right now, I could be sitting in the midst of my imaginary happy place and it would still be only bittersweet.

I stubbed out my third consecutive fag and took the longest, deepest breath I could as I pressed the green button on my mobile. My heart quickened its pace as I listened to the ringing on the other end. By the fourth ring I was losing my nerve, but just as I went to pull the phone away from my ear she answered.

"Emily?" she said.

I could hear the surprise in her voice. I can't say I blame her. I would be stunned to hear from me too if I were her.

"Hi, Mum." I said. I bit the inside of my cheek and took a few more breaths, trying to keep my nerve. "I need to talk to you."

"Of course, love; whatever you want."

Anger boiled inside of me instantly and I had to stop myself from laughing bitterly at the statement. Right, I thought, I can have whatever I want; I just can't be who I am. I pushed the thoughts away. I didn't call to fight with her; I was done fighting. I wanted to fix this.

"Are you at home?" I asked, wishing for the millionth time that none of this had ever happened and that I didn't have to do this.

"Yes, Dear. Why don't you come on by and have some tea?"

Again, I felt bitterness surge through me. She asked me to 'come by' as if I were a guest, a guest in my own home. I swallowed it again.

"Sure. I'm just at the park; I'll just be a moment." I said and hung up the phone.

This is the last thing I wanted. My thoughts had been repeating themselves ever since the day I told Mum I was gay. _Why couldn't I have been normal? Why does Mum even care what I am? Why can't she just be placid about it? Why can't I just forget about it and pretend I don't have a mother? _

But I knew the answer to all of them. I am who I am, and Mum is who she is. And I can't pretend I don't have a mother because I love her too bloody much. If she never accepts it, it will always break my heart. That's why I have to do this. I'll never be able to figure out where this thing with Naomi is going until I work things out with Mum. I have to know she's ok with it. I just have to.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't even realize my legs were carrying me towards my house. I shook my head to clear it and stared at the front door. I closed my eyes and released a breath as I turned the knob. The first thing I noticed when I walked in was that my fountain was missing.

My bitterness raged within my again, but I couldn't hold it back this time. I slammed the front door shut and stalked into the kitchen where I knew Mum would be waiting. She looked up at me with a knowing smile. She expected my reaction. My blood boiled.

"What's next, Mum? Are you going to turn my bedroom into a fucking workspace for your bloody wedding planning ideas? You know I really can't fucking believe this! I came over here to try and work things out with you and you've moved the one thing that was special to me!"

I wasn't even close to finished, but my lungs were burning. I paused to breathe and Mum took her opportunity to speak, knowing it was the only one she would get.

"Oh for god's sake, Emily, you're still my daughter and this is still your home. I found your fountain in Katie's room a few days ago. I don't know why she has it but I'm sure it's just because she misses you, so I let her keep it."

I stared at her dumbly. That was the last thing I expected. I expected something more like "I didn't want a reminder that my daughter had chosen to betray her family." I let a small smile play upon my face for a moment. Katie really is the best sister in the world. She somehow manages to give me moral support without being anywhere near me. I took the strength that Katie had unknowingly given me and used it to my advantage.

"Mum, I've met someone. I've met someone that I really like. I don't know what to expect from it yet; this is the first time I've ever felt this way about someone. And well, the thing is…" I pause for a moment to wrap my head around what I'm about to do. God I must be a bloody masochist. "The thing is, she's really special to me; and I want to try and see if we can do this. Be together, I mean. But to be completely honest with myself, I don't think I can be happy with her knowing that you don't approve. So basically, what I'm getting at is, please… just… just say its ok."

Jesus. That couldn't have come out any worse if I'd tried. But I suppose as least I said what I meant to, even if it was rambled and scattered. I stared at Mum, my eyes pleading with her. She stared back with an unreadable expression for a long time before dropping her eyes to the floor. She let out a loud sigh.

"Emily. You know I love you…" The tone in her voice told me what she would say before the words left her mouth. It was no use trying to stop the tears that filled my eyes as I waited to hear the words I knew would come. "But I just can't. I know you don't understand, but that's the way I feel. I wish I could tell you otherwise, because I know that's what you need to be happy; but I just can't."

That was it for me. I didn't have any fight left in me. I couldn't be who she wanted, and I couldn't be happy if she wasn't proud of me. I pushed away the hurt and let it be replaced with numbness. I knew that was the only way I could manage. I swallowed back the tears that were starting to stream down my face, gave a sharp nod in my mother's direction, and turned to leave.

I walked out the front door and back down the street. When I reached the park, I returned to my post on the bench and pulled my knees into my chest in an attempt to ward off some of my insecurity. I buried my head between them and took long, steady breaths. I would sit here and do this until I felt ready to face Naomi.

I sat like that for about ten minutes, until I heard familiar footsteps approaching and the smell of weed. I looked up to find Naomi walking towards me with a spliff hanging between her lips. She smiled brightly when our eyes met and I smiled weakly in return.

"Where'd you go, Em? I went by Mama Fitch's and she told me you weren't in. I tried to ring you but it went straight to voicemail."

I know I should have told Naomi what I was up to. Seeing each other had become a daily routine for us, so I knew she would get worried when she didn't hear from me. But I didn't tell anyone I was going to see Mum, not even Katie. I didn't want anyone to know in case nothing changed. I couldn't lie to Naomi, though.

"I went to see Mum." I said in a flat, emotionless tone.

Naomi stopped in her tracks just a few paces away from the bench and stared at me. I could tell she was sizing me up, looking for signs of how I was feeling. I watched her smile falter as she took in my appearance. Though I had forced my crying to be short lived, I knew that it still must have messed up my makeup at least a little bit. And that paired with me being curled into myself only pointed to one conclusion, bad. I watched her eyes fill with sympathy. And though she knew how I felt, she still gave me a chance to explain.

"How'd it go?" she asked. If the look in her eyes hadn't already told me that she knew exactly how it went, her voice certainly would have. Still, I couldn't help but grin at her, at least she was trying.

"I think you already know the answer to that." I said pointedly. She nodded, a frown creeping over her face.

"That I do know. What I don't know is what I can do about it." She said. She looked frustrated; she wore the same expression I had when I was younger and Katie made me angry. I always wanted so badly to pummel her, but all I could do was glare because Mum was in the next room.

"I don't either." I sighed, "I don't know anything anymore."

It was a loaded statement and Naomi could tell. It still amazed me how well she knew me after just short of a year. I knew as soon as her brow furrowed that she would ask me what I meant. When she did, I wondered how many deep breaths I could take in one day before feeling light headed.

"I don't think I can do this, Naoms." I blurted out, not letting myself think about the words. As I spoke I knew I meant every word, but they just felt wrong in my mouth. They made my heart ache. I didn't want to say them, but I knew I had to. "Us, I mean. I just don't know how to deal with my life right now. The only thing I know for sure is that I love you. I'll never be able to put into words how I feel about you; it's the most powerful thing I've ever felt in my entire life. But I just don't think I can love you the way you want me to. Maybe someday I will, but my life is just so fucked up. I don't know how to make it ok. Jesus! I'm making no sense. Maybe one day I'll explain it all to you; I just have to figure it out myself, first."

Naomi stared at me for a long time. I looked her in the eyes, silently begging her to forgive me for being such a fucking mess. I thought about how I would react if I were in her shoes. I knew I was a train wreck; I probably wouldn't know whether to hug me or slap me if I were her. As I stared into her eyes I wondered it that was exactly what she was thinking. She looked so torn, and a little hurt. My guilt continued to build as the moments passed until finally I lost myself again and started to cry. It wasn't because of Mum, who had been the sole cause of all my crying lately. It was because I was angry with myself for doing this to Naomi. It was because I was losing my mind and I couldn't take it anymore.

In spite of what I'd just done to her, Naomi sat down on the bench next to me and wrapped her arms around my waist. She pulled me into her chest and ran her fingers through my hair.

"I know, Em, I know. It's ok. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." Naomi said. Her words were the best comfort I could have gotten. Even though I'd just rejected her, Naomi wouldn't leave me. She would still be my friend. God, she was perfect.

"They fuck you up." I mumbled into her shirt as I cried.

Naomi knew that by "they" I meant "parents". She had already told me all the stories about how her father was a drunk and how he would get angry and hit her mother up until the day that Gina packed them up and moved them to Bristol. And how Gina and Anthea were now sleeping together and hiding it from Naomi and Effy. Honestly, if I hadn't turned out to be gay, I would count myself lucky with parental experiences.

"They don't mean to, Em." She soothed, still stroking my hair.

Naomi was telling me the one thing I needed to be reminded of. My mother wasn't perfect. She tried her best. I knew that, deep down. But it still didn't make it hurt any less.

"But they do." I said, stubbornly.


	18. Make Sure She Knows

**AN: Hi guys! So sorry again for the lack of updates. I actually made you wait over a month this time! Don't kill me, ok? Again, I do have a good reason. We've moved into a new flat and it took us ages to get everything fixed up. We've even still got some things in storage to sort through which brings me to my next point which is: on top of the moving, I've also been getting a shit load of overtime at work. So lately I've been spending every waking hour working, moving, cleaning, or spending some very limited time with my girlfriend. I actually wrote this chapter at work in a notebook and took some time to type it out while Holly drove our mates home after having them over for supper. So there you have it... and without further ado, Miss Naomi Campbell. **

Naomi Campbell

You know what I would like to do? I would like to sneak into the Fitch's house, abduct Jenna Fitch from her sleep, stuff her into the trunk of Anthea's car, drive her to a deserted warehouse and leave her there until she realises what she's got! She's fucked up Emily's mind so badly that even though Emily has accepted that she's gay, she still won't allow herself to be happy. God! I've never been so pissed off with another human being in my life! I'm all about keeping the peace but I swear to God, if Jenna Fitch crosses my path I will not hesitate to rearrange her face!

I take a deep breath and try to push my anger away. Emily will be meeting me at the park in 15 minutes and I don't want to spend our time together bitching about her poor excuse for a mother. I check myself in the mirror one last time before heading out to meet Emily. It's a short walk and I soon find myself grinning happily at my girl sitting on the swings, facing the other direction.

"Need a push?" I ask her.

My smile falters when she turns to look at me. She smiles weakly but she's been crying. I step around the swing so that we are face to face.

"What is it, Em?" I ask as I brush the fringe from her face. It's a stupid question, of course; no doubt this has something to do with Jenna. She grabs and hand and squeezes it, sighing deeply.

"Nothing new," she says, "I just feel like I'm losing my mind."

I wrap her in my arms and squeeze her tightly to which she responds immediately, holding on for dear life. I press light kisses to her hair. I know I shouldn't, we're not together and I'm not supposed to do things like that. But she doesn't pull away and I'm grateful. I pull back a bit and take hold of her cheeks, tilting her head up until our eyes meet.

"Things will get better, Em, I promise." I tell her. I look her straight in those gorgeous, deep chocolate orbs and silently beg her to believe me. Her lip quivers and a fresh batch of tears fill her eyes and spill over.

"How do you know?" she asks me in a hoarse voice. It breaks my heart to see her like this. I kiss her forehead and flash the most encouraging smile I can muster.

"Can't stay bad forever, can it?" I ask and hope that my attempt to lift her spirits is working. The corners of her lips curl up into a small but genuine smile. I know my own smile must have grown into a big, goofy grin. Nothing makes me happier than seeing Emily smile, especially when I'm the cause of it. My grin doesn't last long though. It's wiped off seconds later when I find Emily on her feet and her hand at the back of my neck. Her lips crash into mine and my eyes widen. That was completely unexpected.

As soon as our lips connected, my body was screaming at me to respond. I knew I couldn't, though. Emily is a mess and a snog session when she's vulnerable would only make matters worse. So I stand, frozen, with my hands on Emily's hips and my eyes shut tightly, telling my body to shut the hell up. It only takes a few seconds for Emily to realize what she's doing and pull away. She steps back and stares at me, wide eyed, with a hand over her mouth. Her eyes are full of tears again.

"Oh God, Naomi, I'm sorry. I…" She's stammering away, trying to come up with an excuse for her actions. I don't even think as I step forward and give her a light peck on the lips. When I pull away her hand flies towards her mouth again and I grab it before it gets there, holding it tightly in mine.

"It's ok, Em." I tell her. I don't know what to say to make it ok to her, so I lie. If I can't make it ok, I can at least make it easier. "It was just a kiss. It doesn't have to mean anything."

It's the most ridiculous lie I've ever told. The words felt so wrong on my lips. Kissing Emily would always mean something. And not being allowed to will inevitably drive me barmy! But I love her, God I love her. And I know she loves me too. It's the way she looks at me; the way she's always looked at me. It's inexplicable. I just look at her and I know that we're supposed to be together. So I know that while Emily is struggling, we're still bound to "slip up" now and then. I'm not stupid enough to think that we can actually be just friends, even temporarily. And if "slip ups" that are inevitable are too much for Emily right now then she has to believe it's innocent. I can do that if that's what she needs. I'll do whatever it takes to keep her sane.

Emily stares at me a moment longer until finally looking down at her hands. She nods, slowly.

"Ok" she says in a barely audible voice.

I'm not sure why, but Emily's reaction is giving me an uneasy feeling. Could she really believe me so easily? I open my mouth to take it back but think better of it. Maybe its best just to leave it for now. Everything is so fucked up and Emily's not the only one who's confused anymore. I don't know how to handle what Emily is going through and it's starting to do my head in. So maybe simpler is better for now, even if it's a lie.

I place my finger under her chin and bring her eyes to meet mine once more.

"Why don't we go for a swim?" I ask her with a playful smile. She grins her adorable grin back at me and we rush off, hand in hand, to Mama Fitch's.

Once we arrive I go straight up to "my" room. Since Emily has been staying her and I'm always over as well, that is what Mama Fitch has deemed my usual guest room. Along with my skimpiest bikini that I leave here specifically for swimming with Emily, I also have several changes of clothes and a small collection of toiletries that I keep here. It really does feel like a second home.

Once changed, I head down the stairs and make my way towards the back yard. My hand is on the knob and I'm about to push open the door when I hear a voice behind me.

"Make sure she knows, Naomi." It says. I turn to find Mama Fitch sitting on the couch in the living room and poking her head through the doorway. She smiles at me and I return the favour.

"She may be a mess right now," she continues, "but I know she's never felt about anyone the way she feels about you. And I know you feel the same. I can see it in the way you look at each other. Don't let that slip away because of Jenna, love. You've got to fight for her. Emily is fragile right now and it won't take much for her to lose confidence. So make sure she knows." I can't help the warm smile that spreads across my face. I really do love this woman. I give her a small nod.

"Thank you." I tell her and I take my leave to the back yard.

Emily is already in the pool, floating about on the top of the water with her head tilted back. I stand still for a moment and watch her. She is so beautiful. After taking some time to revel in the sight before me, I step down quietly into the water. I tread carefully, trying hard to make no sound as I make my way towards Emily. I watch Emily closely, looking for signs that she's heard me. I can tell she has as her lips twitch slightly upward when I reach her. I lightly take hold of her ankles and she seems to read my mind as she opens her legs allowing me to step between them.

She pulls herself up and wraps her arms and legs around my frame. I do what comes naturally, despite our situation, and wrap my arms round her neck. I pull her into me and the kiss is passionate and hungry, almost as if we both believe it will be our last. When we finally pull away for air she is smiling at me and it tells me that everything really will get better.

"I'm sorry." I tell her. Mama Fitch is right; I have to make sure she knows. I can't lose her. I won't. "I know you're not ready for this right now with everything you're going through. And I promise from now on I'll try my best to keep my hands to myself. But I'm not giving up on this, Ems. I didn't even know what love was until I met you. You've changed my life in so many ways without even changing a thing. Just because of knowing you I feel like a better person. I know you need time to wrap your head around this thing with your Mum, but I just need you to know that I love you. And when you're ready, I don't care how long it takes, I'll be here. I'll always be here."

Emily tightened her grip around my waist and didn't let go. She laid her head down on my shoulder and spoke into my chest.

"I'm sorry too, Naoms. I'm sorry that I'm putting you through all of this. You've been so wonderful to me; you've been kinder than anyone I've ever come into contact with. It's not fair what I'm doing to you, stringing you about." She's looking up at me now and once again there are tears in her eyes. The first day, when all of this is over, that I go a whole day without seeing Emily cry will be the happiest day of my life. "Until you came along, Mum mattered more than anyone. My only goal in life, the only thing I ever wanted, was to make her happy. But I just never seemed to fit. Katie was the daughter she always wanted. I never blamed her, it wasn't her fault, but they just liked all the same things and Mum could never get enough. But I wanted to play football with my little twat of a best friend from round the corner who was only ten and already treated women like a sex toy."

We both took a moment to chuckle at the mental image of Cook at ten years old. He really was a twat, but you just had to love him.

"But my point is," she began again, "I've never been what Mum wanted me to be. And now there's this. And even though it feels so right, like it's the only other thing I've been missing in my life, I just want it all to go away so that I can look that little bit better in Mum's eyes."

My heart is breaking for Emily. I can't imagine what it's like to have your parent's approval mean so much to you and not have it, what it would be like going through every day believing that you'll never be good enough. It's no wonder she can't let herself be with me, let herself be loved; the one person's love she's always wished for came back as only disappointment. I'm amazed by Emily's strength; if it were me, I don't think I could even make it through the day. I kiss Emily's knuckles and wipe away the single tear that has rolled down my cheek. I take a few silent moments and try to understand Jenna Fitch.

"She does love you, Ems. How could she not?" I knew that Emily wouldn't believe me. I'm not even sure if I believe myself. But regardless of how Jenna is behaving, I just can't imagine a mother with no love for their child, no matter how "wrong" they may turn out. She'll come around eventually, won't she? She must.

"And you don't need to apologize to me, gorgeous." I seize another opportunity to make a joke and ease Emily's mind. "You're losing your mind, remember? I can't exactly hold you responsible for anything you may do"

Emily stares at me a moment and I give her a cheeky smile. After a second, a wide grin spreads over her face as well.

"Bitch!" she says as she splashes me. I giggle as I try to get away from her, splashing wildly behind me and hoping some of it is reaching her.

"Takes one to know one, doesn't it?" I say. Her mouth drops in mock surprise before lunging forward and trying to dunk me under.

Before long, we wore ourselves out in the pool and decided to go inside. We went to our separate rooms to change, I made us both a midnight snack, and we headed back upstairs to Emily's room. "Would you mind cuddling up with me tonight?" she had asked me. And how could I say no?

**AN: I think we'll be hearing from Effy next, and I believe Katie will be making her HFF debut in chapter 20. I don't know about you but I'm quite excited to hear from Katie. :) Also... while at work I had an idea for a new fic and I've already gotten started on it. I haven't thought of a title yet, but if you like supernatural fics, you might like it. It's got an XMEN feel to it. Alright, well, I'm gonna go smoke a fag and reprimand my cat because she just peed on my hoodie. Love to you. See you next time. :)**


	19. She Kissed Me Back

**AN: As promised. :) And before Sunday, too! **

Effy

We arrive at some swanky pub that looks like it's made for bankers and CEOs; it's about the farthest thing from our group's usual scene.

"I thought we were going to Keith's…" I said, already getting the feeling that tonight was going to be shit. Not only has Wanker's obnoxious choice in music given me a headache but now everyone from inside the pub is glaring at us as well. I've always wondered, do irritating people actually know they're irritating or are they too thick to work it out?

"Matt is going to spend the extra money to take us somewhere a bit nicer. You know, somewhere that doesn't smell like piss. Appreciate it, ok?" Katie tells me. I sigh; anything for you, Katiekins.

"Sure." I tell her as I climb out of the back seat.

We go inside and I smile when I see everyone sitting at a corner table, acting as usual despite the fancier location. I watch Cook take five shots one right after the other. After each one he howls loudly and slams his glass on the table. Freddie and JJ are engaged in a contest to see who can hold their breath the longest; and Panda and Thomas are pressed against the wall, snogging like it will save them from the apocalypse. But Emily and Naomi are nowhere to be seen. I'm not surprised, really. Kay told me what Em's been going through.

Cook spots us first. He howls loudly again and rushes over to hug us both. I smile but Katie turns up her nose and shoves him away.

"Aww. Where's the love, Katiekins?" she flips him off and he turns his attention to Wanker. "Hey, mate." He says, simply, and heads back to the table. I smirk and follow after him. Cook sets a shot in front of me and I gratefully accept.

"Cheers." I tell him and I throw my head back, welcoming the burn.

"Alright, Princess?" he asks me. I try to keep my eyes from drifting toward Katie but I fail miserably.

"Fine." I say, flatly. Cook follows my gaze and his eyes widen.

"What?" He says disbelievingly.

"Shut up." I tell him. Please, kill me.

"Oh, fuckin' hell!" He hoots. My eyes nearly pop out of my head.

"Keep it down, Tosser!" I growl at him, cuffing him round the ear. He just chuckles and shakes his head. A second later Katie appears at my side. She's alone. Good, I hope the prick got shanked in the toilet.

"Matt's gone to get us a round." She announces. Oh, still standing then… Pity. "What are we talking about?" Katie asks, looking between me and Cook. I glare at Cook, daring him to open his mouth.

"Just commenting on your new bloke," he says, "seems like a keeper." I kick him under the table and his eyes widen. He shuts his mouth.

"Yeah, he's well lush." Katie says, grinning from ear to ear.

"I don't know, Katie. I think you could do better." Thomas interjects and winks at me. I didn't even realise he had been listening. I flash him a small smile and pull my phone from my pocket.

I hover over Naomi's name for a few minutes before sighing and slipping my phone back in its place. I can hardly talk to her about Katie, can I? I'm not ready for Emily to know and I can't ask Nai to lie to her. Katie notices what I've just done and wraps her arms around my shoulders.

"It's ok, you know," she says, "You can call her. I don't mind." I lean my head back onto her shoulder and kiss her cheek.

"Maybe later." I say. I've been talking to Katie about everything, lately, but I can't exactly go to her with this one. I guess that only leaves one option. I turn my attention to Cook.

"Fag?" I ask him, waving my pack in front of his face. He follows me outside. I light a cigarette and pass it to him before lighting my own.

"Cheers." He says. We sit quietly for several minutes until Cook finally breaks the silence.

"Come on, Eff." He says, "I know you didn't invite me out here just for a smoke." I throw my head back and sigh.

"What the fuck am I doing?" I ask both Cook and myself.

"Fair question, love." He says, "Right state you're in, innit?"

"Not helping, Cook."

"Right. So why don't you tell her?" He asks and I can't help but laugh.

"Sure. I can see that now. 'Hi, Kay. I know you're straight and have horrible taste in men but I thought you should know I'm in love with you.' Brilliant plan, Cook."

"Well then you're fucked, aren't ya?" He says, sounding annoyed, "Too pussy to take a chance, little girl." And with that he walks away.

Fuck!

I sit a while longer with my head between my knees until I hear Katie's voice round the corner.

"Eff?" she says as she comes into view, "Are you alright?"

Fuck it.

"Actually, Kay, I wanted to talk to…"

"Later, yeah?" she interrupts me, "we're about to start a game of truth or dare."

"What are we, twelve?" I say, unable to hide my amusement. Katie smiles at me.

"Whatever, Bitch." She says, "Come on. It'll be more fun if you play." I feign annoyance.

"Fuck it." I say, "Go ahead and disappoint me." She gives me a hand up and we walk back into the pub.

"Ooo! Effy's next!" Panda shouts the second she spots me. This is going to be fucking horrible; but I can't help but smile. Panda is just a picture of sweetness. She's also quite drunk.

"Alright, Amy Winehouse, hit me." I say. She grins from ear to ear and starts bouncing up and down.

"Truth or dare?" She's practically squealing.

"Well, I don't want to make it too exciting right out of the gate. Truth." Everyone groans except for Panda who is busy trying to think of a question to ask me.

"I got it!" she shrieks. Oh fuck, she looks way too happy about this. I don't think I want to play this game.

"Do you love someone?" she asks. Well at least it doesn't give away too much.

"Yes." I say, simply, and Panda shrieks with joy. I roll my eyes. I knew this night was going to suck.

"Who?" Katie demands, and I can't meet her eyes.

"One question at a time, Katiekins," Cook says, "Your turn, Eff. Choose a victim." He winks at me. I let out a sigh of relief and look around the group. My eyes land on Katie and I bite my lip. Should I? After a few seconds' thought I make up my mind.

"Pick your poision, Kay." I say to her. I already know she'll pick truth; and when she gives her answer I smile because I was right.

"Have you ever thought of being with another girl?" I ask her. Her eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

"Of course n—"

"Truth!" I interrupt her and stare hard at her, showing her that I'll know if she lies. She sighs loudly.

"Alright!" she growls at me and I can't help but smirk. "Yeah. I've thought about it, ok?" Wanker is look at Katie with nothing but shock and I have to say I'm please. He's definitely history, now.

"What the fuck is your problem?" Katie scolds him when she sees his expression. Oh Jesus. He's literally cowering. What a pussy!

"Nothing, babes." He says like a scolded child.

"Too fucking right." Katie snaps back, "And for the record, sweetheart, I'm not gay. I said I've thought about it. I didn't say I'd do it."

"Alright, alright, calm down, kiddies." Cook interjects, "It's your turn, Katiekins."

"Alright." She says, "Babes? Truth or Dare?" Wanker gives Katie what I guess is supposed to be a challenging look.

"Dare." He says matter-of-factly. Oh, you stupid tosser. Katie is smirking at him.

"You and Cook. Snogging." She challenges him, "You're up for it, right Cook?" Cook throws his head back and howls with laughter.

"Of course, Princess." He says through his chuckles. I snort out a laugh. Cook has no attraction to men, whatsoever, but he does love to piss people off. The wanker is now glaring at Katie like he wants to strangle her.

"No." He says, flatly. In unison, everyone in the group shakes their head.

"Right. Sorry guys." Katie addresses the group before turning to Wanker, "We're leaving. You can pretty much fuck off, now."

He stares at her as if he's only now just seen her and we all get up to leave. We're about halfway out the door when he shouts after us.

"Dirty Faggots! The lot of you!" He says and Katie stops in her tracks. We all watch as she marches back over to him and punches him right between the eyes. He falls to the ground, blood pouring from his nose.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" he snaps at her, spitting blood everywhere.

"I'm Katie Fucking Fitch, Who the fuck are you?" she shouts at him, kicks him back down, and storms towards us. We follow her out.

"So where to, now?" I ask when we get outside.

"I say we go to Uncle Keith's where we belong, yeah?" Cook offers.

Katie shakes her head and hooks her arm through mine. She motions her hand between us.

"We're going back to Eff's. See you guys later, ok?"

"Sure thing, Princess." Cook says and waggles his eyebrows.

Katie huffs in irritation and starts walking away. I follow.

"Alright boys," I hear Cook say behind us, "It's time to Partaay!" I smirk and shake my head.

When we arrive at mine I send Katie up to my room and run to have a wee. When I get back Katie is sitting on my bed with Pato in her lap. She quickly wipes her eyes when she sees me.

"Kay? What's wrong?" I ask.

"Why is it that every time I think I like a guy, he turns out to be a homophobic twat?" she blurts out, "Mum's already run Ems out of the house. I can't have some fucking tosser keeping her away from me too!"

Katie know that a douchebag boyfriend would never come between her and Emily. There's something she's not telling me.

"Your boyfriend doesn't have to like Emily. You've had plenty that didn't get along with her. As long as he hasn't hurt her there's never been a problem." Ok, so I know that's not entirely true. The moment anyone so much as look at Em the wrong way, Katie's eyes go red, boyfriend or not. But I'm digging. There's something she wants to say but is too afraid to say it, and I'm going to get it out of her.

"But it is a problem, Eff. She's my sister. My _twin _sister. I know we have our differences but deep down we're the same. If you've got a problem with Emsy, you've got a problem with me." Interesting. Ok, I'm going in.

"Katie, about my question from the game earlier…"

"Don't ask me who, Eff." She warns me.

"No. I just wanted to know what you meant. Like was it just 'Hmm. My sister's gay. I wonder what it's like.' Or have you actually had feelings for someone?"

"I don't want to talk about it, Eff." She tells me. But I'm going crazy. I have to know if I have a chance.

"Please, Katie." I beg. I actually beg. "You can tell me." She sighs.

"I don't know. I've just been a little confused lately is all." She tries to deflect, not realizing she's telling me exactly what I want to know. 'Lately' she said. The only girl she sees 'lately' is me. My heart is racing now and my head is getting fuzzy.

I want to ask her, just so I can know for sure but I can't seem to get the words out of my mouth. Before I do, Katie asks something of her own.

"What about Panda's question? You said you loved someone; who is it?"

Oh God. I'm gonna have to tell her now, before I know if she really feels it too. I feel like my head is going to explode from my pulse pounding in my ears. This could be the best day of my fucking life; or I could lose my best friend. And now is the time that I have to find out. I release a shaky breath.

"Katie, I…" The words catch in my throat as I look up at her. Those gorgeous eyes that she and Emily share never cease to captivate me. There's something more to Katie's thought. I can look into Emily's eyes and revel in the beauty of them; but I get lost in Katie's, every time. "I…" I try again but still the words won't come. "Oh fuck it!" I say aloud and launch myself forward, crashing my lips against Katie's. It takes a few seconds, but she responds to the kiss and when she does, I feel like I've been lit on fire.

The kiss becomes heated very quickly and hands start to wander onto hips, into hair, and I'm especially surprised when Katie actually grabs my arse. Our lips stay locked until we need to come up for air. When we finally break apart my eyes take a few seconds to focus and when I can see straight I find Katie is staring in another direction with her mouth wide open, apparently stunned by what's just happened. Her eyes meet mine just long enough for her brain to register what she's seeing before:

"I've gotta go." She says in a low voice and she's gone.

I don't even care that she ran. I didn't expect her to be able to take it all in at once. There's one thing I do care about, though, and it's the one thing that will keep this smile on my face no matter how long she takes. She kissed me back.

***Squeals***


	20. Down the Rabbit Hole

**AN: Hello, friends! Miss me? Ok... so now we get to see how Katie's dealing with her little encounter with Eff. Who's ready to see Katie go off the rails? Enjoy.**

Katie

"Breathe, Katie. Just fucking breathe!" I say aloud to myself as I walk aimlessly through the streets of Bristol. My phone buzzes in my pocket and I pull it out even though I know I should ignore it. I know who it's from.

"Kay, it's alright. Please come back." Effy's text reads. I almost do go back. She's always so concerned and bloody wonderful and it's so fucking cu-.

"No!" I shout at myself, "God, what the fuck is wrong with you?" Jesus Christ, Fitch, you do not think she's cute!

"Probably nothing." A voice from behind me says. I nearly jump out of my skin and turn to see the source of the words.

"What the fuck?" I say to a lanky, dark haired boy with tattoos cluttering his arms, feeling very annoyed with this random stranger for bothering me at this particular moment.

"Although, you may want to stop talking to yourself in public or someone might think there is…" I stare at him blankly.

"Something wrong with you…" he clarifies as if I didn't understand.

"Can I help you with something?" I ask the mysterious stranger who in my opinion is seeming stranger by the second. He shakes his head and reaches in his pocket, producing a pair of kick boxing gloves.

"You could pummel me for a bit if you like, though. Perhaps it would help?" This guy can't be serious.

"Who the fuck are you?" I'm trying to be polite, really I am. But who the fuck offers for a complete stranger to beat them about? He smiles at me and holds his arms out to his sides.

"For you, I'm whoever you want me to be." He says. Ok, enough of this.

"Right." I say, "See you." I start to walk away but when I hear footsteps following me I turn on my heels. "You know, I'm really close to taking you up on that offer!" I stare him down as threateningly as I can manage, "Without the gloves." I add as he starts to put his hands in his pockets.

He smirks at me and pulls out a small bag instead. I look inside and see several tiny white tabs.

"You can do that if you like." He says, pulling out a flask from his back pocket, "or you can follow me."

He takes a tab fom the baggie and pops it into his mouth, washing it down with the contents of the flask. He steps closer to me and holds them both out, offering me some. I scoff.

"You think I would take drugs from some random bloke on the street?" He cocks his head to the side and gives me a challenging look.

"Perhaps you need to prove something." He says. My eyes widen. Who the hell is this guy? And why does it seem like he knows me? I stare at my feet for a long time, trying to wrap my head around everything that has nothing to do with the man in front of me. I can feel my body tensing and the pressure in my head building. I'm not ready to deal with this.

I look back at the man still standing in front of me, holding out a cocktail to make my problems go away. I sigh. What the fuck? Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right? I stare at the baggie and the flask one after the other a big "EAT ME, DRINK ME" staring back at me about to take me to a magical place where it doesn't matter that nothing makes sense.

I take a tab from the baggie and place it on my tongue. I try to swallow it dry but it sticks in my throat. I take the flask and tilt it back, letting the warm liquid surf its way down my throat. The contents of the flask are even stranger than their owner. It burns like alcohol, but tastes thick and comforting, like coconut milk, and smells like lavender.

"Woah." I say as I try to steady myself. The effects were instantaneous. These are no ordinary drugs.

"Relax." The boy who remains nameless says to me. "It's magic." I look over at him and see a huge grin on his face. I start to giggle uncontrollably.

"You look completely monged!" I tell him through giggles. His grin, if it's even possible, widens.

"Ditto, gorgeous." He says and for a moment my smile disappears. Why does that sound wrong, coming from him? I shake my head to banish the thoughts. This is not the time to wade around in my fucked up brain. I plaster the smile back on my face.

"So, Stranger-danger," I giggle at myself before continuing, "You want me to follow you, where are we going?" His face is positively beaming as he offers me his hand.

"Down the rabbit hole." He says. I take his hand and we're off, me dragging behind. The city is nothing but a blur of light and colour as we run through the streets. When we finally stop, its outside of what appears to be a circus tent. I stare at it, confused. It's not so much odd that there is a circus tent here. What is odd, though is that I walked by this clearing this morning and it was empty. There's no way a tent this size could be set up that fast. The nameless boy is watching me and shaking his head.

"I told you." He says through a chuckle, "It's magic." I return his chuckle with one of my own.

"Right. Welcome to the Bibbity Bobbity Circus." I say and I run into the tent. "Fuck." I breath out. It's the only reaction I can really manage at the sight in front of me. Every few feet along the ceiling, are women hanging from brilliantly colored silks. The way they move is mesmerizing.

I watch in awe as they twist and turn about. It's both graceful and extreme, both fascinating and frightening. It's beautiful. I don't know how much time has passed when I finally break out of my trance. I only know it must have been a very long time because I realize I'm starving. I look around for my nameless companion and find him down in the centre ring chatting animatedly with some of the performers. I walk down to meet him.

"Oh look, more strange people." I say with a smirk. They all turn and grin widely at me. One of them holds his hands out to his sides.

"It's what we were born to be." He says. I look him in the face and my heart stops. Suddenly Effy's face is floating before me, taking the place of his. I shake my head furiously.

"You alright?" he asks me? I stare blankly at the ground as I answer.

"Fine." I say, reminding myself of Effy again with my short, monotone answer. I look up and meet his eyes again. I feel chills. "What did you say your name was?" He smiles at me.

"I didn't." I smile back awkwardly, realizing he's right.

"Right." I say, "It's just… your eyes." He stares at me amusedly before turning to my nameless companion.

"Where'd you pick this one up, mate?" he asks, "She fits in perfectly." No-name laughs.

"She was talking to herself when I found her, like full on." He replies.

I roll my eyes at them. They may be strange and mysterious by they're still fucking boys, talking about me as if I'm not even here. I clear my throat and they turn to look at me.

"The nutter's hungry," I say in a tone that mixes playful and annoyed, "so can we go?" No-name takes my hand and we start to walk away. We're walking backwards and waving when the boy with Effy's eyes calls after us.

"Later, mate. You and your lezzer have fun. Bring her back to see us, yeah?" I stop dead in my tracks. I let go of no-name's hand and march back up to him.

"What did you call me?" I ask him, surprised by the fact that I'm not angry, just curious. Why would he assume I'm gay? He smiles.

"Not a lezzer, then?" he asks and doesn't wait for an answer before he continues, "You may want to reconsider that. The way you were ogling the aerialists… well, you may surprise yourself."

I shake my head. "I'm not gay." I say and I don't know if I'm trying to convince him or myself.

"You sure?" he asks me with a knowing look. I let out a defeated sigh.

"If I said no, would I regret it?" I ask him. He shrugs.

"Maybe. But not because of me." He says with a smile. I find myself staring at his eyes again. I don't know how long I was lost in them before he spoke again.

"Actually," he says, "I have a sister I think you'd be perfect for. Want her number?" He winks at me and I smile.

"No thanks." I say as I turn again to leave. I only get a few steps before my curiosity gets the better of me. It's just too weird. I have to ask.

"Sorry," I tell him, "I know it goes against your whole mysterious lifestyle and all, but you remind me of someone. And well, can I know your name?" I don't know what knowing his name will tell me, but I just need to know. I need some kind of explanation why my eyes see him but my mind sees Effy. He gives me an Effy-like smile and leans into my ear.

"Tony Stonem." He says and for the second time he caused my heart to stop.

"You're her brother." I whisper almost inaudibly but he hears. He's silent for a moment but then his eyes widen.

"Are you… You're Katie!" he exclaims, pointing a finger at me. I don't know what to do with, or even how to describe the emotions running through me. She told him about me? She's told me all about Tony and how she hasn't seen him for months. She hardly ever gets a chance to speak to him and she spends that time talking about me? I've never been that important to anyone before. My eyes fill with tears that threaten to spill over.

"Yeah. That's me." I say with a broken voice and a watery smile. He give me a small smile back.

"She loves you, you know." He tells me. I nod slowly.

"Yeah," I say, "I'm getting that." I smile at the ground with Tony watching me. My head feels fuzzy as I look back up into his Effy-like eyes. I smile at him.

"See you, yeah?" I ask and he nods. And with that I take my leave, still reeling from the events of the past two days but much, much happier. When I reach the door of the tent I find No-name standing outside waiting for me.

"You two know each other, then?" he asked me.

"We do now." I tell him with a smile.

"Cool." He says and I notice he's looking at me funny. "Do you want to get to know me?" he looks hopeful. Oh Christ, here we go. Another lost little boy with a crush on Katiekins. Wait, I don't usually find that annoying. I shake my head furiously and give him my best 'come and get it' smile, just like I've always done.

"Do you want me to want to get to know you?" I ask him. He smiles at me.

"I wouldn't mind." He says. I stare at him a moment. So I'm confused as fuck about Effy but I'm still me, right? So why am I even second guessing this? I lunge forward and knock us both to the ground. I land on top of him and my lips are on his. His hands begin to wander instantly and he starts to unbutton my top. We continue feverishly for a minute more before my brain kicks in. Everything about this feels wrong. His hands are too big, too rough; his body is too hard; his stubble tickles in the wrong way. I put my palm on his chest and push myself away. He stops just as quickly as we started and stares at me.

"What's up?" he asks, looking concerned. I sigh.

"Sorry, mate, it just isn't a goer." I tell him apologetically. He shrugs and gets up.

"Fair enough." He says as he straightens his clothing. I have to say I'm surprised.

"You're not even gonna try and convince me?" I ask, "Most guys would." He smiles at me.

"Most guys aren't me, babe." He says. I shake my head.

"You are definitely a surprise." I tell him. He chuckles.

"It's only an illusion." He tells me. I shake my head.

"Ok, freak." I tell him, "Let's get that food, now." He smiles and holds out his arm for me to take. I link my arm with his and we're on our way.

"So are you gonna tell me your name, now that we know each other so well?" I ask him with a smirk. He scrunches up his nose and nods.

"Sounds fair… Mike." He says. I smile at him.

"Katie." I reply. He grins.

"Nice to meet you." He says, holding out his hand for me to shake. I roll my eyes.

"Shut up, Tosser!"

**AN: So I really enjoyed writing this chapter. It completely got away from me, but I loved every second of it. I feel like it let us get to know Katie a bit better, but also, it was just all around fun. How about those reviews? See you next time. **


	21. Tired of Fighting (Part One)

**AN: Hello, lovelies! This chapter had to be split in half because I don't know what I was thinking when I was writing it but it ended up hella long... So here's part one. I have a review to address. To alexberkeley: Weren't you paying attention, love? It's magic! :) So anyways... here it is. Enjoy!**

Emily

I wake up tangled with Naomi and a smile lights up my face. I let my eyes travel every visible inch of her and like always I'm breathless. She's so beautiful. I trace my fingertips lightly over her cheek and she smiles in her sleep. That's when the tears come again. Why did she have to pick me? She's perfect; and she could've done so much better. All I've done is hurt her.

Naomi stirs and I quickly try to compose myself. I practically sing praises when my phone rings, giving me an excuse to hide. I quickly grab it from the night table and run into the hallway. Still wiping at my eyes, I answer it.

"Morning, Kay." I say to my sister and my mind is wiped completely clean when she replies.

"Emmmssssyyyy!" she all but shouts down the phone. Always count on Katie to be a good distraction.

"Fuck's sake, Katie, what have you taken?" I ask her and her immediate reply is to giggle.

"No idea." She tell me and I roll my eyes.

"Jesus" I sigh, pulling the phone away so she doesn't hear me. I replace it to my ear. "Kay, are you alright?" I ask.

"Tip-top, Emsy! She giggles and a long silence follows. I scrunch up my brow.

"Err, Kay, was there a reason you called?" I ask her. Usually Katie doesn't waste time with words, ever. She just says what she's thinking and gets on with it.

"I want to see you." She says. That's more like it. "I need to see you." She adds and her blissful, drug induced tone has vanished. I nod, even though she can't see me.

"Alright." I tell her, "We'll have a night out, yeah? Have everyone to a club." I know she's smiling on the other end. Whenever Katie needs to clear her head there's only one way for her: Party.

"Perfect" she says, "You call everyone, yeah? Meet at Effy's at 9. Love you." and with that she hangs up. I roll my eyes and walk back into the room.

"Were you crying?" is the first thing I hear from a now wide awake Naomi. I sigh. No point in lying to her. She'll squeeze it out of me anyway.

"Yeah." I nod, "I'm always crying." I add, bitterly. Naomi frowns.

"What was it this time?" she asks and my heart melts at how helpless she looks. She wants so badly to make me ok.

"Nothing." I shrug, "Just me." Her frown gets bigger and I kiss her temple to show her I'll be alright. She smiles lightly and my heart soars only to crash and burn when I remember that it's my fault this isn't real. We're not really together and it's because I'm a chicken shit.

"Who was on the phone?" she asks me and I'm glad for the distraction.

"Katie." I tell her, "We're going out tonight." I search her eyes, seeking approval. She simply nods as if she doesn't care, one way or the other. "Club." I tell her, "We're meeting at yours at 9." She nods again, with a small smile this time.

"Good, I've been missing Eff, anyway." She says and I start to feel guilty again. Not only am I jerking her heart around but I'm taking time from her best friend as well. Naomi notices my expression.

"Hey," she says, pushing hair from my face, "I'd rather be with you. That's my choice, ok?" God. I want to kiss that sweet look right off of her. How did she get so perfect? And why is she wasting it on me?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX XXXXX

The rest of the day goes by with Naomi and I just hanging about, watching telly. We decided we would get ready for tonight at Naomi's and at half eight that's where we are, approaching the Stonem/Campbell house.

"I haven't been home in ages." Naomi comments, "I wonder how Mum is."

"Well let's go find out." I tell her and I grab her hand, dragging her toward the house. When we get inside it is quite the sight to behold. There is Karaoke again but this time it's just Gina, singing off key and completely munted while Anthea sits on the sofa behind her, shaking her head. Gina kneels in front of Anthea and sings to her and Anthea gets up, stomping out of the room.

Naomi and I stare, wide eyed. I look around and find Effy sitting on the stairs, fag in hand, and watching Gina with her brow furrowed. I nudge Naomi with my elbow and point to her. She walks over and I follow.

"What's going on?" she asks Effy, her voice full of concern. Effy shrugs.

"Been like this for days." She says, "One day it's Mum, the next it's Gina and the other just sits there and glares." She shakes her head and Naomi frowns.

"And your mum hasn't mentioned anything to you?" she asks her best friend and Effy shakes her head.

"Yours?" she asks.

"Haven't spoken for days." Naomi tells her. They both stare at the floor in thought for a moment until Naomi suddenly perks up.

"We agreed it wasn't our business, yeah?" she says and Effy nods, though still looking concerned. Naomi sits down next to her best friend and smiles. She places a hand on her knee.

"Missed you, Eff." She syas and suddenly she is wrapped in a tackle of a hug.

"I missed you, too." Effy says, her voice muffled from being tucked into Naomi. Naomi laughs tearily and pulls back to look at Effy. Suddenly she's frowning again.

"You've got news. What is it?" she demands and Effy laughs.

"I'll tell you later." She says, "go get ready." They have a short conversation with nothing but their eyes and I smile at the fact that I can read them both. Naomi smiles and stands up, jerking her head up the stairs.

"Come on, Em." She says and I follow her, catching a smirk from Effy as I pass. I raise an eyebrow but keep walking.

"Think your mum's ok?" I ask Naomi as we enter her room. She shrugs.

"Eff and I agreed to stay out of it. They wouldn't tell us, anyway." She says with finality, though still sounding concerned. I nod and walk over to Naomi's wardrobe, opening the drawer with clothes she picked out for me a while ago. She wouldn't let me take them home.

"Those look far too good on you to allow Katie access to them." She had said. I smiled at the memory as I picked out what I would wear.

"Babe?" I close my eyes and scold myself for my mistake. I sigh as I open them again and turn to see her smiling at me in a pair of jeans and only her bra to cover the upper half of her body. My breath catches and I have to shake my head to keep myself from staring.

"Which shoes do you think?" I ask, holding up my outfit and looking anywhere but Naomi. From the corner of my eye I see her open the closet and look inside. She comes out again with a box and hands it to me.

"These." She says. I take the box and stare determinedly at the floor.

"Thanks." I say, quietly. We finish in silence and as we descend the stairs we find that the others have all arrived. My eyes fall on Katie and see that her own eyes are glossy and wandering.

"Kay." I grab her attention and she grins dreamily at me.

"The best sister in the world is here!" she sings and throws her arms around me. Over Katie's shoulder I look at Effy questioningly. She shrugs but won't make direct eye contact. I frown and scan my eyes around the group. They all shrug as well and I sigh, pulling Katie away so I can look at her. I stare long enough to wipe the grin off her face. I know she won't tell me what's going on, if she was going to she would have done, already. So I do the only thing I can.

"I love you." I tell her, making sure she meets my eyes. Her own eyes instantly become watery and she throws her arms around me again.

"I love you, too." She says in an almost whisper. After a few seconds of holding her, another body joins our embrace.

"Group hug!" Cook bellows, joyfully, and the rest of the group joins in, smiling. Except for Effy who seems to have left the room. I look around for her until I hear a horn blaring outside.

"Fantastic!" Cook shouts, "Love is all around, now let's get going!" He separates the group and practically runs out the front door. We all follow and find Effy sitting in the driver's seat of Anthea's car.

"We're driving?" I ask to which Panda nods enthusiastically.

"I'm not drinking" she says, "So I can drive home if you're all too fucked." I smile at her. Panda is the best. She's so bubbly and she just sort of glows. You can't help but be happy in her presence. We all pile into the car and when we make it to the club I catch Katie by the arm.

"Be careful, yeah?" I tell her, knowing she'll understand my meaning. I don't think I could handle a trip to the hospital right now. She nods and I kiss her cheek. I give her arm a light squeeze and head off to find Naomi. The second I spot her I grab her hand and pull her toward the dance floor.

"I haven't even had a drink!" she protest and were miraculously saved when Cook pops up at our side with a tray of shots.

"Two, please, girls! Bottom's up!" he says and we both do as he requests, downing two shots each and placing the empty glasses back on the tray. He grins widely at us.

"Just a tick and I'll bring you birds a bottle." He announces and disappear. We both chuckle at him and I turn to Naomi.

"Happy now?" I ask and I don't wait for her to answer but drag her, again, towards the dance floor. I choose a spot with fairly open space and press myself into her. We dance that way for a while and I quickly realize that this wasn't my best idea. It's driving me crazy, being so close to her, and I'm pretty sure my knickers are completely destroyed. I turn to face her and lean into her ear.

"Gonna take a break." I tell her and make eye contact to make sure she heard me. She nods and I wander off to find somewhere to sit. Cook takes my place and I smile at him before scanning around the room. I spot Panda sitting alone at one of the sofas and my way over to her.

"Where's Thomas?" I ask as I sit down. She points to the DJ booth where he is speaking to the DJ and snooping around. I breathe out a short laugh and turn back to her.

"So why no drinking?" I ask her.

"Oh, doctor says I'm not supposed to." She says and my eyebrows shoot up.

"Doctor?" I ask her and she nods, "What doctor?" I ask.

"The baby doctor, stupid!" she says as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. I take a second to let it sink in and then turn to her again.

"You're pregnant? Have you told your Mum?" I ask. She looks horrified.

"Oh I can't do that!" she says, "She'd only do an agony flip and go rah-rah!"

I bite back a laugh at her way of saying it and try to be srious.

"You've got to tell her, Panda." I reason and she nods, suddenly serious.

"I know, but not yet." She says and then smiles, "Me and Tommo are gonna be the best parents ever." She adds and I look between her and Thomas and smile.

"Yeah, you will." I tell her. We sit quietly for a few minutes and I was the rest of our friends moving about the club. I watch Cook and Naomi dancing and smile at them.

**AN: Sorta weird place to stop, I know, but I really just didn't want a monster chapter... Part 2 up tomorrow. See you next time. :)**


	22. Tired of Fighting (Part Two)

**AN: Part 2, as promised. :)**

Emily

The smile is wiped off my face a second later when I see Cook put his hand behind Naomi's head and slam their mouths together. My blood runs cold as I watch the kiss unfold before me. I can't tell whether my heart has stopped or is just beating so fast I can't feel it anymore. I hear a muffled sound at my side and it takes a moment to realize that Panda is trying to get my attention.

"Sorry, Panda, gotta go." The words are out of my mouth even though I didn't make a conscious choice to say them. I get to my feet; I don't know where I'm going but when I finally stop I realize I'm on the back deck where everyone goes to smoke. I spot a bench and sit down, starring at the ground.

It doesn't take long for my solitude to be invaded. From the corner of my eye I can see Naomi coming towards me, looking like she's bricking it.

"Em?" she says, but I don't look at her. I keep my eyes firmly on the ground. I'm shaking a bit and it doesn't go unnoticed. She knows I saw. "Panda told me you saw. Not that it matters, I would have told you anyway, but… Em, please look at me."

I lift my head and by now the initial shock has worn off and there are tears in my eyes. She kneels down in front of me, her own eyes glistening, and takes hold of my face.

"I don't think he's gonna walk right for a while." She tells me and I almost laugh when I figure out what she meant. She kicked him in the balls. I almost laugh, but I still sort of feel like I've lost my mind. I stare into her eyes, looking for truth there and its exactly what I find.

"He's a tough bloke to fight off." She adds, raising an eyebrow in a way that says: 'Come on, Em. You don't think I'd willingly snog that tosser, do you?' Ok… so maybe I should know she wouldn't. He's repulsive; but that doesn't ease the tightness in my chest any.

"Can I bum a fag?" I ask out of nowhere, my voice still sounding like it belongs to someone else. She lights one for me and with my first drag I instantly feel a bit calmer. I take one more long drag and speak through the exhale.

"I can't dictate who you snog anyway, can I?" I don't even know where it came from. The guilt of what I've been doing to Naomi is constantly in the back of my mind. She is always so lovely and even though she acts fine, I know I'm hurting her. I can see it in the shadows of her eyes. I wish I could be ok for her, so we could be happy.

Naomi is shaking her head at me.

"I'm yours, Em, whether you're ready for me or not. I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me to." She says and for the first time the idea strikes me. Maybe I should tell her to go. Maybe she'd be better off. But the thought of losing her scares me to death, so I don't. I'm feeling claustrophobic, now, with all my insecurities doing a victory dance in my head and I need to get out of here.

"Can you take me home?" I ask Naomi. She simply nods and holds out her hand. I take it and we make our way through the club. We decide to walk home since its fairly nice out and we're short on cash. I text Katie to tell her we've gone and in about thirty minutes we arrive at Mama Fitch's. We go straight upstairs and Naomi goes toward her room. I tighten my grip on her hand and pull her back towards me.

"I'm just gonna get cleaned up. I'll be back in a minute." She tells me, so I nod and let her go.

I can't seem to get the image of Cook and Naomi out of my head. It's stupid because I know it meant nothing, but still it hovers over me like a cartoon raincloud. At least Cook could love her back if that's what she wanted. I'd let him have her if it made her happy. But I shake those thoughts out of my head. She knows what she wants. At least she says she does. Naomi comes back into the room in baggy pyjamas and the first thing she does is shake her head at me again. She walks over to me and plants a small kiss on my lips.

"No, Em, ok?" she says, "I don't want him or anyone else. Sure, I feel like I'm going crazy right along with you sometimes, but I don't care. I only do what I want and I will sit right here at your side until the end of the world unless you order me away. I don't care if I die waiting because I love you and whether you're ready or not you love me too. And I'm not just gonna give up on that because you're scared. I'm here, ok?"

It was then that I noticed how dark Naomi's eyes had become. She was positively bursting with emotion and despite my stupid mind and its ever present fear it was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. And I needed to see more; I wanted her to look at me that way forever.

"I'm here." She continues, stepping closer to me, "and I'm in your bed. And I want you more than I've ever wanted anything in my life." She stares hard at me now, like she's trying to tell me with her eyes because words just aren't enough. She looks down at our hands that are now joined together and then back up at me. "So just… even if it's just for a little while… just, be brave, and want me back."

I have no words to describe the way I feel right now. My eyes are stinging with tears threatening to show themselves; my heart is racing, mouth is dry, head is spinning, and every inch of my skin is humming as if I've got an electric current coursing through my body. For a moment the combination of sensation leaves me dumbfounded and I stand still, trying to comprehend it all. But it's not long before instinct kicks in and I've thrown myself at Naomi, kissing her like it's oxygen and I'll simply die if I don't.

For once, if only for right now, I'm not thinking of what my family thinks. I'm not afraid of waking up and finding my mother here and Naomi gone. For once I'm not me; I'm someone braver that me. If only for right now, I'm the girl Naomi deserves. And I want her. Oh my god, do I want her! So for once I take what I want and I let my hands begin to wander as Naomi returns one hell of a kiss.

My hands travel slowly down her arms and around her waist and I pull her into me. Her hands are in my hair and I hear a soft whimper escape her lips. The sound sends a rush of heat through my body, traveling low and stopping at my centre. I drop one hand slightly lower and get a grip on Naomi's arse as the heat between us grows. My other hand makes its way under Naomi's top until it comes into contact with warm, bare flesh and before long I'm pulling the top over her head. My eyes travel over Naomi's bra clad breasts and bare torso and my first instinct is to touch it. So I do. My hands travel up her stomach and come to rest at the base of her breasts.

My eyes widen; I'm in awe of what's happening. I, the girl who's afraid of life, am touching Naomi Campbell's breasts. Naomi lifts my own top over my head and when we come back together we're skin to skin. The sticky heat in my knickers increases ten fold and a guttural sound escapes my throat. Oh god, she feels amazing! I slowly lead Naomi back until the backs of her knees hit the bed. She scoots back onto it and pulls me towards her by my belt.

I place one knee between her legs and crawl over her as she leans back on her elbows. Our lips connect again as I lower myself onto her until we are once again skin to skin. I can feel her heart pounding and the sound of her scattered breathing is driving me mad.

I release her lips and start trailing kisses down her neckline and over her breasts. I push her bra aside and take one hard nipple into my mouth, sucking hard. She groans loudly and the sound spurs me on. My hands travel low again and I undo the button of her jeans and wiggle them past her hips, tossing them to the floor. Just as I'm about to resume my position Naomi sits up and starts undoing my own jeans. I fully remove her bra as she does so and the sight I'm rewarded with is breath-taking.

I take a nipple into my mouth again and lean forward, persuading Naomi to lie down. Her arms reach around me and just before our bodies touch, my own bra is disposed of. When I land over her this time the only thing separating us is the thin fabric of our knickers and I can feel Naomi's damp heat on my thigh. Naomi's breath hitches at the contact and I can't help the small smile that spreads across my face. I see her flushed skin and her strangled breath and I love that it's all because of me.

There's only one more thing to go before this happens for real and as my fingers find the waistband of her knickers I hesitate. I've never actually done this before. What if I'm no good?

"Em, what's wrong?" Naomi asks me when she notices I've stopped. My skin flushes a deeper shade of pink.

"Well, it's just… you know… I… I've never…" I fumble over my words and thankfully Naomi catches on.

She smiles lightly and sits up. Without breaking eye contact she reaches out and slides off my knickers and tosses them aside. She then scoots back and slips off her own. I wonder how I'm still alive as I stare at a completely naked Naomi sitting in front of me. She smiles at me again and I'm not sure if my head is actually attached to my body right now. She leans back again, presenting herself to me on a silver platter. She holds her arms out.

"Come here." She says and I do. In this moment I would do anything she asked. Anything. She kisses me softly and then leans over to my ear.

"Just follow my lead, yeah?" she whispers and the feeling of her breath on my neck sends shivers through me and I have to wait for my mind to work properly again before I respond with a nod.

Naomi kisses along my neck and shoulders and anywhere she can reach from her position beneath me. Her hands snake their way down my spine and come to rest on my hips. They stay there for a moment as Naomi nibbles along my neck. When she looks at me again only a thin line of blue can be seen in her eyes as her pupils have covered the rest.

"You ok?" she asks me in a voice that says: 'for the love of god, please don't change your mind now'.

I lean forward and kiss her deeply, causing her to moan again.

"I feel fucking amazing." I tell her truthfully. Never in my life have I felt so at peace and so anxious at the same time and the combination is the most incredible sensation I've ever felt. She smiles at me almost wickedly and a short chuckle escapes her.

"Well, whatever's better than 'fucking amazing', get ready for that." She says and no sooner are the words out of her mouth that her fingers finally move to their prize and I think I just exploded. Wait, no, still here. Oh, Jesus! Her fingers move in a circular patter over my clit and I moan loudly.

My hips begin to rock back and forth on her hand and it takes a moment to remember what she told me: Follow her lead. I shift my weight to one arm and allow my other hand to find her centre. I reach the sticky heat and begin to circle my finger just as Naomi is doing to me. Her body tenses at the contact and a fresh flood of warmth reaches Naomi's fingers.

I lean down onto my forearm to be closer to her and once again my lips find hers. The kiss is new, a fresh connection that will never be possible to break. No matter what happens, Naomi is part of me now; and I'm part of her. Our hips are grinding together now as we discover new parts of each other. Naomi stops moving and I'm about to protest when she pushes two fingers deep inside me, her thumb continuing to circle my clit.

"Oh, fuck." I breathe out as I nearly collapse on top of her. 'No objections there!' I think as she starts to pump her fingers in and out. I follow her lead once again and push two fingers into her. And god if that isn't the most amazing thing I've ever had the pleasure of touching. I pump my fingers in and out as I circle her clit with my thumb. It doesn't take long with us continuing like this for me to feel my orgasm rising. It's similar to last time but oh so much better!

I can tell Naomi is close too and when I feel her fingers curl inside me, I do the same. Seconds later we scream in unison as we both fall simultaneously over the edge. I collapse on top of her and pepper kisses over her neck as we both catch our breaths.

"Sure you're a virgin?" Naomi pants into my hair. I raise my head to see a gorgeous smile on her face which I return.

"Not anymore." I grin and she breathes out a laugh.

"Well then, Fitch," she says, "you've discovered a natural talent." I blush at this and lean down to kiss her. The kiss continues for a long time and as our mouths move together my mind floods with images of us, like this, together, with nothing between us. Before I can stop them the tears come and I can't tell whether I'm happy or broken. Naomi notices and pulls away, taking hold of my face as she goes.

"Em, what's wrong?" she asks, concern evident in her eyes. I try to come up with an answer but when one doesn't come, I laugh bitterly at myself.

"I don't know." I tell her, honestly. And no sooner are the words out of my moth that the answer hits me. I sit up and Naomi follows, watching me closely. I take a deep breath and try to hold back my tears so I can speak.

"I can't do this anymore." I say and Naomi's eyes widen in fear. I shake my head, knowing what she must be thinking.

"I can't keep fighting it." I clarify, "I can't keep trying to make everyone else happy! It's not fair!" the words come out in a strangled yell and I watch tears stream down Naomi's face. I take a deep breath to calm down a bit and when I speak again my voice is weak, "She's my Mum. She's supposed to love me no matter what." I shake my head as if trying to shake my mother from existence.

I meet Naomi's eyes and my gaze doesn't falter. I need her to see that I mean what I'm about to say.

"I love you." I tell her, "And I can't keep trying not to." There are tears streaming down both our faces as we stare at each other.

"Then don't" she tells me like it's the simplest thing in the world, "Just be with me, Em. I don't need you to be perfect!" she wipes tears from my face with her thumb. "We can do this!" she tells me and despite the fear that still stalks at the back of my mind, I believe her.

"Ok." I say and snake my arms around her, holding her as tightly as I can.

**AN: marsupial1974... How does now sound? :) Thanks again, lovelies... See you next time! **


End file.
